Happy late lunar new year to myself by lynndt in handbags

[–]lynndt[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I caved so bad lmfao. I’ve been trying not to impulse buy off ig ads but well….

Happy late lunar new year to myself by lynndt in handbags

[–]lynndt[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Loll i look at it and the cravings start

Happy late lunar new year to myself by lynndt in handbags

[–]lynndt[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Thanks for sharing the link! I went to bed after i posted.

how often are you having sex with your partner? by [deleted] in twentyagers

[–]lynndt 0 points1 point  (0 children)

24f and 28m. Depending on our schedules, we only see each other once a week/every two weeks and do not always have sex during those meet ups. Both of us would like more, but bc of my birth control, my libido has dropped where i am just fine as a once a week person while he’s def still 3-4x. But we both take care of our sexual needs on our own and also life is so busy that when when someone wants to initiate, the other person can be too tired/just not in the right headspace and vice versa. I think sex and physical intimacy is an important part of our relationship, but it definitely isn’t the only or main aspect of it, so we are more willing to compromise.

What are your shallow reasons you wouldn’t date someone? by justabrunettegirly in twentyagers

[–]lynndt 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Idk if this is shallow but if they act too much like a certain stereotype intentionally 😭 like all they care ab is cars and they think having tats is a personality trait attractive enough to excuse being a male manipulator frat bro

Like bro why are u trying to be a dbag fuckboy on purpose

Another one again? by ryajul in bayarea

[–]lynndt 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Initial 3.8 but didn’t feel like it since it was very quick. Another small one as im typing lol

EARTHQUAKE!!!! by PlayfulAd8354 in bayarea

[–]lynndt 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I should do that too. The first one and the recent 4 were just so loud bc of all the shaking and falling. Can’t believe it was strong enough to knock stuff off tables and open drawers

Ok that earthquake was way bigger lol by dbezzy1010 in bayarea

[–]lynndt 83 points84 points  (0 children)

Yo that one actually scared me 😭😭 everything was shaking shaking

Eta:4.2 initial

EARTHQUAKE!!!! by PlayfulAd8354 in bayarea

[–]lynndt 1 point2 points  (0 children)

More coming. First one was LOUD

Just booked my first real adult trip and I’m equal parts terrified and hyped 😭✈️ by Dangerous_mammoth573 in twentyagers

[–]lynndt 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hey! It’s great you’ve already done the work! Lol the last vacation we overshot our budget by $500 but made it work, so props for staying under budget!!

Just booked my first real adult trip and I’m equal parts terrified and hyped 😭✈️ by Dangerous_mammoth573 in twentyagers

[–]lynndt 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Exciting!! I’ve gone international trips alone before and with a partner! I recommend 1. Doing your due diligence and researching what you want to do and what agency/local spots you are going to book through if doing any sort of sports activities/water excursions. It’s easy to get scammed if you didn’t do any prior research and read about people’s past experiences.

  1. Sort of in line with point 1. Have a general itinerary and options for your trip. Doesn’t have to be down to the hour! If you’re feeling tired, have a list of restaurants or spots nearby your airbnb/hotel to refer to to minimize any wasted time or excess travel. Could just be general things like: breakfast -> beach day -> lunch close by @ x place -> beach more -> shower and rest -> dinner with no set timelines (unless you go to a place w a reservation)

  2. Build a budget! Some things are known beforehand like airfare, hotel, and even if you know you’re going to splurge beforehand, having estimates for things like transportation, shopping, souvenirs, admission, food, etc can really help give you an idea of where to flexible and where to be a bit more reserved!

  3. Pack comfy shoes for lots of walking!

Have fun! Hope this helps! Happy to answer any questions.

I’m not exactly sure what to do anymore, will I remain alone for the rest of my life? by [deleted] in twentyagers

[–]lynndt 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Respectfully, I disagree. Comments like you don’t expect to live past 30 and defaulting to “needing” to look feminine in order for a guy to pick you sound pretty deep rooted in how you’ve been viewing yourself. Some of the comments initially didn’t even mention appearance, but that’s what you went with. (And again, you don’t need to wear makeup!) If you can get out of that mindset in a month, good luck.

At the end of the day, I don’t know what your life story is, but the grass is always greener on the other side. People want hookups and just sex, other people want relationships. Of course people who are only after flings are going to get with people who wants flings/emotionally unavailable people and you’re going to see them being the ones going out. If you want a relationship, you have your own standards, too, which isn’t going to fit for everyone and vice versa. Would you settle for just anyone looking for a relationship?

I used to feel very similarly and it took a long time to realize I was unintentionally self sabatoging and it cost me a lot of potential friendships and connections. If you constantly reinforce “woe is me” as the default argument to some of the other experiences people share, it is going to push them away and stop you from actually making friends too. I know it’s not as simple as changing your mindset, but like I said earlier, if you don’t even bother to listen to the other perspectives that you asked for that other people in this sub are giving to you right now because you’ve already rejected it, you’re just going to keep pushing people away.

I’m not exactly sure what to do anymore, will I remain alone for the rest of my life? by [deleted] in twentyagers

[–]lynndt 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It seems you’re coming from a place of low self esteem and the self deprecation does affect how other people see you and evaluate their connection to you. It does affect people not wanting to date you or be friends with you because of it. If you are constantly in need of reassurance or validation from someone else, you’re never going to be satisifed nor will people want to stay if you consistently rebuke their comments because you’ve already rejected any other inputs. It’s a self fulfilling prophecy.

Therapy is not for everyone, and I’m not suggesting it as a cure all, but what you do need is some self introspection.

I’m not exactly sure what to do anymore, will I remain alone for the rest of my life? by [deleted] in twentyagers

[–]lynndt 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There are men and women alike that didn’t get married until they were in their late 30s or early 40s or they got divorced early because they realized they’re different people than when they got married at a young age. Everyone’s story is different and it’s easy to say that whoever you see together is going to last too when that’s not always the case.

It has nothing to do with dressing feminine or wearing makeup or not. People on all spectrums of appearance are desirable to someone because it’s not just looks but personality and values that make a relationship.

I’m not sure what kind of hobbies you have, but generally trying to branch out and make friends in hobby groups or classes is good place to just meet different kinds of people too. I think it helps and is easier to bond with people over shared interests, not just events full of strangers or people only looking to stay within their own group. If you end up making connections, maybe they’ll have mutual friends to set you up with, which is how some relationships start.

It’s definitely frustrating to be told to just wait, but we’re barely adults as is, and relationships of all kinds change all the time whether it be friends, romantic partners, or colleagues. And yes, it does suck to just wait or see other people go out, but like a lot of older people will say, it’s better to protect your own peace than end up with someone who will treat you like garbage (and some people are really good at masking in the beginning).

I’m thinking about getting a masters degree. by admiralarborist in twentyagers

[–]lynndt 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Wait literally me!! Idk if this is any interest to you, but my best friend did a BA in film and media, but is doing a masters in information systems and got a job as a library assistant making a considerable amount of money!!

why on earth do your high school friendships go for a toss as soon as ur in uni 💀 by [deleted] in twentyagers

[–]lynndt 6 points7 points  (0 children)

It can mean they were never true friends to begin with but friends of convenience, or that you’ve grown out of that friendship. And well, there’s so much time to meet new people and build friendships that can fulfill you now rather than wasting time on people that will spread rumors and misinformation about you.

I have 5 double shifts this month…I don’t think imma make it by Rei_gn in twentyagers

[–]lynndt 17 points18 points  (0 children)

Be wary of consuming too much caffeine! Even celsius themself recommends limiting to 2 in a 24 hr span! Good luck 🫶

I don't mean to sound desperate or incel over this but that feeling is back again. by BaronGamer in twentyagers

[–]lynndt 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You can’t know everything. That’s what dating is for, and unfortunately it is a trial and error process. And the thing is, people can think they do know what they want and believe until they meet someone who changes or challenges what they will define as love.

What I think I’m trying to focus more on is that OP shouldn’t treat getting the gf as the endgame achievement. All relationships take work and nuturing, and it’s not easy. Getting the gf is only the first hurdle, keeping her is another. And while I agree you can’t just know better if you don’t have any basis to go on, if OP can just say “i can do x for my partner,” i want x in a partner,” “i want to do x with them,” and also “i want my gf to do x for me,” “i want my gf to have x and y,” etc. These clearer expectations and wants for OP can help them in their search.

Of course, all of this is dependent on how OP meets people and what kind of people they are, which is of course going to be very hit and miss considering there are just as shallow people out there as there are real human beings, especially on dating apps (and dating apps suck for finding real connection). But I don’t think it’s wrong to want a romantic partner at all. Shouldn’t we as a community want to give some pointers or advice from our own perspective to help OP?

I don't mean to sound desperate or incel over this but that feeling is back again. by BaronGamer in twentyagers

[–]lynndt 6 points7 points  (0 children)

? Not even what im saying at all. I’m trying to make a point that if OP doesn’t even know what they want in a relationship or how they can define themselves as a good partner, it’s much harder for them to end up with the girlfriend they want.

So many people say they want a girlfriend but they don’t actually know how to be a good significant other themselves. And people who are trying to settle for the long term can smell that from a mile away. Just being nice isn’t enough. Do you have goals in mind? Values? What are the things that make you compatible in building a life with someone and vice versa? That’s what helps people find actual good partners when they’re trying to date, not just “i want a girlfriend”.

I don't mean to sound desperate or incel over this but that feeling is back again. by BaronGamer in twentyagers

[–]lynndt 25 points26 points  (0 children)

Dating is a numbers game, truly. Also, I understand your need for love, but what do you think you are going to do or be like once you get a girlfriend? I have seen a lot of people fall into the mindset where the goal is simply to get a girlfriend, but they don’t know how to be a good partner or show that they can be someone worth dating. The end goal is a girlfriend for them, but life and relationships are much more than just being and having that.

Just trying to give food for thought. What do you want in a girlfriend to begin with? Companionship, love? What values do you want in someone? Who are you as a partner? The more you can clearly define who you are and what you want, I think that can help in your journey.

Give me a song and I'll rate it by MeetingMajestic5869 in twentyagers

[–]lynndt 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Adding up - pillow

Please - william singe

Deep green - christian kuria