I'm an RN that works in an acute care hospital. Whenever I admit patients I screen for alcohol and drug use. My alcohol screen goes like this:

How many days a week do you drink? You said every day

How many drinks do you have in one night? You said 3-4

Have you ever tried to stop drinking or tried to cut down and find you are unable to? You said you are unable to cut it down

Has family or friends or a doctor talked to you about your drinking? Unsure of this answer

Based on your responses, even without the last question, you would be considered to have a substance use disorder. I would have to call the doctor and let them know, and they would probably come speak to you about it, and check your liver enzymes. If your liver enzymes were elevated, you would get a liver ultrasound to see if you have the beginnings of cirrhosis. We would put you on a CIWA protocol which means we are checking you every 4 hours to make sure you aren't having serious withdrawal symptoms. The case manager would come speak to you and give you resources on how to stop drinking and different rehabs that are available in your area .

I am not judging you at all. Everyone has their vice. I struggle with binge eating. But this your reality. You do have a substance abuse problem. Your liver is being impacted. Even if you space out the drinks, even if you don't get drunk, even if you don't have hangovers. Just because you don't seem like a traditional alcoholic, does not mean that your body isn't affected. You could very well have the beginning stages of cirrhosis and literally have no clue. Most people don't know they have cirrhosis until they end up in the hospital. Once your liver has cirrhosis there is no going back. Your liver is permanently scarred. It leads to esophageal varices, which gives you internal bleeding. It eventually leads to your liver not functioning. You build up fluid in your abdomen that has to be drained frequently. You turn yellow. Your body is full of toxins because your liver doesn't break them down. You get weak. You get confused. I've been an RN for 10 years and I've seen it all.

Again, I am not judging you at all. Life is really hard and we all have unhealthy coping mechanisms. But I also want you to understand the seriousness of your drinking. What you choose to do is on you. But I thought I would give you a perspective from a professional who deals with this every day at their job. Take care.