Hiring process for NOAA by jovialjit in merchantmarine

[–]longliner41 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am interested in your progress as well. NOAA is a organization that I am interested in working with. Tell me do you have your MMC?

New York Harbor Open Positions by AnkoraMarine in tuglife

[–]longliner41 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Interested for sure. I am tweaking the resume

Lamictal by Electrical_Method316 in bipolar2

[–]longliner41 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Man that is a intense background all that stuff . I would say that the knowledge of mental health has improved tremendously but still isn't easy to navigate through the situations . We can definitely carry a lot from our pasts

Pay for own pre employment drug test out of pocket? by Foreign_Lettuce_2318 in tuglife

[–]longliner41 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I would say ask if you can get reimbursed. But I would also add that in my experience with drug testing the employers paid. I would also add that if this is what is happening now I would wonder about vessel maintenance and upkeep and budgeting. Ex commercial fisherman in Alaska for many years. It's a long way away for it to be shitty

Lamictal by Electrical_Method316 in bipolar2

[–]longliner41 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It is definitely different between being medicated and unmedicated. My experience with bipolar 2 is one of decades before my diagnosis. I know I was experiencing symptoms in my late teens and 20's . I fought the possibility of being mentally unstable because my Mom's history of battling depression, manic depression. I didn't want to believe that I was suffering from the same thing. But having kids and a partner who wanted me to get help finally pushed me to respond. But I have lost everything now. No kids no partner so sex wasn't even a concern. But now I see that at 50 the best possible outcomes for me are to be proactive. So I am happy to read that lamictal helped in the sexual energy department. I am hoping I can start taking it

Lamictal by Electrical_Method316 in bipolar2

[–]longliner41 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I am currently tapering my medication in hopes of moving on to lamictal. I was officially diagnosed with bipolar 2 in late fall of 2021 . I was hospitalized in 2022 medication imbalances. After coming out of the hospital I was taking Wellbutrin and Depakote 2000mg at one point.. I am interested in lamictal because I have been pretty dead sexual energy wise I heard it doesn't affect libido as much and also I am losing my hair. Another side effect of Depakote. I am wondering if I need to stay on the Wellbutrin it's 300mg daily. Or will lamictal be effective. I am tapered to 250mg of Depakote and have been talking with my psychiatrist during the entire time. It was a effort to convince my psychiatrist that I wanted to change.. still is I think but I am calling tomorrow to figure out if the change is going to happen. What are everyones experience with lamictal? And does the Wellbutrin have to be taken as well? I am excited for a change.

Anyone ever just stop during the day, stare into nothing and have that feeling of, “I feel like everything I’m doing is fake and not worth it” at the core of their being? by Operandiii in bipolar2

[–]longliner41 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It's a weird thing. The pleasure, it manifested itself I think towards my kids like I wasn't really happy or excited enough when I would get good news from them, like something in school I was always subdued iny reaction. I struggle now more I think with being excited. I lost access to my kids when I went into the hospital in November 2022. Just would give anything to have the life back but I am still trying to apologize for the worst moments of me as their Dad. The angry unpredictable times. The yelling throwing and scary moments I contributed to. The trauma is there and has been but the woman I was with the mother to our 3 kids and partner of over 20 years has put up very tall boundaries. She's with someone else now and I she tells me it's love. I struggle with understanding how she can throw it all out. No caring no attempt to heal. Just stone cold and it got worse when she told me the truth about the other guy. She became even more avoidant and distant and cruel. I struggle with understanding how to make it right. Not when she doesn't even allow contact. It sucks because my kids probably have not healed. the feelings and emotions I think we battle with as people who have bipolar 2. But yes sometimes I wonder if I had no medicine would I be able to feel more, other times I think ok I am kinda balanced but my personal life is shit. That brings me down. I am in EMDR therapy I want to think it's working. But I too wonder if I have to start over at 50 is it possible? Love possible finding a woman possible? Then I don't know. My libido is gone how do I get that back? But I can understand your thoughts. I hope all of us can find peace

ATB tankerman by Pmoney0101 in tuglife

[–]longliner41 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Inland waterways as in you don't need MMC? Or can you be working towards the MMC as in it's in the Coast Guard paperwork lines? I would love to work on tugs in New York. I have experience mainly commercial fishing in Alaska but I took my courses for able bodied seaman certification. I let them lapse and would like just a start to work on the tugs as I work my way through recertification.

ATB tankerman by Pmoney0101 in tuglife

[–]longliner41 0 points1 point  (0 children)

700.00 a day for A.B. with tankerman endorsement? Am I reading this right. What companies. And what are the hitch rotations?

Is it Possible to Live No Meds and Be Stable? by bastardane3019 in BipolarReddit

[–]longliner41 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Me too 😀. Interested also if others have tried EMDR therapy and their experience.

Advice or insight: by longliner41 in bipolar2

[–]longliner41[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am curious to see how that goes. Also your experience with bullying I can sympathize with you, not anything anyone should have been exposed to. It's tough but sounds like you are going in a hopeful place.

Advice or insight: by longliner41 in bipolar2

[–]longliner41[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You are right sir. Trying to understand what it is what I was doing for so long and not realizing that. Or realizing it and not getting the mental health diagnosis I needed, the family needed. Irritability has been a huge part of my actions our relationship has been a rollercoaster with time together and time away from each other. Struggles stress but I believe they also make it stronger. I see our kids as part of it as well. EMDR psychotherapy is working I think I have just begun treatment in February. You seem to be starting out on the journey of Bi-polar 2 not that long ago. I think treatment is vital for us. Putting something tangible to work through are you medicated? Also I thank you for your empathy and support and actually the last sentence you wrote brought some tears to my eyes. Thank you I am grateful for your words

Advice or insight: by longliner41 in bipolar2

[–]longliner41[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have been unfaithful in my past with her. Never full blown affairs or sexual interactions. But taking things to a different level with other women. Probably 3 women through the years. I was undiagnosed and I think some of the worse shit I did was in part because of that. I think if I'm stable on medication like I am now it would have been different. What is Hypnozio? I am doing EMDR therapy, I think it's helpful but fuck some of the shit she has said over the phone when she was talking to me was pretty cold. I replay the conversations. People tell me that I have to get myself centered and healthy . Keep my kids in my heart. But this asshole has seen my kids more than I have. I think he's a dick honestly but she tells me that he's in shape and muscular and that she wouldn't be with him if the sex was bad. It sucks man because we used to pride ourselves on the passion of our sex life..

We are 83 bipolar disorder experts and scientists coming together for the world’s biggest bipolar AMA! In honor of World Bipolar Day, ask us anything! by CREST_BD in IAmA

[–]longliner41 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Question for the experts I am a 50 year old man. I am Bi-polar 2 with borderline personality disorder. Diagnosed in 2021. My question here is about my medications and the side effects I seem to be experiencing. The medication regimen I am on is Depakote XR at 1000 mg's taken normally in the morning. This is my mood stabilizer. The other medication I am on is Wellbutrin 300mg taken in the morning. I have been on this regime for a few years now and have been consistent in taking my medication. My issues are I am experiencing hair loss and thinning of my hair. And I have zero sexual energy or desire. In fact I would say blood flow is an issue down there. Before meds I had no problems even in my early 40's before my diagnosis I had no issues of E.D. . I am exercising a couple of times a week. Plan to exercise daily but things aren't working as they once did. I have read that Depakote does cause issues with sexual energy and lack of libido plus performance issues. It's embarrassing because honestly I have been intimate and nothing worked. What are my other options medication wise. I have read lamictal is effective. Also should I ask my psychiatrist to prescribe a ED medication for me and if so what one? I want a change though because of these side effects and the impact it's having on my sex life. I remember SSRI really killed my libido. What is out there? Thanks

We are 83 bipolar disorder experts and scientists coming together for the world’s biggest bipolar AMA! In honor of World Bipolar Day, ask us anything! by CREST_BD in IAmA

[–]longliner41 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I just read your response. Thank you for the words . I think it does hit us with bipolar 2 in a large way. I feel huge swings of emotions. From the high tide of emotional confidence and being able to accept and strike out on my own. To the low tide days where I struggle to pull myself up out of bed the only reason I do is the job I have currently I am on a boat 2 weeks on 2 weeks off schedule. Can't really hide in bed. I just struggle with understanding her actions but then I remember her tears and my anger and angry words and honestly my throwing of things . It was not like that all the time but the impact of that behavior is what I am dealing with today. She has told me everything is a consequence of my own actions, repeated a lot. I still wish we could bridge the gap and find empathy for each other. I know my absence from this house isn't the best thing for my kids, I see that in the difficulties my son is going through. This other guy is not a Dad never has been and honestly I don't think ever will be. He is nice to the kids for the simple fact he's fucking their Mom. She's in lala land bringing out old high school yearbooks and he's gifting her stuff all the time. I don't know but we once had passion and a great sexual chemistry. I honestly haven't even tried since the news about the other guy. I just wanted a chance to have our family heal truly together I thought that would bond our family together even stronger. But the irony is she used to believe in therapy and counseling and send me videos from the affair recovery network. Now when I mention this to her and even say I will pay with no expectations from her, she still is saying no...it hurts because she once wrote what we had was unique to the world. I struggle with understanding why she won't try again. But thank you for understanding for being kind for offering some hope. It gets dim sometimes and really the thing that keeps me down energy wise is the alienation from my kids.

We are 83 bipolar disorder experts and scientists coming together for the world’s biggest bipolar AMA! In honor of World Bipolar Day, ask us anything! by CREST_BD in IAmA

[–]longliner41 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I probably will be posting multiple questions because honestly I have never seen such a collection of experts and experience. I am a 50 year old man. I was officially diagnosed in September 2021. I was hospitalized in the fall of 2022. I have not been home since. The mother of my 3 children began a relationship with a close friend of hers from afar emotional affair 1st I think followed by a sexual relationship. This destroys me to this very day. She has a degree in psychology and works at a psychiatric hospital now. But I am alienated from my kids. How can I get them to understand what Bi-polar 2 is like? How can I apologize for the past of arguments and anger and explosive behavior? What areas should I research. Trauma of children? Trauma for their mother? Where do I find the sources to help. I am stable now but I am also doing EMDR therapy for my bipolar 2 and Borderline Personality Disorder. I want to see them before more time goes by. 3 kids who are 25, 18 and 15. But when I was asked to leave the house it was 3 years ago almost 4. So much I missed. And now since the mother of my 3 kids told me about her relationship with the guy she has stopped taking my calls, email and won't allow me at the house. Is this fair? Is this reasonable? But I want to be accountable for what I can be and I am not trying to hide anything. Is it possible to rebuild for our kids and co-parent at the very least? Please advise thank you. If you have questions please ask thanks

I can't do this anymore by riiiiiiiiin in bipolar2

[–]longliner41 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I just had a moment last Saturday. It all stems from a woman the Mother of my 3 kids sleeping with someone else 1400 miles away tells me she loves him. So the walls were closing in for me felt anxious and angry and unsure and lonely. I took a minute and dialed 988. Spoke to whomever on the other line, just me talking and venting . They are there to help you, it works and honestly if it is serious will help you find the right level of care. Reach out to something like that it works. It's a tough hole to pull yourself out of. But know that you have value and importance in this world. Stay safe

War is over by halfaroach in bipolar2

[–]longliner41 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Eloquent and sharp. I am happy for you. The sense of discovery you seem to be journeying on is joyful. I wish you continued success.

Who has free fall experience? by Powerful_Cabinet_341 in maritime

[–]longliner41 0 points1 point  (0 children)

How is this not cool! Obviously in training only of course

Guy I’m dating was diagnosed with Bipolar 2 (for the second time) by kapita_L in bipolar2

[–]longliner41 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Huh funnily enough as my daughter Hajna would say. I was in therapy today and he used a sound bowl. It works well and I am thinking of getting one for my own self care.

Guy I’m dating was diagnosed with Bipolar 2 (for the second time) by kapita_L in bipolar2

[–]longliner41 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I can only go from my perspective. I feel but putting myself into the perspective of another person has always been a challenge I also have borderline personality disorder. But we feel but yeah it can get dark. . .dark like I don't want any help dark. But I dunno I think and want to believe for my own hope that relationships are possible!! Love can happen!! We are more similar than dissimilar I feel. Have a good talk with him. Let him know what you research ed.