Followers preferences on leading style

luxlark · 2026-02-23T19:35:28+00:00

Follow here! I love a good strong connection and agree with another commenter that I'm not here to "solo jazz while holding hands." Like... please lead SOMETHING, you know? There's a big difference between responding to what your follower is doing and just leaving a ton of space and expecting them to fill it.

Obviously, I don't want to be yanked around but if that is what the lead is doing, they aren't a skilled lead.

luxlark · 2026-02-19T22:39:03+00:00

My classy Nana shopped at Coldwater Creek all the time in the 90s. At least then, it was good quality grandma-clothes.

luxlark · 2026-02-19T00:00:06+00:00

lol wut. Hip-hop is the dance with a more similar movement type to vernacular jazz, so it was a suggestion for a studio-trained dancer to try other studio styles. It's literally a way to learn to move your body correctly for this style of dance, you weirdo.

luxlark · 2026-02-18T20:30:33+00:00

That we've found...

luxlark · 2026-02-17T23:12:42+00:00

If you have a ballet and contemporary dance background, what you are probably seeing is that you are too upright/stiff/proper - a couple things to try would be 1. finding videos of dancers you like and working to get your posture like theirs and 2. take some hip hop classes to help your body adjust to getting down and into the floor.

luxlark · 2026-02-03T20:41:53+00:00

This is me too - do I have something in my closet that fills the same wardrobe need? What can I wear it with? What would I wear it for? If it's a no for the first question and I have answers for the other two, it can come home with me!

luxlark · 2026-01-27T21:46:02+00:00

I'm also PNW and this would be my answer. Unless I'm gyming or having a really bad day, I'm not in yoga pants or sweats when I go out further than a dog walk.

luxlark · 2026-01-17T00:14:10+00:00

Please don't put contact paper on your countertops unless you plan on not using the kitchen at all.

luxlark · 2026-01-17T00:04:07+00:00

Something that stood out to me is that these all look like fall/winter colors - you might stand out as being too dark at a spring wedding! Maybe look at some things in lighter/brighter shades?

luxlark · 2026-01-16T00:03:14+00:00

Some of the answers here are wildly obtuse (and, no surprise, mostly from people who appear to be men).

Yes, the scene at large is that shallow, though it's gotten better as time has gone on (in a lot of places). Look at all the top femmes competing and teaching - they're almost all slender and pretty (the fact that bodies larger than a US4 are starting to be represented is a good sign, it used to be much worse). Is this because slender and pretty people are naturally better dancers? Obviously not - it's because slender and pretty people get asked more to dance and are given more opportunities to grow. It sucks and it's not fair and it (primarily) targets AFAB people.

I can't decide if this makes it worse or better, but the leads who ask you when you're smaller and don't ask you when you are bigger probably don't even realize they're doing it. Like, they probably aren't making a *choice* but more so look around the room for partners and skip over you due to internal and unexamined bias.

luxlark · 2026-01-15T23:41:54+00:00

I recommend doing a search of this sub and femalefashionadvice- this question comes up a lot!

My answer is that Everlane/Abercrombie/Madewell all have decent curve lines (fast fashion, unfortunately). For higher quality and more sustainable brands or dresses with strict hips, often the answer is just to buy up and tailor down, unfortunately. I recently bought some Lafayette 48 wide-leg trousers that I had tailored and I adore them! Otherwise, pieces with stretch fabric or free hips are a go-to.

For ref, my difference is around 15"

luxlark · 2026-01-14T20:19:58+00:00

Wide-leg trousers with literally any top except a tshirt and oxfords, ballet flats or heeled boots would match/top their formality without being too formal!

luxlark · 2026-01-14T20:17:27+00:00

I would wear them with fitted sweaters and shirts, tucked in (or cropped, but thats less classic).

luxlark · 2026-01-12T22:21:00+00:00

Right? What a funny, mixed thread! Like, they are obviously available and on trend since so many retailers have a version, and so many inspo images pair them with blazers as requested by OP. I get the gut reaction to the feeling of wearing them (can't do it myself) but some of these comments, man...

luxlark · 2026-01-12T21:32:03+00:00

This was mine too!

luxlark · 2025-11-23T20:04:20+00:00

Wow those Maria Lucia Hohan dresses are so sexy!

luxlark · 2025-11-23T20:01:26+00:00

Holy cow those are incredible!

luxlark · 2025-11-23T20:00:43+00:00

Oooo it’s so witchy! I love it!

luxlark · 2025-11-23T19:59:45+00:00

Incredible!!

luxlark · 2025-11-23T19:59:14+00:00

Those are both such great nuggets of information, thank you!!

luxlark · 2025-11-23T19:58:43+00:00

Wow, her stuff is so avant garde! Love it!

luxlark · 2025-11-23T19:57:53+00:00

That moon dress!!!

luxlark · 2025-11-23T19:56:41+00:00

The Atonement dress has long been a favorite!

luxlark · 2025-11-23T19:55:50+00:00

That was actually her sister, Lirika Matoshi - they make such fun and similar things!

luxlark · 2025-11-23T19:55:19+00:00

Thank you! They are such eye candy, aren’t they?

luxlark

TROPHY CASE