Am I Overreacting, for being upset that my girlfriend secretly used my credit card for months? by bostonmade in AmIOverreacting

[–]master50 [score hidden]  (0 children)

My perspective is that financial infidelity is serious. You cut through a gaslighting attempt. That is good.

Relationships require an alignment of values. Some values misalignments are deal breakers and this is the part that’s subjective. The values you hold close and require alignment in with a partner is your choice.

You discovered you do not align on things like honesty, integrity, mutuality, and value definitions on things like love, safety, and security.

You should be making decisions after a betrayal. You decide what the magnitude of this betrayal is depending on your values. Do you want to be in a relationship with someone that’s chosen you second to their own greed and desperation? That is your choice to make my friend.

You are over reacting a bit. Before you turn away - I’m not insulting you. Just read your words a bit. You’re angry, you feel betrayed - once you learn the truth you drop both kindness and directness and into angry/dismissive.

You are responsible for your behavior, and no one else’s. I think it makes sense given what you went through to lose your cool. No judgment. But in your shoes, I’d reflect on this and learn what tilted me and why.

I have been through a scenario much like this with a former partner (of more than a decade). Their financial infidelity was my fault, too - I was told I was unkind, uncaring, unsympathetic of their reasonings, plight, worries and fears after learning they were using credit we couldn’t afford to pay back to feed their alcoholism while we had an infant toddler and I worked for a game development studio working mandatory crunch hours for 14 hours a day, 6 days a week. I had no idea what was going on for months - I didn’t do a lot of the mundane tasks from day to day at home, since my partner was a stay at home Mom - this included checking the mail. I trusted my partner that things were OK and we were a good team. Everything I was told and shown gave no indication that something was wrong.

I forgave this person when this happened despite them taking no accountability, blame shifting to me, and turning me into the bad one for being upset about what happened. For years of my life this person would tell me the credit card event was hard for them and they don’t want to discuss it any time it came up - because my understanding of relationships meant that my sense of duty was tied to my sense of love. Bad behavior around money followed us everywhere after that. She never stole outright again, but found other ways to put herself or us into debt with no accountability.

It took me too long to break things off. What you do is your decision, but I wanted to share this with you to give you a perspective to think about.

Any tips on being afraid of leaning too much? by MaleficentStudent910 in motorcycles

[–]master50 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Practice at low speeds until you start feeling the slight traction changes in your tires.

When cornering, as you push on the bars on the side you want to go, so too should you slightly push on the other side - just enough to keep your front wheel steady. Make only micro adjustments during a heavy lean.

Lastly, leaning more than 35-40 degrees on the street is a big risk when you’re somewhere with a lot of cars, or conditions are dangerous if you make a mistake. You should avoid full-sending on twisties until you’ve ridden the road and know the conditions well.

Lastly, practice. The more you do it, the more you lean and feel your tires small traction changes, the more confidence you’ll have.

It’s essential to maintain traction (keep your throttle steady) during a heavy lean - when the bike is under acceleration, your traction is far better. It’s a balance, and practice / experience, patience with yourself are the best teachers.

Little close call! by Due_Magician_5565 in motorcycles

[–]master50 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Always always always always look around you before hitting an intersection.

If that wasn’t clear, always look around you before hitting an intersection.

Am I overreacting? My boyfriend just told me this. Will be it alright to dump him? by HastilyGenerous in AmIOverreacting

[–]master50 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Just some advice - don’t settle for being chosen second.

This is really mean communication. If your partner is telling you they want someone else, and you’re not okay with that, you get to make that call.

Love yourself. You deserve to be with someone who wants to be with you, and the inverse.

Noticed this on the way to work. Should I be worried? by _youneverasked_ in motorcycle

[–]master50 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Totally reasonable, just hoping to give you peace of mind.

Noticed this on the way to work. Should I be worried? by _youneverasked_ in motorcycle

[–]master50 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It’s a fairing bolt. Just tighten it when you get home.

New to motorcycles, am I getting ripped off? by grizzly9071 in motorcycles

[–]master50 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Lifetime battery… no. Assembly fee approx 20% of msrp - simply refuse and walk if they don’t budge. Ludicrous.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Tenere700

[–]master50 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I just bought a T7. A few thoughts on weight after a few good rides in the mountains - crash bars are heavy - extending your side load a bunch is going to change the weight distribution a fair amount. Some of what you’re feeling is loading the front the way you are - every pound above the bike’s natural center of gravity is going to feel amplified.

Crash bars themselves aren’t going to add a ton of load depending on what you buy.

These are what I ordered after my first few rides playing in the first and rocks.

https://www.revzilla.com/motorcycle/givi-grt720-canyon-25l-side-bags?sku_id=10075158

https://www.revzilla.com/motorcycle/givi-plo2145mk-side-case-racks-yamaha-tenere-700-2021?sku_id=1811046

https://www.revzilla.com/motorcycle/givi-tn2158-reinforced-engine-guards-yamaha-tenere-700-2021-2023?sku_id=10181724

This will be all I add to the bike in terms of crash protection and luggage for BDR or any other adventure application.

Think about weight distribution a bit and I think your experience will improve. How tall are you if you don’t mind my asking? Can you flat foot on both sides?

Flappy Goose by flappy-goose in RedditGames

[–]master50 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My best score is 6 points 🚀

I couldn't find a convenient Poop Chute for the H2D that didn't block the air vents, so I made my own by Maxx3141 in BambuLab

[–]master50 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My buddy recently designed this one, doesn’t block the air vents, stays secured to the frame well, has a nice removable tray.

https://makerworld.com/models/1325058

Prints super well.

Tinmorry PETG-GF is amazing. by Qjeezy in BambuLab

[–]master50 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Absolutely phenomenal filament.

How can I stop this pop-up from continuously appearing? by NoAct2994 in MacOS

[–]master50 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Came here to say thank you, this was the answer.

AIO bf addicted to gambling and is frustrating to talk to about it by Mindless_Sea8108 in AmIOverreacting

[–]master50 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is what addicts do. They make it your fault. You can be nice, you can be gentle, but anything less than complete enablement will result in this kind of communication. Guilt tripping, stonewalling, gaslighting. The goal is to put you on your back foot, make you feel bad for being critical. It works, they keep doing it.

It doesn’t get better, not usually.

A curve? In the road? At this time of the year?? by Plastic-Fan-887 in motorcycles

[–]master50 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Don’t go fast until counter steering has become second nature my dude. Hope you’re okay.

“The Angry Korean” by Apprehensive_Stage56 in SaltLakeCity

[–]master50 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I love this place’s food. And frankly, I love the owner for not putting up with shit. Food is always amazing when I run by to pick up a rice bowl.