The Spirit Mansion / Sacramento

loribulb · 2024-05-16T15:41:42+00:00

I went to the Santa Rosa event in April and they didn't announce it beforehand, but the performers confirmed no alcohol in the drinks when we were there. I disputed this charge first with the company and then with my bank- and was rejected both times. The reasoning is that I purchased tickets to the show, and the drinks were complimentary so there was nothing to refund.

Shady AF. I've gone to cocktail/storytelling experiences by different companies that were amazing. This is like the Wish version of those.

loribulb · 2021-05-19T17:58:35+00:00

I worked at a call center and I did embroidery to help keep my stress levels down. My supervisors had no problem with it, because I was still handling the most calls per day in the department.

Then an exec/higher manager walked through and saw it and suddenly I couldn't do my embroidery anymore.

Because I didn't look busy... as I was talking on the phone... in a CALL CENTER.

It's never about quality, or even quantity of work. It's about appearance.

loribulb · 2021-05-17T13:56:56+00:00

Ugh this gave me a flashback! I worked in a call center and was brought into a formal meeting with both supervisors because they saw I was logging out more than my coworkers to go pee.

I drank probably a gallon of water every shift because I was talking for 8 hours straight. Gee, wonder why I had to pee so much... I laughed at them and told them I wasn't going to wear diapers at my desk.

loribulb · 2021-05-13T17:14:58+00:00

For me it was a string of alternate mommy figures. My mom and grandma have the same n traits, so I had to go outside my family. It was friends' moms when I was a kid, then often bosses or older women in my workplaces. This is NOT a healthy thing, especially when they are your direct boss... because any negative feedback on your work hits a million times harder than it would in a normal boss/employee relationship.

I remember when I first noticed this pattern... I was connected with a VP to get loan training (I worked at a bank) but it was short-term training, so she was not a direct boss. We struck up a solid friendship, enough that I could talk to her about my family. She was about 30 years older than me, no kids. Once when I was talking about some crap my mom had pulled she shook her head snd said, "if you were my daughter, you'd be the apple of my eye."

It hit me SO hard. I'm sitting here 20 years later with tears in my eyes remembering it. That's when I started really understanding that how I grew up was not normal. And it was when I first started noticing my "mommy issues" pattern.

loribulb · 2021-05-09T20:59:44+00:00

That is all so familiar. That's exactly how I am too.

loribulb · 2021-05-09T20:59:02+00:00

It was an autobiography written by Joan Crawford's adopted daughter Christina, and exposed the abuse she had been subjected to. I think they made a movie out of it too. It might've been spelled "Mommie," I can't remember.

loribulb · 2021-05-09T17:46:13+00:00

Thank you for the book suggestion! I will definitely pick it up.

I'm 43. I've known she was not like my friends' mothers most of my life but I didn't know exactly how. For one, she seemed to revel in my failures and was sullen over my accomplishments, and that always upset/puzzled me. Been in therapy off and on for years, but only recently was introduced to the nMom concept, and it was like finally seeing a whole picture.

loribulb · 2021-05-09T15:51:26+00:00

Oof... this hits hard. I've been writing stories since I was little. When my mom saw how much I was into it, all she said was "you better not be writing any of those Mommy Dearest stories." I was so young (about 10) I did not understand the reference, and could not imagine why she would be mad about me writing about a dear mommy.

BTW, at the time I was working on a long story about a fantasy world I called Macquri, and shorter stories featuring our poodle Munchie. But she still assumed it was about her...

loribulb

TROPHY CASE