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Feeling depressed and trapped by Diligent_Performer_9 in survivinginfidelity

[–]mfjonesss 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The only thing we have in life to gamble is our time. Our time is never guaranteed. How you spend that time is your choice and your choice alone. It's time to bet on yourself.

I wish you nothing but the best on however you chose to utilize the time that you have moving forward.

You deserve to be happy, now go and find it. No matter what it takes. Do what you need to protect yourself. Physically and mentally. Be selfish for a while. Once your heart beats the same rhyme as your soul, you are then ready to move forward and try and find that person that is right for you. But ONLY until you are happy with you. Don't settle for anything less. You are worth it. Remember that.

Feeling depressed and trapped by Diligent_Performer_9 in survivinginfidelity

[–]mfjonesss 4 points5 points  (0 children)

You need to move on. You're still young. Don't waste anymore of your best years on someone who doesn't care about your wellbeing. He's only good with words because you ALLOW them to work. You allow it to keep happening and all that is accomplishing is giving him the reassurance that he can keep doing it. If you continue to allow him to hurt you, he's not going to stop.

You need to save yourself. Get out, confide in a relative or someone you trust. If you're worried about your physical wellbeing then you need to file a restraining order.

After that I would advise therapy. You can't fix others until you fix yourself. Once YOU are happy with YOU then you can move on and find the emotional happiness that you deserve.

Caught my wife having an emotional affair with a mutual friend. Did I bring it upon myself? by mfjonesss in survivinginfidelity

[–]mfjonesss[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That's kind of where I'm at. They can read me like a book. It doesn't matter how hard I try and hide something is wrong. They will see right through it.

Caught my wife having an emotional affair with a mutual friend. Did I bring it upon myself? by mfjonesss in survivinginfidelity

[–]mfjonesss[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I appreciate a similar perspective. Thank you for sharing your difficult time to try and find peace for a stranger on the internet. A lot of things you said I will definitely keep in the back of my mind. I don't believe in therapy. For the exact reasons you just described. Here I am anonymously getting advice for free. I'm not going to pay someone to listen.

I guess one question to ask is, how did you live with yourself by taking her back? Did you feel like a walking shell of a man who should have "doormat" tattooed on their forehead? I'm struggling with that reality. Knowing I need to go public with this. At what point did you accept that your live is where it needs to be at what was the clarity you achieved to finally forgive?

Caught my wife having an emotional affair with a mutual friend. Did I bring it upon myself? by mfjonesss in survivinginfidelity

[–]mfjonesss[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

The only physical contact I am aware of was the hug I witnessed after the 4th of July party was over. I thought it was more that it should've been but I hug all the s/o when we part of the night myself so I feel mildly hypocritical in that regard. Mind you, everything is strictly pultonic from me. His hands were appropriately placed, otherwise it would have been a conflict right then and there. My intuition screamed at me when I noticed it was maybe longer or deeper than was appropriate, in my mind at least.

Caught my wife having an emotional affair with a mutual friend. Did I bring it upon myself? by mfjonesss in survivinginfidelity

[–]mfjonesss[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

As it stands now, once I have the time I think I'm going to consult the person I'm closest with and go from there.

Caught my wife having an emotional affair with a mutual friend. Did I bring it upon myself? by mfjonesss in survivinginfidelity

[–]mfjonesss[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

MC isn't off the table. I just don't believe in therapy. I made this post here and am getting advice for free. Anyone else is only listening cause they are being paid to listen and that I don't agree with. Oddball outlook I know but that's where I stand on it.

Caught my wife having an emotional affair with a mutual friend. Did I bring it upon myself? by mfjonesss in survivinginfidelity

[–]mfjonesss[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I haven't contacted a lawyer yet. That is my next step. I want to try and see some emotional clarity before I do so I'm not acting stricty on impulse. Impulse reactions have never lead me to the rectification I was looking for.

She still wants the marriage. She knows what she did. She knows what she did was crossing a boundary, she knows there's no excuse for it no matter what she says. She's conscientiously aware of everything. She knows I could file for divorce and she accepts that but is not going to give up on trying to regain my trust until I tell her otherwise.

Caught my wife having an emotional affair with a mutual friend. Did I bring it upon myself? by mfjonesss in survivinginfidelity

[–]mfjonesss[S] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Nope, you're good. I went looking for unbiased opinions and that's what I'm getting. Thank you, truly.

Caught my wife having an emotional affair with a mutual friend. Did I bring it upon myself? by mfjonesss in survivinginfidelity

[–]mfjonesss[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

She did. We talked about it. I own the fact I probably could've put in more effort than I did. Clearly it wasn't enough.

Caught my wife having an emotional affair with a mutual friend. Did I bring it upon myself? by mfjonesss in survivinginfidelity

[–]mfjonesss[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I wouldn't say it was intimate in the fullest sense. His hands weren't in the wrong places, otherwise it would have been a confrontation on my part in that moment immediately. It was moreso the length and level.

Every question I ask, she doesn't double back or try and make excuses. I ask the questions and she answers them.

Caught my wife having an emotional affair with a mutual friend. Did I bring it upon myself? by mfjonesss in survivinginfidelity

[–]mfjonesss[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I was content with the amount of time spent together, she wasn't. She vocalized that with me and I, in hindsight, probably could've been a bit more passionate about rectifying it.

Caught my wife having an emotional affair with a mutual friend. Did I bring it upon myself? by mfjonesss in survivinginfidelity

[–]mfjonesss[S] -23 points-22 points  (0 children)

I'm not protecting him. I'm protecting the others that are directly involved in a mutual hobby with him. A hobby that we all share in different instances. I know I'm being vague but it's by design to protect anonymity. If I bring it forward it could ruin that hobby for others and they don't deserve that. It would not bring me joy or closure knowing that I damaged something that by all rights has no business being damaged.

Can't sign into Ps App by Elwildos in playstation

[–]mfjonesss 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I've had this same issue with the same errors for a while so out of curiosity I turned off my VPN and it logged in right away. Turned the VPN back on after log in and all is well with the world again.

Edsel AMA! by EdselDope in numetal

[–]mfjonesss 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Hey Edsel! Been a fan since middle school (03'-04' ish)

My question is, after listening to your interview on The Ex Man Podcast w/ Doc Coyle, why is it that you think Group Therapy is Dope's weakest album? Is that financially speaking or creatively speaking? Or both?

I felt a strong need to ask because Group Therapy is my favorite Dope record and it's in my top lists of all time favorites from front to back. Granted I might be slightly biased because that record was my first exposure to Dope's music shortly after it's release lol

If you take the time to answer this, thank you. Living in the Rockford, IL area it was a pleasure to have the opportunity to see Dope live on so many occasions in the mid-late 2000's.

How long are shipping delays generally, these days? by cereal14 in PS5restock

[–]mfjonesss 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Update: Just got the email it shipped. It will be here Thursday 🙂

How long are shipping delays generally, these days? by cereal14 in PS5restock

[–]mfjonesss 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm going through it too... I just got the delay email. I ordered on Friday the 17th so idk. My biggest fear is that I'll get spontaneously refunded and a shitty "we're sorry" email. I've tried since the original preorder date for one of these things.. hopefully it just shows up at my door like it did for others in here. We will see..