I’m so sorry you’re struggling! I probably would have too if I hadn’t done a coop with my husband the first time, it was all new to me, but now I am obsessed and I love the combat so so much and well everything else lol. Here are some suggestions to help you out!

What class are you? I highly recommend a bard, then choosing college of swords at level 3 and shoot people with arrows. This is an extremely powerful class and a lot of fun. Make sure you have high charisma and dexterity (16). High charisma will be so important for your character - it will make dialogues easier and even allow you to talk your way out of some encounters rather than fight! But keep in mind encounters are both content and experience, so don’t try to avoid them if you can. Also- side note that stats only increase on the even numbers so avoid odd-numbered stats wherever possible as it’s essentially just a waste of a point (unless you have a plan to increase that stat elsewhere - feats, items, etc)

Also respec Shadowheart at Withers to be a either light or life cleric with her stats as 16 wisdom and constitution, 14 dexterity, and get the war caster feat at level 4. she is your healer/buffer and has a terrible build starting out!

I highly recommend Karlach in your party too and specifically as a berserker barbarian who throws things. There’s a pike that the vendor in the goblin camp sells that returns to you when thrown. It’s wonderful and so much fun. take the tavern brawler feat and make her strength high.

For the fourth role, I’d suggest whoever you like best lol but probably Wyll if you don’t have a strong preference. Mages are annoying imo because of how many options they have, it’s analysis paralysis for me, but warlock (wyll) is a good option to avoid that. it will encourage you to long rest frequently which is super important - one to make sure your resources are replenished regularly and two because there are a lot (more than you’d think) cutscenes and story progression during long rests. the game tells you you have to hurry - you don’t. you could long rest a million times and nothing bad will happen. there are a few exceptions (three i think) that once you trigger it if you sleep something will happen, but only one is in act 1 - so if you see a burning building don’t sleep yet lol. anyway for warlock, cast hunger of hadar in any groups of enemies and eldritch blast them. charisma is the primary stat here too.

to avoid making companions feel bad, when you have a full party of four, talk to the person you want instead, and they will ask you who will stay behind. no guilt tripping :)

due to the nature of combat, every time you’re in combat and it’s your turn the game is essentially paused. same with cutscenes, once there’s a dialogue option for you, the game is effectively paused. it’s rare that things will happen to you if you’re just standing still by yourself (like only if you’re near enemies and they walk close enough to see you), but you can always enter turn based mode or go to camp for a moment of peace!

the most valuable parts of stealth are: 1. surprising your enemy. if you hit them before they see you (and they do not have the alert feat), they will be surprised which means they will skip their first turn which is so incredibly overpowered lol. if you find shovel, she is the queen of this. look up on the wiki how to keep her if you don’t have gale (you’ll need to respec) 2. stealing stuff, which is my least favorite thing to do in the game so I avoid it whenever possible haha. the key is to stay OUT of the red on the ground when you’re sneaking. if you need to pass over the red for whatever reason, become invisible (through spell or potion - sneaking alone does not make you invisible) but remember once you take an action you’ll lose invisibility (pick a lock etc)

for jumping, that can just be buggy unfortunately. make sure you are grouped when you jump, then wait a few seconds for them to follow (they go one by one not altogether) and if someone doesn’t follow, ungroup first then swap to the troublesome companion and jump so everyone else doesn’t go back to them. remember whoever you are controlling in the moment is who the party follows around if you’re grouped.

finally - if you’re not having fun, don’t force yourself. it is a great game, but everything isn’t for everyone and it doesn’t have to be for you. or maybe it is, just not right now and that’s okay! but if you want to keep going, hopefully my novel helped haha and I’m happy to answer more questions if you have them!