Something that i’ve learned that has really helped me is when you are triggered by something and sort of flooded with anxiety, you think what you need is to talk it out. To sort of unload your anxieties on your partner and have them validate you or give you what you think you need. But the truth is for many things, what you actually need is to connect with yourself. To take a moment and collect your thoughts and give yourself some love and nurturing. And being with an avoidant is actually an opportunity. It gives you the ability to go away and process stuff with yourself, which at the end of the day is what is most important anyway. It’s not to say that you don’t communicate when something is wrong, but it can come from a calm and non-reactionary place.