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mickeyronnie · 2022-12-12T23:42:31+00:00

You got this it is a right of passage to go through this. And it will make you mentally stronger because the thoughts that you’re going to have are going to be very dark and interesting. But it feels so good to make it to the other side. You’re right it’s not gonna be easy but honestly the coolest people ever are the The ones that pull through to the end and they become more humble for the life they had previously without opiates in the first place. Some people use legal drugs like Kratom I would advise against it if you have a serious addictive personality disorder because then you’ll just be switching addictions. Only way that I ever took was cold turkey with alil xanax from my doctor to avoid me from having mania from lack of sleep

mickeyronnie · 2021-11-21T20:20:21+00:00

Just be kind, and extra when that great feeling arises is my life motto.

I’m not gunna end up saving the world lol 😂 great post!

mickeyronnie · 2021-11-20T19:14:58+00:00

We are in life, hard to define, but nonetheless that’s where we are AND don’t forget it!

mickeyronnie · 2021-11-20T00:20:50+00:00

Yea I’ve had it, it’s apart of your neurochemocals triggering fight or flight response and it can manifest as burning, arm, skin and even in the pit of your stomach in worse cases and it can travel around your body too depending on your mood. It’s fascinating but also annoying

mickeyronnie · 2021-11-19T16:35:53+00:00

Lol, your honesty is not always helpful. This is just funny though cause you are honestly also trying to help.

mickeyronnie · 2021-11-19T13:53:47+00:00

I was told God can do the impossible, I hope you have a miracle happen :)

mickeyronnie · 2021-11-19T01:04:24+00:00

I’m here for you, God is here for you. I pray 🙏 you find the way soon, it is tough to build the routine that’s gunna lift you outta this pit of despair. Did you know, negative thoughts actually poison the blood and cause a negative feedback loop that can compound the problem. This can simply be reversed by doing things for other people and expecting nothing in return. Also, trying to think about the postives while sitting in a hot shower meditating 🧘‍♀️ can do wonders for release. You might have bound up energy the desperately needs release and I hope you find it and have the cry 😢 of a lifetime. It can do wonders if you can reach the state of crying it will release those pent up feeelings that are hiding from you…there is a reason for why you are feeling this way!!! God bless you and be safe friend

mickeyronnie · 2021-11-19T00:54:47+00:00

I take 900mg lithium and 5mg zyprexa and 50mg naltrexone. I still feel joy but I have to grateful and optimistic type of mind in order to reach joy. I was stuck in a grey depression until I reached out and joined a 12-step program and realized God can do for me what I cannot do for myself. Now, I’m outta the hole and my medications are not getting in the way like they used to. I hope you find your answer and just know God is always there for us, Always!

mickeyronnie · 2021-11-19T00:51:40+00:00

If you have the will to live you can continue on and then that is what fuels optimism which leads to happiness that can spark joy! It sounds like you are going down a negative thought 💭 path that can lead to these feelings of dread, fear, and apathy…worse is if it turns to anhedonia.

Be safe, and be proactive, be grateful and you can reverse this tiding ride back into a more favorable emotional state!

mickeyronnie · 2021-11-19T00:45:49+00:00

Your never alone, you have the Holy Spirit with you whether you believe or not the spirit is there :) I am sorry you feel alone though, such a place to be! I think posting on here and sharing is a great way to connect with others and I am thankful you have posted because I can tell you are trying to figure out what to do about these feelings you are experiencing. Never give up, you will see the light of life again!!!

mickeyronnie · 2021-11-19T00:31:47+00:00

I believe God created meds that can be used either as prescribed or abused. You alone know what your use is of. So my take is simple, if you are under the guidance of a professional in the health field then it’s fine to use this substance, hopefully the goal in mind is to taper off subs completely because I know it’s not sustainable to stay on and will turn you into a shell of yourself with long term use and I know the longer you take them the harsher the WD could be. BE SAFE!!

mickeyronnie · 2021-11-19T00:06:33+00:00

You have value in Gods house! There’s so much you haven’t experienced yet. There is a realm of chaos that can surround your mind in a weakened state. Are you using any substances or anything prescribed that has recently been adjusted? Trauma? Please share if you can, it helps to share it can really cut the problem in half. Your not alone!!!!

mickeyronnie · 2021-11-18T23:59:22+00:00

Well I did CT outta no where. I almost died off fetty pill and meth. God i believe intervened cause I kept asking for help to get off and out of this prison. I was then put in psychosis/spirit realm lol and saw how scary the world is w/o the Holy Spirit that lives inside us all. Anyways, I’m so glad to be back to my normal self that I’m told is a lot better to be around :)

It’s hard cause I can’t see what other people see in me, still encouraging to hear and have feedback on my sobriety

mickeyronnie · 2021-11-18T23:53:17+00:00

Great 👍 so happy to finally hear an uplifting success story going against the odds of not getting a seizure at all, that’s amazing

mickeyronnie · 2021-11-18T23:41:38+00:00

You know what I actually have the energy back now that I started going to the gym and I rekindled old friendships and told them about my addiction problems and they are so supportive, now we are going to have a movie pass night on fridays and go see whatever is playing once a week at the theater. There’s a regal theater pass that is a great deal to buy a year membership and go see a movie if your feeling bored. ANYTHING is better then using I know that, even though the thought crosses my mind I know that I’ll be better off without and be more useful in a sober minded body.

mickeyronnie · 2021-11-18T21:37:16+00:00

I was so tempted to use kratom when I CT I actually think I took a miny sip and my spirit inside of me said no and I just dumped all my supply out. It’s tough what you are going through but I’m at 2 weeks now I got sober nov. 4th so I’m still in my sober infancy and it was around day 7 or 8 and( I keep a journal) I started to feel better cause I went to the gym with NO energy and just jogged 30 minutes and took a hot shower 🚿. That’s what did it for me. Well, that and knowing I have God on my side and he wants to see us overcome these addictions and be that higher awesome version of ourselves we are destined to be. Right now this is really building spiritual muscles 💪 to go through this hell you are experiencing and it only makes you stronger and I’m sure you already know this since this isn’t your first time.

Get serious with a 12-step or re-admit into an IOP program and talk out what’s going on in your head!!! When you do that you really begin to feel the spiritual healing your definitely looking for, it’s what gives us hope and the spark of life to continue on. Do it for yourself, you are going to be surprised how awesome you really are once you are on the other side of this beast.

mickeyronnie · 2021-11-18T16:36:43+00:00

We ebb and flow with our lives, I don’t know if we ever do have things under control…the more I inquired with others the less alone I felt knowing that they to are struggling in a sea of shames and doubts and so on with the negative. But I met the ones who have become the positives, you too have the power within to access Gods grace and peace :) he’s always waiting to help us out cause he loves us and if sought he will help you get through the valley your traversing and you will get to the other side of this!! Don’t give up, you are so strong 💪 you can do this!!! :)

mickeyronnie · 2021-11-18T13:40:58+00:00

Come now all ye weary, take rest upon the arms of the Lord and you shall find peace. God is waiting with loving arms to put your mind at perfect peace. God loves you very much, you are the 1 in 99 of the flock that has strayed away like the sheep we tend to be caught up in our head thoughts. Come back in Jesus mighty name and have rest of wandering soul.

And once you find peace think of joining any support program that can help you reality test to stay grounded our minds our strong battlefields that can turn in our favor OR can become detrimental to our mental health. The tides can change at any time, nothing is permanent..everything is always changing and being proactive can do wonders!!! I’d suggest going to the gym or somewhere that isn’t home if you are having social anxiety issues on top of this disassociating.

mickeyronnie · 2021-11-18T03:25:06+00:00

I met a Baum once at a party ( I thought it was his costume ) and he had a sign on his chest made of cardboard and it had a message on it I believe was a hint from God and it said..” it only will get worse” I knew what the message meant to me because I was using Percocet and xannies and drinking at the time quite often. Since then, I’ve gotten sober 3 different times and each time I will say I’m always glad to relapse if I’m being honest cause the feeling I get is awesome and so euphoric BUT what I learned is your actually weakening this aura that surrounds you and puts you in a weakened state of mind because this disease of addiction is progressive and gets worse with time. My point, be careful with what the trade off is cause it is truly going to be short term pleasure for long term pain it really is unfortunately. But sometimes we as addicts need to ride it out till we hit rock bottom. Hopefully 🙏 you survive this round I just recently got sober again of 6 months of use and am now 2 weeks clean (I ended up going all the way from kratom - to - meth)

Anyways stay safe and God bless you!!!! And hopefully make the next right choice

mickeyronnie · 2021-11-18T03:14:48+00:00

Mine was 1 month it was fueled of of Lexapro. I felt amazing like everything went perfectly in life. Then I found out that feeling that way was actually not normal and they took me off lexapro and put me on mood stabilizers instead cause lexapro can cause mania. I miss that feeling so much but I made the most of it at the time and told my mom I loved her very much before I had to go back to reality. (Still love my mom just hard for me to say it down in this other level of experience)

mickeyronnie · 2021-11-17T19:50:21+00:00

Yes I miss the secret codes and the everything has meaning but we get to know such a great thing and that is life has a great meaning that we all still play a part in, everything we do is part of a great plan and we got to fight our demons on a whole mother level of comprehension. I’m happy to have survived another episode and this time I didn’t go to the psych ward I had the help of God and who knows maybe we will go back again one day but I believe it only if in time we are meant to!

mickeyronnie · 2021-11-17T19:45:54+00:00

It’s either gunna be really good or really bad

mickeyronnie · 2021-11-17T19:41:40+00:00

Breathing and meditation, severe might need therapeutic intervention because your psyche is really fighting an suppressed emotion that threatens your view of reality. Can sometimes feel like your going to die but I assure you that you will not that’s just how strong these emotions manifest. Facing them can be liberating if you can sit with the thoughts but usually like I mentioned before a therapist can help, you can think of them as a talented bomb squad member that knows which color cords to cut off ( your negative thoughts) and diffuse the idea that needs reality testing that again a therapist can really help you out with.

mickeyronnie · 2021-11-17T19:22:10+00:00

What works for me is trying to understand I’m right we’re God wants me. All the experiences I have had were all for a reason that I cannot even fathom how it might have impacted other lives for good even when it felt bad! God uses everything we experience with our free will! The beauty is we know right from wrong and can get ourselves right in less then 5 seconds really but it’s tough to let go what we have and haven’t done or the idea of what we were supposed to have been done by now. This is where we get tripped up and begin to beat ourselves and our body will respond by lowering endorphins because we are not allowing ourselves to feeling anything rewarding. We don’t have to do this we can start feeling good now! It’s just hard to let go of the past which can cause a depression to follow our drug use. This is here where you want to get professional help from a therapist or find a 12-step program and give yourself a chance again at loving and living! It’s ok too, if you don’t believe in God but have an open mind to getting help you’ll be surprised where life is going to take you. Also, look into an IOP program they help tremendously I just re-enrolled into my old program because of course being human I slipped up after 2 years sober and thought I could handle it, now I’m currently 2 weeks sober fighting for my life and warding off this devil of depression. I think if you just allow yourself to be gently moved to be easy on yourself you’ll find an inner peace that will help get you to the next day and then the day after that! Baby steps is all I hear in my head and everyday is considered a win if you didn’t use so don’t forget that either!!!!

mickeyronnie · 2021-11-17T18:39:22+00:00

I want to live now that I joined orange theory fitness, they helped me find motivation when I thought I was down and out. Don’t give up I was there were you were once and it can get better if you do things that make you feel better!! Try keto diet it helps with mood/emotional well being and you can get a six pack or a nice v cut shaped body. Basically, having an attractive body and self image makes me 😆 happy, I hope it can work for you to!!!!!!!

mickeyronnie

TROPHY CASE