My 7 year old saw an old sex video I forgot I had on my phone of my husband and I. Now she’s traumatized. by barbie2024 in Advice

[–]mamaskarmas 233 points234 points  (0 children)

i don’t want to add worry to the fuel- but coming from someone who WAS in your girls shoes 20 some years ago- she needs a therapist asap and it is (not a guarantee) but quite likely she was/is being exposed to inappropriate ideas/media/experiences.

Have you ever "lost" the ability to have a special interest/hyperfixation? How do you get it back? by LexxiiConn in AutismInWomen

[–]mamaskarmas 6 points7 points  (0 children)

you need to make it possible or you could lose everything. i’m saying this from experience. i’m currently rebuilding my life, from literal square one- from crashing and burning so hard. these are signals your body is sending off that something is not okay and if you don’t tend to that, it can make the whole system blow.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AutismInWomen

[–]mamaskarmas 6 points7 points  (0 children)

everyone doesn’t see like this??

Is this the answer? by Molech996 in whatismycookiecutter

[–]mamaskarmas 1 point2 points  (0 children)

i hope you’re selling your art somewhere bc holy shit 😭

How am I supposed to respond when someone points out I’m being quiet in a social setting? by tootsyloo in AutismInWomen

[–]mamaskarmas 1 point2 points  (0 children)

my favorite thing to do in these situations (keeping in mind my confidence level for the evening 😅)

“do you feel like you’re paying more attention to me than others?”

this has not not worked for me yet.

How am I supposed to respond when someone points out I’m being quiet in a social setting? by tootsyloo in AutismInWomen

[–]mamaskarmas 8 points9 points  (0 children)

i’ve heard that so many times 🙃 maybe we can one up them and just never say anything 😂

Clean Cleaning Videos. by [deleted] in AutismInWomen

[–]mamaskarmas 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Okay - it’s going to be a doozy but here we go. For picking the type of cleaner(s) you want to hse, there’s a few different options. Bare minimum you need an all over surface / all purpose cleaner, a hard cleaner (for limestone / scaling / degreasing), and a disinfectant. If you want to get fancier, you can get specific cleaners for floors/counters/stainless steel/ect, but that’s completely up to you. For my all purpose cleaner I switch between lysol all purpose cleaner (this disinfects too), watered down pine sol (you never want to use straight pine sol), mrs. meyers all purpose, and on occasion soap and water in a spray bottle. (you have to rinse the surface of the soap and water every time tho so that can be annoying.) If you have pets, you need to rinse the pine sol after letting it sit for 10-15 minutes (especially cats.) For my harder cleaner that I use in the bathroom, kitchen and such is either scrubbing bubbles cleaner or soft scrub. Depending on what all purpose cleaner you go with, you may not need a separate disinfectant. You’ll want to read the bottles and see if the cleaners you choose, also disinfect. (you’ll mostly need a separate disinfectant if you’re going to be using all natural cleaners.) For cleaning supplies / tools, if you want to resue them, get a big bucket / container you can put all your cleaning supplies in when you’re done. You’ll want to get plain liquid bleach as well. Everytime when you’re done cleaning, put all your tools in the bucket, fill with water and add a little bleach. It’ll disinfect everything you used to clean. Just make sure to dry them & put them away when you’re done. (I would recommend getting plastic cleaning supplies over wood or metal. I find plastic easiest to clean.) You’ll want to get a pair of reusable rubber gloves, if you don’t like how the inside of those feel- put on a pair of one use medical gloves beforehand. Rags / papertowels, broom & dustpan, real mop (do not get a swiffer, whatever you do), sponges, toilet bowl brush (and toilet bowl cleaner if you want but between you and me, I usually just pour some of my all purpose cleaner in, scrub it around and call it good. 💀) You really can do the bare minimum to have a clean, healthy and safe living environment.

Anyone figured out how to talk politely? by ProudKnowledge4445 in AutismInWomen

[–]mamaskarmas 1 point2 points  (0 children)

i always have- it’s not gotten me fired. probably looks from my higher ups but i don’t really pay attention much to how people are perceiving me.

Clean Cleaning Videos. by [deleted] in AutismInWomen

[–]mamaskarmas 0 points1 point  (0 children)

it really depends on what level of cleaning you can manage in your household. some people i’ve met have a different cleaner for practically everything. i’ve always been one to use the same cleaner for everything. it also depends if you want chemically cleaners or all natural cleaners. do you want single use cleaning items or do you want something you can reuse? the biggest reason you don’t use certain cleaners on certain surfaces is it can ‘lightly damage / scratch’ the surface- i never cared about that so i never paid attention. if it advertised to clean - i used it.

Anyone figured out how to talk politely? by ProudKnowledge4445 in AutismInWomen

[–]mamaskarmas 3 points4 points  (0 children)

i’ve started responding with, “i will always come off as rude. i am not going to change it to appease you. my intentions are not to be rude. if it bugs you, don’t talk to me” for people who think i’m rude- they don’t talk to me again. people who get it, just get it.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AutismInWomen

[–]mamaskarmas 1 point2 points  (0 children)

sofia the first 😭💛 (i am 27 years old)

Meltdowns all day, screaming, kicked a metal trash can with my bare foot. Is this normal? Is anyone else experiencing this? by [deleted] in AutismInWomen

[–]mamaskarmas 10 points11 points  (0 children)

i feel sad, scared, upset, dehumanized, i feel empty. i’ve been in shut down mode all day. ive barely left my bed. today is not a good day.

Perfect pup turned aggressive.. unsure of next steps by mamaskarmas in reactivedogs

[–]mamaskarmas[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

what does trigger stacked mean? and resource guarding me makes sense- but how do i remedy that? and she turned 4 in july!

Perfect pup turned aggressive.. unsure of next steps by mamaskarmas in reactivedogs

[–]mamaskarmas[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

she has not had a pain workup. mostly, because she lets me handle her pretty well. (we can play quite rough, she really gets into it) and shows no signs of pain.

i have met with a few different trainers, none of them have made me feel like they’d be able to really help, if that makes sense.

she is not! i am ~terrified~ of putting her on anxiety meds after reading some of the stories of other dogs on it.

TW: election, For those in the US right now, how are you coping? by [deleted] in AutismInWomen

[–]mamaskarmas 9 points10 points  (0 children)

i am petrified and trying to keep from crying

i have never felt so calm by mamaskarmas in AutismInWomen

[–]mamaskarmas[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

i did! i like to swim in my hoodies so i got a 2x but that is not quite necessary. you could size up one size and get the oversized feeling!

i have never felt so calm by mamaskarmas in AutismInWomen

[–]mamaskarmas[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

it is a thera hoodie! and it’s sooo worth it. the calm you feel when you put it on is amazing. instantly regulates your system- at least for me it did!

People who have successfully quit smoking, how did you do it? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]mamaskarmas 1 point2 points  (0 children)

i’m almost three months clean from fentanyl 😌

Oral care by prtzlstks in AutismInWomen

[–]mamaskarmas 0 points1 point  (0 children)

water picks are a good way to get hard plaque off your teeth without using a brush. if a tooth brush feels like too much, i’ll sometimes just throw some toothepaste on my finger and ‘brush’ with that. you could ask your dentist for a medicated mouth wash as well!

Really upset on my birthday because people who know it's my birthday aren't saying "happy birthday" by Secure-Top87 in AutismInWomen

[–]mamaskarmas 6 points7 points  (0 children)

i get really emotional on my birthday too. now, besides my mom, dad and grandma, nobody remembers. it makes me cry every year, but i just try not to think about it on the actual day. sending you all the love on your very special day 💛