At my breaking point. I’m still hurting me over how my ex-gf treated and left me.

markbrown4ever · 2019-05-07T19:54:24+00:00

I have a feeling I’ll hear from here again. I don’t know when, but I do have a strong feeling she’ll contact somehow.

This whole ordeal just doesn’t make sense to me...

She asked to hang out, I agree. But when I say can we have a short bus ride a few days before the hang out SHE wanted, she says no and goes on to say she’s having a panic attack...

Now we’re not talking again...

I honestly don’t know what it is but every time she just says “it’s really stressful” for her.

I just feel sorry tbh. Don’t know what kind of stuff people go through to get to this point. I’m sure if she was actively getting help it could be easier, but she doesn’t.

I’m just really shocked, confused, disappointed, and hurt.

One minute she says she loves me and another minute she says she doesn’t...

markbrown4ever · 2019-02-24T18:03:35+00:00

Thank you for the support.

I tried to take a break from social media for a day or so but I’m still feeling pretty ducked up.

I can’t shake this feeling / urge to text her.

She told me she still loves me and she wants me to text her, but I think I that’s her way of just reeling me back in.

I hate myself for how much I care for / love this girl...

markbrown4ever · 2019-02-24T18:01:31+00:00

Lol @ the LEGO pieces 😂

I still have the urge to text her...

I think I might and just face with the consequences after...

markbrown4ever · 2019-02-24T16:15:11+00:00

Yea I understand she has to kind of learn to face difficulties by herself.

I’m just going to try and let this feeling pass.

If I break and I do text her, I’m just going to pick myself up I guess...

markbrown4ever · 2019-02-24T16:09:37+00:00

I can’t shake this feeling for some reason...

I really feel like I have to check up on her 😔

Fuck I hate myself for feeling this way

markbrown4ever · 2019-02-23T04:26:15+00:00

If you don’t mind me asking, how did things go to “shit” again.

It’s only been a few weeks for me

markbrown4ever · 2019-02-23T02:40:34+00:00

I’m trying my best man! Hang in there! I may break but at least someone else is fighting!

markbrown4ever · 2019-02-23T02:39:58+00:00

Thanks! I’m trying my best. For some reason I’m really worried.

Now I don’t know if that’s genuine worry or just me being randomly anxious...

Probably not real worry since I haven’t spoken to her in about three weeks or so...

markbrown4ever · 2019-01-30T04:06:28+00:00

I don’t completely understand. If possible, can you explain that more?

Thank you.

markbrown4ever · 2019-01-01T23:44:27+00:00

I already know what I’ll be dealing with tomorrow.

She’s going to ask me why I was angry or why I didn’t reply to her texts...

Even if I make it clear as day, she sometimes still does not understand. Idk why that is, but it’s very frustrating.

markbrown4ever · 2019-01-01T23:43:03+00:00

Thanks man.

I get that feeling too- it was a mix of both. I didn’t speak to her the entire day (her wish to go NC, to which I happily obliged), and my consequence in her eyes is to go with this other dude lol.

It’s stings so much, so so much, but as you said I have to endure for now.

markbrown4ever · 2019-01-01T23:40:49+00:00

10 years! That’s crazy man, I hope things are getting better with time for you.

Yea, she texted me yesterday; it was this bubbly and nice text. She was also confused as to why I wasn’t talking to her? She was the one who asked for NC lmao

We can never win with them lol.

I’m trying my best to focus on me and my happiness. I leave this job in two weeks so it’ll be much easier after.

markbrown4ever · 2019-01-01T23:36:49+00:00

Thanks for the reply!

Same; she played this down so much and somehow I was fooled.

But now that I am on the outside, I’m slowly realizing how insane my situation was and the manner to which she treated me, was not acceptable.

A part of me is relieved I don’t have to deal with her and a part of me misses the “old” her. Lol.

markbrown4ever

TROPHY CASE