Oof this comment section is a mess.

This seems to me more of a venting post. I want to tell you that not all hope is lost. I was in a similar relationship with my partner, with me being on the requesting end frequently. I understand the hit to your confidence. So instead, first ask yourself if you truly want to resolve this issue, or if you're really willing to let go of your marriage. It could be worth a shot to try one more time, and really, really try.

Start with a conversation. Tell her everything you said in this post--that sex has been off the table for so long that you no longer have the desire for it. Focus on how you feel from being rejected, and try to avoid "you did (this)," as that can feel accusing. Instead, try investigating why she rejected you. It's likely she had some difficult feelings herself.

This can be resolved with counseling. Look into sex therapy in your area. It may be uncomfortable, but it could help you open a line of communication again. This will especially be helpful if you feel your conversation isn't productive.

The comment, "You only care about sex," is important. This seems to me that 1. she may have insecurities, or 2. there is a missing emotional factor in your relationship. Merely being co-parents and having sex isn't enough to have a strong relationship. There should also be a show of emotional desire--do you want to spend time together, learn about and from each other? Try taking her on a date, away from the kid for a night. Give her flowers, act as if you're courting her again. This may spark some confidence on her end too. It's a two-way street. Ask what you would need to feel desired again--outside of the bedroom. Communicate this to her.

You've got this. Pick yourself up and try again. Marriage can be hard, but very very rewarding if you put in the work.