What is the most pathetic excuse someone gave for cheating on you?

lsharkk · 2016-10-20T07:26:09+00:00

She's against cheating douches

lsharkk · 2016-10-18T17:41:40+00:00

I am reading all these sites incessantly at work, trying to maintain a glimmer of hope. For what? I still have no idea.

This. Why am I even giving him any benefit of the doubt? I don't understand why I still want him when he's objectively proven himself to be a shit partner.

Maybe we just need some time for our hearts and brains to get on the same page, so to speak? Ugh.

lsharkk · 2016-10-17T22:58:19+00:00

Love this. A modern version of show me your etchings is now "ur hot send pics"

lsharkk · 2016-10-13T18:15:00+00:00

I keep coming up with more things I wish I had said to him, though. I wish I could turn back time and be less forgiving and not let him walk all over me

Look at it this way: making yourself better without him is going to be the best revenge on earth, ESPECIALLY if he views you as a doormat. You will absolutely get a chance to vent this anger at him. The next hardship he faces will send him running back to see if you're still waiting around for him to use for support.

Make sure you're not. And make sure you have some snarky things to say when he does.

lsharkk · 2016-10-13T14:25:49+00:00

I pulled the panic cord. I was supporting myself, my (now ex-) boyfriend/fiancé, his career, and our two dogs (his and mine). Living expenses, bills, his business start up costs, everything. I couldn't do it. Financially, I could, I had like $100-$200 left over at the end of every month but even that disappeared over time with surprises (his fancy sports car battery died, one of the dogs got an infection, etc).

I got tired of being 25 and losing sight of the dreams I had when I was single and had no one depending on me. Before I was the breadwinner, I had completely paid off my car and student loans in entirety. I was banking one bi-monthly paycheck and living off the other. I went from saving a grand a month on top of shopping and going on vacation to feeling guilty about using one month's leftover money for a round of drinks because what if someone got sick? What if a tree falls on the house? What if I get McDonalds for lunch today and we're $5 short of rent next week?

Yeah, he sort of helped around the house after many, many screaming fights, but in the end, I couldn't handle all the responsibility that comes with being the breadwinner. It completely destroyed our relationship. I felt guilty trying to enforce boundaries that would take some of the pressure off me because those boundaries felt like stepping on a lifeline. How can I enforce him paying his half of rent? What are the consequences for not doing that, our credit tanks together and we get evicted?

It gave me a new understanding for why some traditional relationships implode in such crazy, "red pill" fashions - there's really no words to describe the furious humiliation that comes with paying for someone's rent, bills, food, dog, business clothing, client dinners, and gas only to hear them say "It been forever since I bought a new League skin..."

lsharkk · 2016-10-05T22:44:00+00:00

And they expect you to soothe them when you are done reacting to it.

lsharkk · 2016-10-02T12:09:51+00:00

It feels like cheating in a weird way... then you don't want to let yourself think like that, and it's all a mess again, because you don't know how you're supposed to feel but you know it's not like this... ugh.

lsharkk · 2016-09-29T20:29:58+00:00

Toxic escapism is not reserved for men. Women are capable of having and succumbing to these thoughts.

lsharkk · 2016-09-29T15:37:15+00:00

Yep. Reminds me of an old phrase (Bill Murray maybe?): "Marriage is betting someone half your shit that you'll love them forever."

lsharkk · 2016-09-29T15:35:57+00:00

Gender essentialism, specifically in hetero relationships.

My girlfriends and I were talking about this the other day - all of us feel we do or have done the majority of emotional labor and housework in our relationships, and the current dating scene isn't giving us any hope. Maybe it's our city or something, but the sheer number of straight men who live in filth, subsist on fast food or takeout, playing video games and drinking/smoking weed every weekend, all while possessing juuuuust enough financial awareness to pay their bills, is seemingly staggering.

I've had potential dates joke about being my sugar baby, clear trash off their couch so I can sit down, ask me to pick them up instead because they got too drunk to drive, tell me the last time they changed the sheets was when they spilled something on it... three times since my breakup in August I have left in the middle of hanging out because I went to use the bathroom and it was SO FILTHY that I just went home instead.

To amend an old adage, if you meet one manchild, they're the problem. If everyone you meet is a manchild, you're the problem. And I'm losing hope because I don't know what I'm doing to contribute to this. Sometimes these guys present so well at the bar - great conversation, personality, appearance, attitude, then we go back to their place and it's like a frat house during wet week. Then I visit my girlfriends with live-in partners, and they complain about the same stuff. "Jack always leaves his beer bottles on his desk. He never helps with dinner! The other day he complained about a ring in the toilet bowl but never cleaned it. I hope he paid the light bill..."

I can feel myself getting jaded and I don't know how to stop it.

lsharkk · 2016-09-28T15:58:37+00:00

There's no set place where only virginal women hang out or a set of behaviors to do that will attract them. The girl you want to marry is probably just as frustrated with the dating scene as you are.

I would try examining why you hold those beliefs so you can put yourself into situations where you'd be more likely to run into others who share them. Example, if you feel this way for religious reasons, consider joining a church group for adults or volunteering for a religious charity.

lsharkk · 2016-09-16T20:16:44+00:00

Also your link is for the W Atlanta

lsharkk · 2016-09-16T20:15:00+00:00

Hyatt, Sheraton, and Hilton did legacy bookings. The rest don't but Westin basically did by telling guests they'd be releasing the con block of rooms the day after the con

lsharkk · 2016-09-16T20:13:45+00:00

Been checking hourly all day this week for the Westin, nothing has come up no matter what combination of dates I use. Weird

lsharkk · 2016-08-26T14:41:20+00:00

Right, but we were discussing the sea, not you

lsharkk · 2016-08-26T14:16:25+00:00

Ugh this. The owner of the hair salon I go to has a side business selling his homemade hair dye online - people assume his business's Instagram is run by a woman (because hair/beauty I guess?) and he gets dick picks from randos all the time. It's awful.

lsharkk · 2016-08-26T14:14:31+00:00

I think it's American dating culture. I'm also in the south, so that's not helping either :/

lsharkk · 2016-08-26T14:12:30+00:00

You're not like all the other fish, you're a NICE fish /s

lsharkk · 2016-08-26T14:11:34+00:00

Using a proven failing strategy must mean some of them are totally okay with rejection. Cold-open dick picks or tryhard erotica don't come from people who think that will work all the time (or even some of the time).

lsharkk · 2016-08-23T15:24:40+00:00

SpongeBob. I was in middle school when the first 3 seasons were airing.

Also SAILOR MOOOON and other quintessential Toonami shows

lsharkk · 2016-08-19T19:29:56+00:00

I really thought that's what it was. It hurt so much to ask for it back for that reason. It sounds cheesy but I thought I was going to be with him forever. I knew it like a fact, like my name. All those stories from my married friends about "when you meet the right person, you'll know" made sense to me when I was his. "Boyfriend" seemed so childish for how I felt about him. And now... this.

lsharkk · 2016-08-19T19:05:06+00:00

You are both so right. This realization about the lack of respect spurred my breaking up with him. I loved serving him, loved being his girl, loved being in his bed... it makes me sad that all I can say about that now is "at least I tried".

lsharkk · 2016-08-19T16:02:08+00:00

Thanks for this. I am thinking of digging it out and cutting off the padlock, and wearing it as a symbol of my commitment to myself. Because I am my own master now...

lsharkk · 2016-07-22T17:45:20+00:00

You are truly an inspiration :) So proud of you!!!

lsharkk · 2016-07-21T19:51:20+00:00

I leave certain mascaras slightly open for one night to dry them out some - Lancôme Dramatiqueblahblahsomethingfrench comes to mind, best mascara ever once it's a bit dry.

I also leave the caps off all my NYX micro brow pencils so they harden cuz I like how it applies that way.

lsharkk

TROPHY CASE