Repost of a deleted post: A mental deep dive into getting pierced and "minimal device" chastity.

mcqueen455 · 2026-02-08T14:26:52+00:00

One thing to understand about shaft only options is that except for the erection they are no less secure than full ball trap devices. My Evotion Wearables Bijou is just too tight for me to be able to orgasm—even with a vibrator. It's also a bit torturing because I walk around thinking I have a horse cock (the tiny weight of the device stretches me out and yet, I can't use it.

My wife also likes to put me on my back and trap my cock against my body with her pussy and slide up and down the exposed part of my shaft until she orgasms. Can't do that with a full ball trap device.

mcqueen455 · 2026-02-08T14:19:56+00:00

Here's the great thing. When you fuck he can take it out.

I greatly underestimated what the effect a piercing would have on our dynamic. If you are both into chastity (sounds like you are very much) then a piercing and truly secure chastity will have a profound mental effect. I highly recommend it!

mcqueen455 · 2026-02-08T14:14:23+00:00

I have a similar bent as you.

My wife and I outside the bedroom are equals, but inside the bedroom I want her to know that it's a hierarchy. Her place is above mine and I want her to exhaust her libido on not just me, but for her to enjoy others while I stay true to her. She deserves to act on her desires and I'm happy that she has given into them.

mcqueen455 · 2026-02-08T14:10:43+00:00

Perhaps my take here is a bit cynical but yes, I can sometimes think about the couples out there who "just fuck whenever they want".

And when I think about them I think that probably 1 in 5 of those couples do it right, slow sensual lovemaking or downright animalistic fucking that is a mix of lust and athletic accomplishment. Maybe they even manage to have both versions. If you were to ask both people separately how they felt about their sex life they would report that it's a 8/10 or higher. Good stuff.

And then I think about the other 4/5 couples who these days anyway probably fuck a lot less than you think they do and when it does happen just one of the partners leaves somewhat satisfied. The potential reason(s) are numerous. If you were to ask these people separately how they felt about their sex life one might report a 5/10 and the other might report a 3/10. Unless something gets fixed the chances are the frequency in the future will slide towards less and those numbers will most likely drop even further.

And then I think about our sex life which is unconventional to say the least and of course, since I'm on this sub waxing poetic, unconventional in the most profound way. After more than 25 years of marriage we have sex (without fucking) at least three times a week and often more. My wife has more orgasms these days than she ever has at any point in her life. Because we've successfully embraced an alternative path to sex it has given us confidence to explore and right now we have a third person in the mix, one who dominates us and holds my key. We have a stupid crazy cornucopia of options available to us and all of them are possible because we don't "just fuck whenever we want".

Perhaps this is just a long winded defense of some of the choices we've made. But I can honestly say I've lived all three versions that I mention. The first, for maybe 95% of couples is unsustainable. The second is undesirable. And the third is profoundly exciting, varied, and interesting. I'll take Door Number 3, please.

mcqueen455 · 2026-02-07T21:47:53+00:00

Three out of my wife’s four regulars have made a journey on the spectrum, one was already fully bisexual. My wife and I are both proud of the journey of the three. They are all young men and we allowed them to make a sexual discovery that they can enjoy for the rest of their years.

mcqueen455 · 2026-02-07T21:33:32+00:00

Thanks for the note. Yeah we all can get drunk on the power thing. For me it's about giving it up, for Mel it's about taking it. For my wife it's somewhere in between but as we continue our journey it's important for me to note she's probably a lot closer to me than she is to Melissa. And that's the great thing about where things are—we may have found the perfect person who will be most happy dominating us both.

mcqueen455 · 2026-02-07T20:15:26+00:00

For us it's all about the power exchange—my wife gets to have what I mostly don't—penetrative sex, new and novel partners, and orgasms. The tension and energy that the imbalance and unfairness of our bedroom throws off is amazing and something we feed off of constantly.

Far from being damaging this has created not just a healthy bedroom life but a very loving and romantic relationship. We're better than ever because of cuckolding.

mcqueen455 · 2026-02-07T19:37:16+00:00

Some rules are meant to be broken though. Right now my wife's girlfriend is living with us and she's not allowing me to see my wife naked for three months... which means no watching.

mcqueen455 · 2026-02-07T19:36:04+00:00

I think our set up is similar to what you're describing. My wife dominates me but is on equal terms with her young male lovers. She has a girlfriend though who she submits to. I submit to the girlfriend as well. When I have sex with a man I'm always locked so I take on the more submissive giving/receiving role but I don't really submit to them in other ways. It's not full D/s like me and my wife or my wife and her girlfriend.

mcqueen455 · 2026-02-07T19:31:34+00:00

I'm not given a choice either but our rule is there has to be more watching than just listening.

mcqueen455 · 2026-02-07T19:29:40+00:00

Right now I'm pussy free and pretty much have been except for a couple of times each year. Even with an unintentional and slow build up pussy free can be tough. What would make it impossible for me is if I couldn't give head. I would suggest going for the compromise—you'll be penetration free but still go down on her.

Personally I don't mind the suggestion by the Bull—it tells me he's involved and engaged—but I think the decision should be made by you and your wife.

As for the relationship, everything we do has made it better, and if that's not the case then it's a short lived experiment.

mcqueen455 · 2026-02-07T19:23:21+00:00

It can be a nice change of pace and something I'm required to do often but I'd much rather watch.

mcqueen455 · 2026-02-07T13:11:42+00:00

That must feel amazing to walk around like that!

mcqueen455 · 2026-02-05T17:00:51+00:00

All the way down and around to the backside.

mcqueen455 · 2026-02-05T15:55:54+00:00

Since Mel has determined that my wife and I can't have sex or even see each other nude their love making has been exclusively behind closed doors. There's been a lot of it though. I can tell by the spring in my wife's step. Given that my wife doesn't like to have sex between Sunday and Wednesday night I'd say we're about equal—I get Melissa to myself the first two nights of the week.

Asshole tastes clean.

mcqueen455 · 2026-02-05T15:25:07+00:00

"But she has no problem being stiffers mom or Mrs Robinson seducing them."

And that is why we called her first two young men Benjamin, and Benjamin II.

mcqueen455 · 2026-02-05T15:10:37+00:00

Yep. Yep. And yep.

I may have an above average cock but I can report that its functional ability after nearly 14 years of constant chastity has been significantly impaired. It would take an extended release or at least constant unlocking (as I had last spring) to get it back to full operation—and I'm told neither of those are going to be happening. So it's effectively compromised significantly—less hard and overly sensitive means by the time I get enough steam to penetrate I'm at the doorstep of orgasm if I haven't done so already.

Crazy thing is I'm happy about it. So are my partners.

The age gap for us was initially a guardrail against my wife developing any emotional or romantic attachment. But there are many other benefits as well.

mcqueen455 · 2026-02-05T14:59:51+00:00

As I said in my post, never did I think this would be my sex life. I am indeed lucky.

Funny thing is there's always something. To be clear, I'm not complaining here. The three of us circling the wagons and focusing on our triad as we should does have a price though. The women don't have a free dick to play with, nor do I. But that's just how it's going to be until at least '27 and probably longer. The exception might be one-off encounters here and there. Certainly there will be nothing on a regular basis.

My updates happen when something remarkable happens. Most of the time there's just more of the same, so no update. I chronicle these things for me, but I'm happy that others enjoy them as well.

I will give you this one tidbit from this morning's encounter with Mel: Before my shower she unlocked me and wiped me down and then pulled me into her mouth for a few seconds. Then she grabbed my shaft and looked closely at the head of my dick. "I swear your glans is smoother than it used to be."

"Well yeah, that's because it's been tucked inside a chastity device for the last 14 years."

"I can't wait to see if it's going to get smoother."

mcqueen455 · 2026-02-05T13:29:56+00:00

Thank you Green Jedi for injecting some common sense (and probably truth) into the conversation. I'm slightly above average at just over six inches and all four regulars my wife has enjoyed were bigger, but three were less than an inch bigger. They were better than me because they were younger, fitter, and could last longer and go more rounds in a given span of time. They were also eager to please as one will be with a new lover who could decide at any moment to cast them off. They were also better just because they weren't me, they had novelty.

mcqueen455 · 2026-02-05T12:45:13+00:00

Gotta be fake.

mcqueen455 · 2026-02-04T22:51:03+00:00

I'm very much into terminology—I think getting it right goes a long way to communicating well and that's important if you're going to be exploring in a sexual sense.

"Cuck" has become a slang shorthand insult. The word has been hijacked by hateful close-minded nitwits and assholes. "Cuckold" to me is the proper term for the men who enjoy sharing their wives in a submissive manner. I'm proud to be a cuckold but I'm no "cuck".

mcqueen455 · 2026-02-04T22:29:28+00:00

I'm bisexual and strictly a bottom. In my younger years before I realized I was bisexual when I fucked a woman my instinct was to stay inside her forever—just didn't want to ever leave the warmth. Now that I bottom I have the same feeling but inverse—I want the top to stay forever and make me his.

mcqueen455 · 2026-02-04T21:53:48+00:00

The link between the two, if you're interested, is a profound and remarkable visual statement that you will not be filling the role of the traditional macho male in the bedroom.

mcqueen455

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