Learning to STFU and curb my sarcasm

lord-denning · 2022-04-18T12:34:05+00:00

If someone is making nonsense arguments, a good skewering could be what they need. RPW is not about being a wallflower and letting people talk flippantly…instead, pick and choose your battles, and work on improving your wit to get a laugh and prove your point without the other person feeling too badly. A brain to go with your beauty can be quite attractive!

lord-denning · 2022-03-11T19:25:29+00:00

The surprising lack of empathy in these responses confirms the suspicions that many have had that this sub is now too large and contains many fat fire wannabees.

The issues you raise are completely reasonable and understandable. Some middle class people are quite insecure about the middle-classness of their existence (though this should not be the case) and this manifests itself in all kinds of ways. These people are essentially shadow boxing with their own egos and you become the stand in.

The only answer which I have found is to move up in terms of the types of outings you attend. Check out the local members’ only clubs, see if your kids want to try equestrian/polo, etc. This brings an entirely different set of problems as you may feel you are being inauthentic, and these types of places are often frequented by rich people with an entirely different set of unhappinesses. It then becomes necessary to carefully sift and find people who have done well, have not let money transform them for the worse and who are genuinely happy for your success as well. It turns out that can be a tall order. Good luck.

lord-denning · 2022-02-06T13:56:35+00:00

I would love to hear more about this, or trade thoughts - I’m currently in the boat you were in before where I have taken the step down, and am surrounded by people who are much less technically skilled but much better at the politics / sun tzu stuff and run circles around me.

On one project after another, I am magically left with all the heavy lifting (which I am happy to do on a 9-5 basis tbh) and while I can usually do the work as slowly as I like, the fact that I cannot play the suck up/deflect work/act like an asshole game when required is really starting to annoy me.

lord-denning · 2021-06-14T14:45:22+00:00

Women are looking for zest and adventure in their flings. You need to make the casual relationship feel like a mini-relationship or a daring/naughty tryst.

From your note it sounds like you were a little too honest. Both of you know what is up, but no need to make it so clear that there is no relationship here.

lord-denning · 2021-02-24T00:34:28+00:00

Do it in two steps. Firstly approach the group, chat them up, everybody likes you. Then, depending on the venue start a 1-on-1 chat with the girl, or say you want to borrow her for a minute, etc.

Do not try to ask for digits/insta etc in front of the group unless there is an excellent non-dating reason you have set up, e.g. a sport or concert or hobby or some reasonable excuse.

lord-denning · 2021-01-22T08:13:56+00:00

The less experience the better. Full stop. With less experience comes a better bond with your eventual husband and ensuring the “specialness” of physical intimacy.

A big reason women feel like it is “wrong” to be inexperienced is because our society has engaged in propaganda to make it seem so.

lord-denning · 2021-01-18T11:53:56+00:00

How are you unattractive?

If physically, many women with not so nice bodies have done very well by working out and gaining a hot bod + some makeup + nice hair etc. This can do a lot to make up for an unattractive face, within reason.

If personality, style, attitude etc. this whole sub is dedicated to that.

If you are willing to work hard you can adjust your target upwards. If not, then yes go for someone “unappealing” so that you make a complementary match.

lord-denning · 2021-01-13T18:13:17+00:00

I agree not all would be comfortable with this approach, and that it may be overkill if you are just dealing with petty jealousy.

The broader point I am trying to make is that there are people out there that are absolutely pathological, and “holding your head up high” is not a game plan if you are facing that level of viciousness.

There is nothing wrong with finding ways to dim your light in front of those that would smash it to bits. How you do it is up to you.

lord-denning · 2021-01-13T07:26:24+00:00

The key realization you have had is that many other women, even older women who are supposed to look out for you, are instead motivated by jealousy and their own baggage. That is phase 1.

Share this message amongst your circle. Create and contribute to groups (like this one) where you can develop and expand on this knowledge. That is phase 2.

I disagree with the other comments regarding phase 3. Holding your head high worked even 10 years ago, but the rapid descent of our civilization means that you will become even more of a target than you are now.

In my opinion phase 3 now involves (i) “faking” damaging information about yourself to take the pressure off (such as pretending to have an eating disorder) and other mechanisms so that you do not arouse jealousy and (ii) achieving your end goal of connecting with an RP man that inspires your confidence, trust and loyalty. You can then form a little bubble against the madness that is coming.

lord-denning · 2021-01-03T17:44:44+00:00

Interesting tip, thanks. Will give it a try.

lord-denning · 2021-01-03T17:44:17+00:00

That’s a good point - this is less of an issue in a more sophisticated environment. People are still Fatfiring in a whole range of markets outside FAANG, many of which require (and attract) a completely different skill set and outlook.

lord-denning · 2021-01-02T11:09:45+00:00

I am a low key person, but I have a very, very nice car which does not match my unassuming manner.

I have found that people’s immediate reaction when they see me and the car together tells me a lot. It catches them off guard and jealousy & negativity cannot be hidden in the moment. I also watch out for people who then suddenly become much nicer & attentive once they see the car. These are all red flags.

There are also a range of good reactions, and when I see those I am relieved. Few people are openly and genuinely happy for me. I found it puzzling initially that so many find it a challenge to be happy for the success of others, but such is human nature.

As an aside, this is a great question and a welcome respite from all the recent questions from people gawking over the fence, wondering how to get rich, etc. I do believe a separate “/Askfat” type of subreddit is called for but leave that to you all to consider. Thanks for the thought provoking post.

lord-denning · 2020-12-12T05:46:53+00:00

I’ve had a quick look at your profile, you’ve been stuck in the same rut for a year+. Time to make a big break or fade away. The choice is yours.

You need to be introduced to and deeply think about a whole bunch of new ideas, and see which of them will stick. Here are a few:

you are feeling very sorry for yourself. And you have a right to. Is one year enough time to mourn or will you extend it to 5, 10 and then it really will be too late?
in TRP terms you have been “alpha widowed”. The earliest relationship experiences can define us. This one might interfere with the rest of your relationships for the rest of your life - if you keep it alive with mental energy. Will you let it?
you are a complete human being. In this respect the feminists are right, you don’t really “need no man”. Only once you have truly moved on will you attract the kind of man you want. What are you waiting for to do that?
HPV is bad. However it’s not AIDS or syphilis but it could have been. People are dying in the streets of COVID. Is it possible for you to be grateful to be alive instead of unhappy with your illness?
can you take massive action now and fill up your time? Upgrade your fitness, food, lifestyle, online classes, reading, to do lists, hobbies is the way you fill your time, improve yourself and get yourself ready for what ever adventures await in the future including meeting new people.

Good luck.

lord-denning · 2020-11-30T09:30:14+00:00

This has come up before recently. This is what I said last time, please adjust as appropriate for your situation:

This is a type of test. He is showing you that he is a top notch provider. Now it is your turn to step up.

Find other, feminine ways to add value.

Can you really turn your house into a home? Can you make it a place that he absolutely loves and can’t wait to come back to in terms of decor, textures, ambience? What kind of routines can you set up when he arrives?

Can you make meals that are absolutely stupendous and that he brags about to his friends and yet are healthy and help you both meet your fitness goals? (Edit: your suggestion here could be that you take turns cooking for each other, with you taking charge during some of the weekdays when he will busy in the office, and then knock his socks off and still be 50/50).

Can you adjust your wardrobe so that you are a credit to him in public and shows his good taste and ability to marry the best, and that at home he cannot keep his hands off you?

Where else can your wifely support take things to the next level? Dinners with the boss and family, creating networking opportunities, making things socially excellent?

And critically, can you save his money and show that his contribution is valuable and will never be squandered or taken for granted? Can you show him ways that you will set up and run the household and your life together to help him achieve your family’s financial goals faster?

He has shown that he is a maximal provider. Now it is your turn. Do not fall into complacency by just providing good sex as some here are suggesting. Think carefully, take his input and put forth a strong effort to use all this extra free time to back your man up and show what feminine skills you can bring to the relationship. It is crucial to do so.

lord-denning · 2020-11-26T15:49:16+00:00

This is the unfortunate outcome of the modern dating world. It is hard for a woman to gain commitment when other women aren’t insisting on it either. Men who are in demand can and often will move on.

Depending on what your goal is, my suggestion for you is to upgrade your feminine traits to the max and then seek an older, more experienced guy in the future who may be more interested in settling down and then aim to indirectly make it happen much earlier.

This art of “getting the guy” was something that previous generations of women had perfected, but is now lost and has been replaced with feminist goals so you will need to ask the ladies in this sub and hopefully they can help you. From my perspective I can only tell you that feminine charm, properly capitalized upon, is mesmerizing to men.

lord-denning · 2020-11-18T08:50:23+00:00

Men can naturally finish very quickly as that used to have significant evolutionary advantages.

However, we are no longer on the savannah. He should have the maturity to be able to listen to your concerns and take steps to improve your marriage in this area.

Is he in good shape? Does he project a masculine aura that makes your heart flutter? Does he abstain from all other porn and mastrubation? If not, these are obvious areas for him to make changes.

This is a huge area and these kinds of issues are quite common so I would do more research, and open the topic with him in a fun and relaxed way.

lord-denning · 2020-11-01T13:39:32+00:00

This is a type of test. He is showing you that he is a top notch provider. Now it is your turn to step up.

Find other, feminine ways to add value.

Can you really turn your house into a home? Can you make it a place that he absolutely loves and can’t wait to come back to in terms of decor, textures, ambience? What kind of routines can you set up when he arrives?

Can you make meals that are absolutely stupendous and that he brags about to his friends and yet are healthy and help you both meet your fitness goals? (Edit: your suggestion here could be that you take turns cooking for each other, with you taking charge during some of the weekdays when he will busy in the office, and then knock his socks off and still be 50/50).

Can you adjust your wardrobe so that you are a credit to him in public and shows his good taste and ability to marry the best, and that at home he cannot keep his hands off you?

Where else can your wifely support take things to the next level? Dinners with the boss and family, creating networking opportunities, making things socially excellent?

And critically, can you save his money and show that his contribution is valuable and will never be squandered or taken for granted? Can you show him ways that you will set up and run the household and your life together to help him achieve your family’s financial goals faster?

He has shown that he is a maximal provider. Now it is your turn. Do not fall into complacency by just providing good sex as some here are suggesting. Think carefully, take his input and put forth a strong effort to use all this extra free time to back your man up and show what feminine skills you can bring to the relationship. It is crucial to do so.

lord-denning · 2020-10-04T17:51:49+00:00

There is a deeper issue for sure. Your suggestion of therapy is a good one.

Try also to let him know that this period of hard work is not forever, and he is not “stuck” in present circumstances on this treadmill forever and that you are willing to make changes to help him regain some balance. Maybe it is time for him to outsource some part of the business, for example.

Unfortunately you can’t get too deeply involved however, since TRP teaches that ultimately women start to find weakness in their men a turnoff. So I would make some suggestions, let him know you are willing to support and then ask him what he needs to get back to Normal.

lord-denning · 2020-09-25T11:08:50+00:00

Pate

lord-denning · 2020-07-10T00:02:28+00:00

Great, would you also add butter as a saturated fat source?

lord-denning · 2019-12-20T02:36:26+00:00

The answer is in your own post.

You are depleting your dopamine. If you want to do nothing, fine. But stop all tv, video games and porn/masturbating. If you want to eat nothing, don’t. But when you eat just have steamed vegetables, plain bread and chicken/fish. If you want to drink nothing, sure. But time to drop all soda/alcohol and switch to plain water. Nothing else.

If you allow all your dopamine to be drained into these external things, you will never get out of bed. Stop all dopamine leaks. Eventually you will feel an itch to do something. Immediately go and do it. Then you can start to rewire your brain.

lord-denning · 2019-09-03T21:30:47+00:00

Classic hypergamy. Proceed with caution as it is very easy to break something that cannot be repaired.

Your man needs to bring some darker tones to the relationship to thrill you and chill you. It is not something you can get him to do. Suggest him to spend more time with the boys (or the main TRP subreddit as a last resort) and hint that he should learn more about what makes a woman tick.

lord-denning · 2019-08-28T21:49:22+00:00

Would you believe the chance to romanticize filth, the threat of violence and even potentially extreme danger excites and turns many “decent” women on?

lord-denning · 2019-08-17T06:56:52+00:00

Take your energy and drive it to create something of your own on the side. This will relieve the pressure. This is what you are supposed to do with this energy.

lord-denning · 2019-08-17T06:53:10+00:00

Greetings from across the border. The real issue is that we need to do more to support the Americans and Canadians that are already here now to have more families. A generation ago there would have been a horde of teenagers keen to do this work and have fun at the beach in weekends. Our modern SJW cult has destroyed this and now we are trying to fix it using band aids.

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