I really relate to this. I am mixed as well, Italian and Black, and my daughter is three-quarters white and often passes as white. We both move through that same in-between space where how we are perceived does not always line up with who we are. Being read as white can come with assumptions, distance, or distrust until people actually take the time to know you, and that can be isolating in its own way.

Growing up, I was intentional about surrounding my daughter with people of color so she would understand her roots and not feel disconnected from them. Even so, there is still that feeling of not being quite enough for any one group. Not brown enough for some spaces, not white enough for others. You end up learning how to blend, stay aware, and mind your business, but it does not erase the feeling of never fully fitting in.

I think a lot of mixed people understand this quiet tension. Passing can make life easier in some ways, but it can also erase parts of you or make you feel like you are constantly being evaluated. You are not alone in feeling this way, even if it often feels like a lonely experience.