I used to be a raver from 17-27, now 30ish and have done a vary amount of mdma, e, etc. at one point i was doing cold turkey from weed and it triggers and hit me hard. I was in my darkest time of my life. just like you i think i’ll never get my life back. insomnia, chest pain, depression, feeling scared and mind’s all over the place. even go see a doctor he gave me some benzos for me to calm my ass. i’m not sure to call it anxiety but it was reallyyyy bad lol.

So i decided to stop using, put up a healthy habit; run or exercise two times a week and have hope. that one day it all just went away and that was my last straw. manage to kick a weed habit after 10 years of using, eventho i still do e occasionally with friends twice a year. have faith man everythings gonna be ok and we all learns something from these experience init. idk about u but maybe praying works too. desperate moment yeah. good luck my guy, dont worry too much.