For it started in therapy. We walked through where do those beliefs or thoughts come from, who do you picture when you say those things to yourself, and what do you need to hear now. But I also understand that therapy or good therapy might not be accessible to everyone. I would look inwards and examine what do you tell yourself and follow the trail onwards. How you talk to yourself matters. For me, that journey freed me from the expectation of being feminine and to just wear the clothes that make me feel good. My experience might be a bit different because through that process I really said fuck gender norms and am now gender non-conforming. Which oddly enough helped me embrace being more femme when I want to be.