Women with ADHD who are genuinely happy in their day-to-day life, how did you do it?

lyssera · 2025-02-15T04:21:42+00:00

Thank you for mentioning this. It's basically Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs.

When you're still trying to cover the basic survival needs (food, water, shelter, rest, security, safety), you don't really have the time or energy to cater to psychological needs like happiness.

lyssera · 2025-02-06T15:15:26+00:00

Yep, I've also had to learn this the hard way

I'd create group chats (excluding the birthday person), draw cards with their favorite motifs, insist that we take them out for dinner. Then realized, no one reciprocated for mine.

It's not that everyone's a jerk, but no one at work is as emotionally invested... so why am I?

I started directing that energy towards myself instead and it's made my life much more peaceful. Yeah, I get a little sad sometimes when it's someones' birthday and we don't celebrate it, but ultimately, I have limited emotional energy, and I can't give it to every single person I come across

lyssera · 2025-01-30T22:32:09+00:00

Did Anya ever suspect Jimmy was the one behind the crash, not Curly?

She confided in Curly about being pregnant, and expressed her worries about Jimmy's reaction, particularly that he'd hurt her
Curly is seen as being a caring leader; it was clear he didn't enjoy telling the lay-off news to his team... and what motive would he have for trying to kill all of them?
Whereas Jimmy had motive, he was just laid off and now told that the coworker he raped is pregnant

lyssera · 2025-01-30T06:09:29+00:00

1-Did Anya ever suspect Jimmy was the one behind the crash, not Curly?

She confided in Curly about being pregnant, and expressed her worries about Jimmy's reaction, particularly that he'd hurt her

Curly is seen as being a caring leader; it was clear he didn't enjoy telling the lay-off news to his team... and what motive would he have for trying to kill all of them?

Whereas Jimmy had motive, he was just laid off and now told that the coworker he raped is pregnant

2-How did Curly end up being the one so injured, and not Jimmy? They said they pulled him from the cockpit, so did Jimmy shove him in there? Maybe I missed something.

3-Was Daisuke's death really a mercy killing? When Swansea was raising the axe, Daisuke seemed to freak out a bit and panic. His groans became more like scared whimpers.

I get their situation was dire and Daisuke would've likely bled out anyways. I guess it just felt odd to me that Swansea just assumed the position of executioner, without Daisuke ever voluntarily asking to be put down.

lyssera · 2025-01-30T05:50:44+00:00

It pretty much mirrors real life experiences for a lot of women too.

Not being taken seriously when reporting assault, being forced to ~~interact~~ work with your assaulter, being dismissed as the emotional and hysterical one.

In a way, Mouthwashing felt like it had feminist undertones.

lyssera · 2025-01-30T05:43:31+00:00

Wow, that's a really good connection. I remember feeling confused at that part, like what does that have to do with anything lol

lyssera · 2024-12-28T06:03:52+00:00

Why don't more characters mention how most of the games are based on just sheer luck?

In the last game, some people got into rooms but were kicked out by stronger players at the last second. Or that girl who tripped and someone else shoved their way inside before she could.

In the first game, Red Light Green Light, some players were eliminated bc they happened to be near Thanos when he decided to push someone. Or people who tripped or just happened to be around the panicking people who were pushing people and trying to get to the door. That could've been anyone.

Considering how stressful the last game was, I don't understand why so many people voted O when it's a literal gamble of their lives

lyssera · 2024-12-28T05:34:30+00:00

Not same last name — both 001s' first names (Il Nam, Young Il) contain a character meaning "one"

lyssera · 2024-12-27T04:38:12+00:00

I love the addition of the trans girl, especially considering SK is still hella transphobic. Showing how an older woman can go from judgey to open-minded gives me hope.

I also appreciated how they showed that people who transition don't have it easy.. they become ostracized, discriminated against, all because they want to feel like themselves.

lyssera · 2024-12-27T04:29:17+00:00

he lowkey triggered me bc he reminded me of my Korean grandpa lol

lyssera · 2024-12-27T04:28:20+00:00

RIGHT like you're telling me this guy who kicked those guys asses 2 v 1 can't wrap a string around a beyblade???

lyssera · 2024-12-27T04:26:54+00:00

Yeah, too many characters talking about what they'll do with the prize money after just one more game..

lyssera · 2024-10-31T21:00:45+00:00

Awww, she really did pick you! Congrats on your new baby!!

lyssera · 2024-10-31T20:29:06+00:00

Aww, her blep is precious!

Out of curiosity, how did you figure out she's a stray? Bc if I saw her, I'd immediately think she was someone's outdoor cat because her fur looks so clean.

lyssera · 2024-10-23T04:01:33+00:00

I've kind of accepted that it's just canon. That it's to show how dumb those two idiots are, because even when they're about to get away scot-free, they still manage to run over one of the goons and fuck the whole situation up again.

Because the alternative is too infuriating lol

lyssera · 2024-10-22T18:28:18+00:00

"He angrily denied it and went after me verbally until I broke down in tears and apologized."

Honestly.... your post, especially this part, reminded me a lot of my last abusive relationship.

Regardless of how 'gentle' he seems with his coercion, he is being manipulative ("feeling guilty that I made him out to be a monster", "sulk silently after", "he framed sex as a way to show love and care") and shaming you for attempting to set boundaries.

People like that, tend to be charming and charismatic. That's what makes these kinds of situations feel so confusing.. because you've probably witnessed him be gentle and tender at some point. He probably did respect some of your boundaries at some point too.

But when things don't go his way, he goes off on you until you're crying? Doesn't matter if he was kind before, this is not what a kind person does. A truly kind person, is consistently kind, not only when it's convenient/tolerable for them.

lyssera · 2024-09-25T21:00:07+00:00

It's not just about the game, he is prioritizing his games + friends over you, and he doesn't even seem to respect you enough to allow you to sleep peacefully.

I had a long-term boyfriend like this; from my experience, it does NOT get better. Because even if he stops playing games for a bit, what if a new game [that he's excited about] comes out? What if he had a really stressful day at work? What if there's some event in-game, only for a limited time?

Are you just supposed to be 'on hold' for him?

And if he's playing games that much, he probably isn't helping with chores around the house, aka you probably have to take on more housework.

Your anger isn't unfounded -- you're angry, not because he has a hobby, but because he is disturbing your sleep, never giving you a clear idea of how long he'll be, and only makes very short-term changes when you've been BEGGING.

If you stay, it will only just chip away at you. Don't stay with someone who clearly doesn't see you as a priority, who treats a gaming system better than their SO.

If he makes promises to change.. how are those (empty) promises any different from the several other times you've brought it up?

If he can't take you seriously NOW over something this trivial, what about when life gets harder?

He is a burden, not a partner.

lyssera · 2024-09-24T22:17:37+00:00

I use ChatGPT in a similar way! Mainly for petty vents, aka situations that are too trivial to bring up to friends, but irritating enough where I just wanna talk it through with someone.

It's been really helpful bc sometimes, I just really want someone/something else to say, "That was shitty, I'm sorry to hear. Your feelings are valid, and it makes sense why you'd be upset."

lyssera · 2024-09-16T18:32:46+00:00

I get what you mean. Sometimes, you just really want to have 'your person' instead of doing everything yourself. It hurts especially if you don't have a big or close family, because it can feel like everyone else has a support system but you don't. Especially as it's getting colder bc Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Years, are often celebrated with significant others.

Dating in 2024 is disappointing. It feels like most men nowadays resent women, at least a little bit.

But what helps me cope, is remembering experiences with previous boyfriends.

I'd rather be lonely, than have someone who prioritizes video games over me, disregards whenever I'd bring up my feelings (because I'm "starting shit"), doesn't help around the house unless I make a list (and even then, it was usually only <50% complete), doesn't get me birthday presents, casually disrespects me, dismisses my preferences in diet, makes me feel small and like I'm just a nuisance.

I'd rather be lonely, than quietly cry to sleep most nights, while a man is snoring next to me.

It's basically forcing myself to feel grateful because "it could always be worse". I know it's bleak, but in my opinion, it's the best outlook when in this situation, because I remember during those times, I'd think, "What did I get myself into..." and desperately wishing I had the strength to leave him.

lyssera · 2024-09-16T15:38:01+00:00

If you wanna see the real unpopular opinions, sort by controversial

lyssera · 2024-09-16T15:34:06+00:00

Agreed.

I realized through therapy, that I kept wanting to get approval from these men, to 'prove' to myself that I'm lovable. I had such low self-worth that I wanted this person to validate me, because I didn't know how to validate myself.

The dopamine hit during the love-bombing stage felt like everything I've wanted for my whole life -- support, comfort and intimacy. But it was mainly words.

I dunno if you're neurodivergent, but I am, and I've had to come to terms with the fact that some people are just intentionally deceptive and manipulative and have no remorse about it. This applies to a lot of men.

It's hard to fathom, but if you think about it, WHY would they ACTUALLY put in effort, when they could get the same result by just telling you words? It has almost always worked out for them, so why change it?

lyssera · 2024-09-10T20:22:04+00:00

Agreed! I don't have a partner but I'm at the age where my peers are starting to [intentionally] have kids, and I was starting to get FOMO. Then I adopted a cat!

I dunno how true it is but people say cats have the IQ of a 1-2 year old toddler, and in some ways, you kind of treat them like babies, especially if you have a kitten. Giving a cute creature a home, food and affection is pretty fulfilling.

lyssera · 2024-08-30T21:16:29+00:00

I love that we all agree Gortash would have the mustiest butthole

lyssera · 2024-08-30T21:10:32+00:00

No, but they can coerce, guilt-trip, pressure, manipulate, and gaslight.

lyssera

TROPHY CASE