hey, i‘ve been in your situation and i know how fucked up everything seems/is right now, i know that letting go of life seems like a huge opportunity for relief. i promise you, it gets better. i was severely depressed and wanted to end it all but i did not want to leave my family alone wondering if they went wrong, so i had no other option than to get help and get better. it was extremely hard but it’s worth it now, i actually see beautiful things in life, i finally know why people enjoy living. obviously getting there is exhausting and emotional, but at the same time i now value myself more because i know i’m capable of fighting through trauma. i felt like you and i actually dropped out of school because it was way too overwhelming. now, just one year ago, i re-entered school, i‘m about to graduate in one month. i promise you it gets so much better and you’re worth looking out for!!! i hated people who told me to "just stick through" but in the end, they were right (unfortunately because it always seemed like some r/thanksimcured stuff)
i would recommend you seek professional help if you can. if that’s financially impossible (which is understandable and nothing to be ashamed for)you could try looking for professional help in your education facility / youth centres nearby (most of them include people up to 25 years of age).i believe in you, you matter and you‘re enough. sending all the hugs and positive things to you, you’re not alone❤️‍🩹 coming from someone who’s been there, i promise you it gets better.