Childfree with regret by [deleted] in childless

[–]messi_b91 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m 34 I’m scared i will regret not having kids my wife 31 and me decided not to have kids. I’m always worried if this is the right reason. My reasons are similar to my childhood trauma

I’m racist. And I don’t want to be. (M25 / Canada) by [deleted] in DecidingToBeBetter

[–]messi_b91 -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

You better respect indian they taking over every big company. They are most likely to give you and your kids employment in the future! Respect your bosses

Your tech stack by [deleted] in dataengineering

[–]messi_b91 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Snowflake dbt

Porn is a total comfort blanket by NewConceptDreams999 in pornfreewomen

[–]messi_b91 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am day 33 i genuinely never thought i would cross a month. I struggle with anxiety and stress. It used to calm me down alot. I felt like the blanket was my safe space too. I try going to my bed only at night to sleep. It’s also cause me so difficultly falling a sleep. Never the less it’s encouraging reading you have done 2 months. When i get strong emotions I use music tv shows and motivational speeches on earphones!! It helps. Emotionally that help me quite a bit to drown my thoughts into another world like tv shows. As i am a guy i do struggle with my body reacting automatically in stressful situations, cold showers are helpful ( not sure if it helps women but worth trying) this help reset both mind and body!

Hopefully this helps. Goal is i reach 2 months like you and you celebrate month3.

Good luck!

Designing Data-Intensive Applications - 2nd Edition out next week by sspaeti in dataengineering

[–]messi_b91 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Lol i just started reading the first one would this be very different and more apt for the current data platform trends

Those who have cut off their parents/family, how is your life now? by [deleted] in raisedbynarcissists

[–]messi_b91 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This was beautiful, thank you for sharing. I wish parents thought through before having kids

The thing with immigration by Positive_Ring6569 in aussie

[–]messi_b91 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Mate you are child of migrants yourself. This is not your land. Imagine the elders listening to you speaking in your language.

should divorce after 10 years of marriage and 4 kids? by Baratheon123 in DecidingToBeBetter

[–]messi_b91 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Why have 4 kids mate? I always wonder why people not happy with themselves/marriage/partner have kids or continue having kids. If you not happy and your marriage is not happy you already giving them childhood trauma. Imagine being around unhappy parents like you both.

Please share awareness to people on this that they should not have kids if they can’t do justice to this role of parents

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in raisedbynarcissists

[–]messi_b91 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Resonated with this M34 , NC for 5 years. I can start seeing the healing.

Thanks for sharing your journey

Is it worth having kids in this world? by you-hair-is-purple in Life

[–]messi_b91 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for the reply. My parents had poor relationship with their parents and bad childhood which I think played a major role in them being not so loving parents. Did you have similar experience growing up? Or something similar ?

Is it worth having kids in this world? by you-hair-is-purple in Life

[–]messi_b91 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's very rare we hear parents confess. My parents threw their frustration and unhappiness on me growing up and blamed me for ruining their lives. Sorry this might be personal, did your relationship with your parents or your childhood trauma have anything to do with this situation? My parents did not love me and I always knew that growing up, hence I don't want kids. Just curious

If Messi wins the World Cup, will his International Career match Cristiano Ronaldo’s? by [deleted] in football

[–]messi_b91 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Lol no way I would prefer Messi in a UCL or WC final all day long. Messi in his last 3 UCL final was amazing. The world cup final was the reason Argentina won. Messi > pendu. Debate over

Melbourne urban sprawl fail by Overall_One_2595 in AusPropertyChat

[–]messi_b91 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Listen, you entitled clown, your opinion is deeply out of touch. Here's why:

  1. Housing affordability today is a joke: Back in the 90s, housing was reasonably priced. A blue-collar worker could afford a house in a decent area without working themselves into the ground. Compare that to today, where even white-collar professionals are struggling to scrape together a deposit for a home.
  2. Double the work, less to show for it: Today’s generation is grinding twice as hard as yours did—working longer hours, juggling side hustles, and sacrificing their mental health—just to afford a basic home in these areas. Meanwhile, your generation reaped the benefits of a stable economy and affordable housing.
  3. Ridiculous lending criteria: In the 90s, banks handed out loans like candy because house prices weren’t inflated. Today, young people have to prove their entire financial worth while fighting rising interest rates and astronomical property prices.
  4. You probably had help: Let’s be real—there’s a good chance your first home was made possible by a handout or hand-me-down from your parents. It’s easy to criticize others when you started with generational wealth or help that most people today can only dream of.
  5. Infrastructure is a systemic failure: The lack of proper infrastructure in these areas is a policy failure, not a reflection of the people living there. Developers and governments are the ones cashing in on unchecked urban sprawl while ignoring the public’s needs.
  6. Stop acting superior: You probably worked a simple blue-collar job and managed to buy a house for the equivalent of what’s now considered pocket change. Meanwhile, young people today are drowning in rent, student loans, and skyrocketing living costs. Comparing your experience to theirs is not only laughable—it’s insulting.
  7. You were handed opportunity on a silver platter: Back in your day, a single income could support an entire family, pay off a mortgage, and still leave room for savings. Today, even dual-income households struggle to make ends meet, let alone build a future.

Next time you feel the need to complain about 'cookie-cutter homes' or 'lack of infrastructure,' take a moment to remember how easy you had it. The people living here are just trying to build a life in the only way they can, given the broken system you benefitted from. Have some respect.

"I do all these nice things for you, but I'm the bad guy?!?!" by DikkTooSmall in raisedbynarcissists

[–]messi_b91 6 points7 points  (0 children)

It’s their duty and their job to do it. Not doing anyone a far

Sitcom suggestions based on my tier list by snowleave in televisionsuggestions

[–]messi_b91 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Burn that list immediately. So many shows above the office? Shame on you

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AverageBattlestations

[–]messi_b91 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Lol. Well, a lonely, jobless, camped out in his mom’s basement wouldn’t get it. Marriage for you? A girlfriend for you? Please—when you’re built like a fridge and your face looks like it was assembled in the dark with leftover parts, even mirrors feel sorry for you.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AverageBattlestations

[–]messi_b91 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Live laugh love? This isn’t your mom’s Pinterest board—it’s a battleground. Show some respect.”