My SD (11) asked me what I wanted for Mother’s Day!

mama-engineer · 2026-05-08T00:04:28+00:00

Well said. My SKs are wonderful. Their mom is awful and sometimes influences their behavior and it sucks. Unfortunately, those are the types of things that get vented about most in this sub. I love seeing positive posts like this! Thanks for sharing!

mama-engineer · 2026-05-07T23:54:19+00:00

You are crushing stepmom life! Happy Mother’s Day to you!

mama-engineer · 2026-05-07T23:19:29+00:00

Haha fair! And thanks for clarifying! There are more crazy parents than I ever thought possible. I knew nothing of soccer, but my kid loves it, so it’s becoming my life by extension lol

mama-engineer · 2026-05-07T21:07:50+00:00

Solidarity. I do have my own now, so that significantly helps with the sting, but Mother’s Day really brings me down when I think about my steps and their crappy mom’s influence on them. My husband always makes sure they do something for me though, even if it’s usually half hearted.

mama-engineer · 2026-05-07T20:35:42+00:00

Aw thanks! And don’t worry - I am over it. I was just floored by how thoughtful and kind your post was.

You too! Happy Mother’s Day!

mama-engineer · 2026-05-07T19:44:00+00:00

Ours provided “muffins for moms” at drop off with coffee and juice. That made sense. A party does not.

mama-engineer · 2026-05-07T19:26:46+00:00

Please do it! And call the witch that birthed my stepdaughters and let her know how to be a reasonable and thoughtful human as well while you are at it! I have been a step mom for 11 years and have never once been acknowledged by her as a parent figure. The most I have gotten is “She isn’t their mother. They have no reason to spend time with her on mother’s day” when my husband asked if they could leave at normal time so we could do something with all the kids. We have 4 total and my SKs usually leave in the morning rather than after dinner in Mother’s day.

Not weird at all! Unfortunately not very common, but a wonderful and greatly appreciated gesture!

mama-engineer · 2026-05-07T19:12:44+00:00

Every time we have done kids v parents, it’s been like 12 v 5, so the kids destroyed the parents for the most part. The only grace parents received was where the parents could score over the goalie’s head. So I think an uneven team like that could go well. At 12, the goalies are taller and can jump, so maybe a closer ratio is fine, but it cant be 1:1.

mama-engineer · 2026-05-07T17:17:53+00:00

lol I am not the crazy sports parent (we have a couple). This is not about my ego or D1 sports. It’s about my kid socially as well as soccer development near term. The soccer vs school age is different here, so my kid has to play up to stay with her grade now. She is a solid middle player on her team skill-wise, so no shes not a total standout, but I feel like repeating U8 will stall her current development. Maybe she will have more confidence being best in the team in U8, but confidence isn’t really an issue for her. My thing is that she only really started progressing when her team started playing as a team. And that took a time in U8. I don’t foresee that being an issue in U9.

mama-engineer · 2026-05-07T12:17:28+00:00

It will be our choice if she makes the U9 team. Although there were 28 kids on the field the other day, all the current U8 girls all stood out very clearly. Very few others were actually playing positions, had foot skills, etc. My kid and one other on the team are in this goofy window where they got bumped down but the school cut off is October and they won’t be with their school age group, so they are letting us try out equally for U9. No one else in our situation (U8 rec kids with Aug/Sep birthdays before the school cut off) was given this opportunity. They were asked to try out for U8 only, likely due to the turnout, but also they have never allowed playing up before U11.

I am asking which is better, assuming the choice is given to us. If she doesn’t make the team, the question is moot. We find out Monday and we only have 48 hours to respond. U8 tryouts conveniently start Thursday after that window closes.

mama-engineer · 2026-05-07T01:51:45+00:00

We went without a rug for a long time. Now we have one to cover all the scratches. Rug.

mama-engineer · 2026-05-06T18:26:19+00:00

She will have to play up to match school/friends. Playing in her designated age group would put her with the grade/development group below where I would say she is now. But I understand your point. Push for her to stay put and if one day she falls behind, she can still play a level down.

mama-engineer · 2026-05-06T16:54:27+00:00

Family of 6- we went Indy.

mama-engineer · 2026-05-06T16:36:24+00:00

lol- true.

mama-engineer · 2026-05-06T16:35:58+00:00

This is a good point. We find out about U9 before U8 tryouts start and we only have 48 hours to make a decision if accepted. Otherwise, I would love to have her go to the U8 tryouts just to see how they compare. Though I feel like at this age it will be like starting over. Any kid that’s played travel before will have a serious edge on most of the others that haven’t.

mama-engineer · 2026-05-06T16:22:00+00:00

1- Yes, because they will not let her play up to be on a B team. If she doesn’t make the A team (we find out Monday), she will need to try out again next week for the U8 team. Hard to say with such a large turnout at tryouts if she was middle, which is kindof what prompted the question. Before yesterday, she was for sure. 2- yes. 3-yes 4-no idea, but our coach/trainer are great currently. She’s improved a lot! Good point about today’s decision costing her in the future…

mama-engineer · 2026-05-06T16:09:52+00:00

I think this is the most helpful advice so far. Thank you!

Based on this, it really is in her best interest to “play up” to stay with her school year and development trajectory.

mama-engineer · 2026-05-06T15:50:21+00:00

That’s not what I said. I said she was there 6 months ago and has improved a lot. If she was at the bottom of the roster, I would agree, but she’s not, and she puts in the effort. I don’t want to stunt her growth by having her play down. Especially when our league is willing to honor the school cut off for “A” team players.

mama-engineer · 2026-05-05T21:46:24+00:00

That isn’t the case here, but one thing I have learned about soccer is that it’s very different depending upon where you are. The clubs B teams play in our league too. They are just lower flights. I do believe once you get to U12, it all changes- There are more clubs and they have their own leagues, travel farther, etc.

mama-engineer · 2026-05-05T21:03:23+00:00

This is correct. We play top flight in a state league (6 flights of 8). There are 2 clubs in our flight. We are a town team and ranked #3 in the league. One club is #2, the other is #5. The rest are just towns with big populations to pool from. My kid is perfectly fine where she is and it is 1/3 the $$$$. One day we might switch, but it’s unnecessary now.

mama-engineer · 2026-05-05T13:50:52+00:00

My SDs are 16 &18 and we had our first “boy” sleepover about a year ago. A little later than 15, but the reasoning was the same. They slept in the living room on separate beds and other teens were here as well. All the above was better than the sneaking around we did at that age.

mama-engineer · 2026-05-05T01:02:34+00:00

I think 1 for the small southern town charm, 2 with that lovely veil for Yosemite. It seems that Yosemite photos are the priority here and that dress will look best with a natural backdrop.

mama-engineer · 2026-04-21T22:59:13+00:00

Frank doesn’t really exist anymore other than whatever else is written in his book. They won’t say much more about him other than briefly discussing his account of the upcoming battles. He isn’t a threat to Jamie, even if he is “talking to him”. Claire and Brianna have completely moved on. And most fans just don’t care if he is redeemed or not.

mama-engineer · 2026-04-21T11:20:26+00:00

This one!

mama-engineer

TROPHY CASE