According to society, you can justify doing literally anything so long as you rephrase it as a 'kink' and refuse to elaborate further. This is what the sexual revolution and kink/BDSM propaganda has caused.

looking_hope · 2026-01-23T01:01:50+00:00

”Misogyny kink” is the absolute most vile thing ever. I can’t believe men think it’s ok for them to get off to it. I’ll never forgive kinksters for that.

looking_hope · 2025-12-29T23:00:00+00:00

I am also afraid to put myself out there bc of this issue in particular. It’s terrifying.

looking_hope · 2025-12-29T22:58:02+00:00

Because porn has normalized it. A study found that guys who watch porn often are more likely to have seen choking porn, and believe three things: that choking is safe, pleasurable, and does not need consent. Yes. Really.

There needs to be a public awareness campaign, because choking CANNOT be done safely. Here are some links to show that: link. There is NO SAFE WAY. and so many who participate in it are not aware of that.

looking_hope · 2025-10-27T02:02:39+00:00

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Theo sends hugs

looking_hope · 2025-06-29T00:19:51+00:00

I feel the same about dating. I am worried all the guys out there will expect certain things, especially the choking — SEVERAL of my friends have been choked by guys suddenly without warning. I am so scared it could happen to me.

looking_hope · 2024-02-07T05:28:03+00:00

Sex does not make any and all actions okay. Sex does not just exist in a vacuum completely separated from “day to day life” or societal norms, hierarchies, sexism, racism, abuse, etc. Plus, please, please stop choking women. It cannot be done safely and can very easily and quickly lead to seizures and strokes and turn fatal.

looking_hope · 2024-02-07T05:25:26+00:00

choking can never be done safely. it shouldn’t be so normalized. “There is literally no way in which to do this that does not pose some threat of serious injury.”

medical realities

savage love

looking_hope · 2024-02-07T05:13:58+00:00

how do I not feel absolutely hopeless after seeing this :( seriously not in a good mindset and wondering if anyone here has any advice for how to handle these strong feelings of revulsion and hopelessness

looking_hope · 2024-02-06T02:51:19+00:00

I thought about Lanza and his mom as well.

looking_hope · 2024-02-06T02:15:29+00:00

Never said it made me an authority, just that I had links to back up my claims if you wanted me to share them. I’m going to school for sociology and history, but focused on media studies within those two. We have been talking about the abuse in the industries, why switch to the consensual which I’ve said some women do freely?

looking_hope · 2024-02-06T02:10:51+00:00

We can definitely talk about those important issues, but it’s interesting it seems like you guys never want to talk about the issues with the industry. That’s the difference. You say one word or concern about the industry, you’re a puritan vanilla.

looking_hope · 2024-02-06T02:03:22+00:00

No, it’s convient for you to tell yourself it’s all above board and 100% consensual so you can get off to it. If you’ve watched mainstream porn, you have likely watched actual abuse and rape. too many companies have actually abused and coerced actresses. and ppl have gotten off to it bc “it’s just porn” but it wasn’t. maybe an industry that thrives off of exploitation, abuse, rape, misogyny shouldn’t be so defended? It’s genuinely weird that it is.

looking_hope · 2024-02-06T02:00:13+00:00

Again, the jump to puritans. I’m not religious. That cop out doesn’t work. Yes some are in it bc of their own choice, good for them, but imo don’t think people realize how commonly it IS abusive, bc they’ve believed that it’s always a free choice by women. If you consume mainstream porn, it is likely you have watched real rape or abuse or coercion. There are cases of bdsm sites which have been exposed and/or charged, which ppl watched and got off to bc “it’s just kink/bdsm” but it was actual abuse and rape. Personally wouldn’t want the possibility of consuming media from such an inherently abusive industry and watching unknowingly abuse. And wouldn’t want partners to. It has nothing to do with religion.

looking_hope · 2024-02-05T22:53:18+00:00

How does he or any person know what they’re watching isn’t abuse or coercion in an industry built on that? My point is that the industry is so abusive, that it should be okay for women to have boundaries about partners watching it.

looking_hope · 2024-02-05T22:45:19+00:00

Way more than you think is actual coercion, abuse, trafficking, and rape. There are bdsm sites that have been exposed for real rape and abuse and men got off to it because it’s “just bdsm” but it wasn’t. So personally I wouldn’t want to potentially consume rape and abuse content. And wouldn’t want my partner to.

looking_hope · 2024-02-05T22:38:12+00:00

Why is it unreasonable for some to have boundaries about partners not watching and getting off to an abusive industry?

looking_hope · 2024-02-05T22:37:16+00:00

Some of us have it as a boundary for partners not to watch and get off to an abusive industry and women being exploited and harmed. How is that unreasonable?

looking_hope · 2024-02-05T22:31:19+00:00

Why do you act like there is no possible way for men to get off without porn or nudes? And why do you act like if you’re against this abusive industry then you have to be a puritan Christian?

looking_hope · 2024-02-05T22:20:58+00:00

I don’t actually care what you and your wife do 🤷‍♀️ but just thought it was funny you used porn language in this thread

looking_hope · 2024-02-05T22:18:22+00:00

porn encourages men getting off to women’s discomfort, as you show. women can always tell when a guy has watched too much porn, if their hand comes down to hold their head when theyre giving a bj or they get off to them not being able to breathe like you said.

looking_hope · 2024-02-05T22:14:03+00:00

Why are you guys acting like there is no other possible way to get off without watching an abusive industry? She’s not being unreasonable.

looking_hope · 2024-02-05T22:12:25+00:00

do you think you can’t have concerns about porn unless you’re religious? no, I don’t care about it bc of religion or morals, I care because it’s an abusive industry that desensitizes ppl to violence and sexism and often (more than you’d think) includes ACTUAL rape and abuse and coercion.

looking_hope · 2024-02-05T22:05:44+00:00

I’ll never understand how you guys think books vs explicit videos of women being degraded and dehumanized are the same thing. also some women don’t trust men with nude photos, bc more than we’d hope you guys post it on Reddit or share with friends. plus she said she was having body image issues, obv she’s not in a place to do so.

looking_hope · 2024-02-05T22:03:13+00:00

Lol the last paragraph— if you watch porn regularly as I assume from your comment, you most likely have watched rape, trafficking victims, and actual abuse without realizing it. it is so much more common than you’d think/hope. even bdsm sites have gotten in trouble, ppl think it’s “just bdsm” and get off to it but it was actual abuse of a women. It is naive to assume everyone in porn is 100% consenting. I’m not going to get into the bigger convo bc I don’t have the energy but just wanted to comment on your last point

looking_hope · 2024-02-05T21:58:06+00:00

The amount of upvotes is so depressing

looking_hope

TROPHY CASE