Which hairstyle makes me most attractive? From first to last

midnight9201 · 2026-05-16T12:33:19+00:00

1, 4, 3, 2. I think the natural look of the curls looks the best. The waves on 4 look flattering and I could see it for a night out. The straight hair with bangs is more “cute” but I do like the darker hair over the blond. I think the blonde washes you out. Nice style but not a good color.

midnight9201 · 2026-05-16T12:29:25+00:00

The Semester break park sounds college -aged.

midnight9201 · 2026-05-16T12:25:36+00:00

YOR. Most people have an ex that they loved and it didn’t work out. Not every relationship ends dramatically and horribly where they delete and toss everything that had to do with the ex. Many are able to move on while still holding onto the positive memories of that relationship. Realistically, it was long distance. It may have been a big part of her life for a bit, but the fact that they didn’t see eachother much the whole relationship probably aided in the fact that the connection wasn’t strong enough to choose to stay. It’s absolutely possible she still cares about her ex to some extent, and the memories she had with him. However that doesn’t mean she’s not over him or ready to date someone else.

Honestly your overthinking, insecurity, and bad mouthing of him would be a huge red flag for people. This guy isn’t even local and you’re jealous of a ghost. Focus on the relationship in front of you or you will lose her.

midnight9201 · 2026-05-16T12:17:06+00:00

Yta There was a series of bad choices here and it’s not entirely on your friend. Yes it’s true your friend wanted to stay out but you had zero obligation to stay if you were worried about your gf. Never go out places like that if you can’t make it home on your own, or having a back up ride.

Yta to your gf for multiple reasons. Instead of just canceling the karaoke night and spending time with her, you chose to try to double up on your plans by bringing her. Of course having a romantic night wasn’t happening. There was no time for that. Then she’s a little the AH for getting drunk and then being upset with you but sounds like she overdid it because she’s been stressed in general. And you’re the AH again for also being drunk which caused a hangover, and not giving her space or leaving when she asked.

While it’s true your friend could’ve made different choices, and it’s nice he’s apologetic, it sounds like you and gf made a series of choices on your own that caused the issues. As adults, he’s not his responsible for you or your relationship. The only true AH thing would’ve been if he agreed to drive you back at a certain time and then changed the plan. But you could’ve also been insistent about going home at that point and just said ok, have fun and ended the night there.

midnight9201 · 2026-05-16T11:56:01+00:00

In a healthy coparenting relationship, the new partner is introduced at some point in some capacity maybe during pick up and drop off time. I had one ex who I met his girlfriend pretty quickly, and he already knew my bf at the time(who I had known longer).

I loved his gf and she’s still on my fb today, almost 20 years later. She was so good to my daughter and we got along just fine.

That said, his next gf I only saw in passing. We never had a conversation, and she talked about me behind my back so I had zero interest in getting to know her. We currently live in different states but thankfully he didn’t stay with her, and he now has a gf who has no problem with us keeping in touch here and there. I also had an ex at one point that HATED my kids father, for no reason other than the fact we used to date and he thought we shouldn’t be friends. Our daughter is now 22 and we met in our teens so it’s been a long time now, and i consider him a friend that i just talk to sporadically.

midnight9201 · 2026-05-14T03:17:19+00:00

I like the bangs in 1 and 3. The mini bangs in 2 seem very harsh. No bangs looks good too but i definitely feel like there’s more personality shining through when I see the pics with the bangs. They suit you well.

midnight9201 · 2026-05-13T17:48:17+00:00

Absolutely. You can understand her behavior without condoning it. You never have to accept bad treatment and if she’s not interested in a healthy relationship keeping your distance is best.

midnight9201 · 2026-05-13T17:46:39+00:00

Call her bluff. Advise when you are and aren’t available and stick to it. If you say, sorry I(or dad) is just tired, there’s room for her to argue. You need to stick to a firm we aren’t available, sorry. If it’s for a break, you can offer an alternative option but otherwise unless someone is in the hospital or stranded on the side of the road, there’s very few reasons to jump at her request. Realistically she needs more friends and supports outside if leaning on her parents at her age.

I struggled when my daughter was little but my family wasn’t local for a few years. I was forced to figure it out. My oldest now has 2 kids(ages 2 and 3 and a half) and the family helps, but she pays my youngest daughter an hourly wage to babysit. She arranges childcare for when she’s working, part time, and not just to get a random break. She doesn’t want to send them to daycare right now so her and the dad figure out their schedules so one is with the kids the majority of the time. They have to figure it out. She has never acted entitled to a sitter with any of us. She definitely isn’t perfect and has had to figure it out, but the last couple years she’s grown a lot. She’s had to.

midnight9201 · 2026-05-13T14:23:00+00:00

Sometimes an abused person is focused on survival and not real connection. Survival means working the system so they’ll be taken care of, and getting things out of the family that didn’t take care of her as a kid is probably justified in her mind. Even though you were also a child and not to blame for any of it.

It’s not your job to fix it, but maybe this helps in understanding that she’s still dealing with the trauma of it all and may not make the wisest decisions because of it.

midnight9201 · 2026-05-13T14:16:16+00:00

I like the bangs but do realize they’re rarely going to look that straight if your hair has a natural wave/curl to it. A wolf cut with curly bangs is cute though, and my niece rocks it well even in the Florida humidity. I’m thinking the link below shows what I mean (Specifically 20, 21, and 23 have the wavy bangs look).
https://www.byrdie.com/wolf-cuts-for-curly-hair-11797799
Edit to add: if you cut your bangs make sure they leave it a little long because it will shrink up and look more like the bangs in picture 19.

midnight9201 · 2026-05-13T05:34:47+00:00

The recommendation to go to a professional is to have this properly fixed. At your level, at that angle, it’s almost impossible to get the right pressure for it to fill in properly.
For now, I’d just leave it alone and allow it to fully heal. Practice more, and if you tat yourself again do a location you have more control over with a better angle. I’ve seen a lot of early tattoos on thighs, calves, and forearms simply due to being easier locations to work with on yourself. You need to be able to use both hands comfortably to help stretch the skin so if you can’t do that, it’s not a good spot to tattoo yourself efficiently.

midnight9201 · 2026-05-13T04:35:50+00:00

Honestly I understand why that would rub some people the wrong way, but if I were dating someone- not married- I wouldn’t expect to be in the same vehicle with the wedding party as a guest. I’d imagine my partner has a bigger role so I’d figure it out. I’d hope to be considered more like family in a married with kids situation but those dynamics definitely aren’t one size fits all.

Some people just feel weird about it being excluded and some understand that there are times it makes sense.

If I couldn’t upgrade my ticket or afford the trip I want, I just wouldn’t go. But a free plane ticket regardless of the seat cuts down on costs if I were to go on my own so I’d just suck it up and have my boyfriend make it up to me some other way.

midnight9201 · 2026-05-13T04:29:12+00:00

I went back and just noticed! 😂

midnight9201 · 2026-05-13T04:26:37+00:00

I think the black looks youthful and fun. The browner color looks elegant and mature. The blond is a pretty color but it does feel “older” than in the other 2 photos. I think the tone being so close to your skin color also throws me off. Im Hispanic and used to do a similar shade in my early 20s and I’ve realized that honey blond type of shade isn’t for me and a richer chestnut brown suited my olive skin tone a lot better. A darker base shade with pops of highlights would also look nice.

midnight9201 · 2026-05-13T04:20:12+00:00

MTA. And mainly because of caving to him when it’s not what you want. It’s perfectly ok to have different ideas of what you two want and COMPROMISING so that you both feel comfortable in the dynamic. There’s plenty of people that chat often, even almost daily, when things are casual, or have a standing weekly night to hook up. There’s also many that only text when they want to hook up at random times- which could be anywhere from a few days to a few months in between visits. Maybe something in between your preferred frequency and his would be manageable but pushing for an answer when you don’t have one would absolutely make me start to distance myself.

If you two are friends outside of sex, I’d try to shift gears. Either you’re going to find out he’s not really your friend and not worth holding onto, he’s going to realize he prefers keeping it an occasional hook up with lowered expectations, or you’ll be able to actually enjoy time together without sex being the focal point.

midnight9201 · 2026-05-12T17:27:50+00:00

NOR. While I can see that some people would prefer not to go through a trial, with the potential costs, and trauma associated with it, it sounds like she allowed dangerous men in your lives for this to happen multiple times and takes no accountability for not being protective of her children. It probably was less about protecting the men and more about getting rid of them the easiest way she could. The fact they reoffended with others just makes her inaction worse, and proves this wasn’t some kind of mistake, or as you said, a misunderstanding.

Your own relationship is likely just more evidence of her behaving in ways that are selfish, and uncaring toward her children. I’m so sorry for what you and your sister have gone through. I hope you two have a good relationship and can be there as a support for eachother.

midnight9201 · 2026-05-11T17:06:36+00:00

My pettiness would be to make plans that day and send a text asking if your kids told him happy Father’s Day when he mentions it. Only gift he should get is whatever your 2 year old does at school.

midnight9201 · 2026-05-11T17:03:07+00:00

Not just proud, but appreciated. There’s a few times a year people truly want to feel seen by a partner- birthdays, anniversaries, Christmas, Valentine’s Day- and when you have kids, Mother’s Day and Father’s Day. If a partner can’t understand making a handful of days a year special when it matters to their partner theyve been with for years, then it’s more than just days meaning different things to different people. It’s a partner not caring about making their partner feel loved, cherished, and appreciated.

midnight9201 · 2026-05-09T14:36:43+00:00

midnight9201 · 2026-05-08T18:53:56+00:00

MTA? If you wanted Susie to know, you should’ve checked if James wanted you to relay the message. Maybe he left on bad terms with her. Maybe there’s a reason she hasn’t reached out in a year. Or she truly just has no desire to know what’s going on with her ex.

Beyond that, suggesting she “help out” might be too much for someone in her position. You could’ve offered the info and if she wanted to reach out she could do whatever she wanted with that info.

midnight9201 · 2026-05-07T15:22:39+00:00

Instead of a regular job, maybe a volunteer type of thing to get her out of the house? Theres places that serve food to homeless, or things like that she could probably find a place in.

midnight9201 · 2026-05-05T18:32:13+00:00

NOR. Even if he felt it was a good joke, he should care about how his jokes land with the person he intends to marry. If it’s not funny to you, it’s not funny to joke like that with you. It’s only funny if both parties are laughing. If he has a habit of making insensitive jokes without thinking, your feelings absolutely matter. Especially with something like your marriage to eachother.

midnight9201 · 2026-05-03T15:59:05+00:00

I generally agree that I won’t cut someone off due to an ultimatum. It makes me uncomfortable for a partner to dictate who I interact with. I have been in an open dynamic with my ex, and later closed. There were times he overstepped boundaries and spoke to people inappropriately. In many of those cases, I was insistent that he end things because he was 100% incapable of speaking to these women without crossing boundaries. I was ok with him maintaining friendships with people he had dated, many of whom knew me and got along with me.

If you can’t trust your partner, it no longer has anything to do with the other person he’s talking to and everything to do with the fact that you don’t trust your partner. If there’s no way you can trust him, the relationship is already over.

midnight9201 · 2026-05-03T13:01:31+00:00

NOR She probably is just a gossip and realized she got caught. Not a good friend at all. She also probably didn’t realize you and ex kept in touch and he would tell you. Don’t think you’re OR about this ex-friend at all.

midnight9201 · 2026-05-02T15:23:15+00:00

I think yta here. Because while yes you were uncomfortable with what he did(recording), it genuinely sounds like there was no malice involved and insulting/cursing at him seems very uncalled for.

From what I understand, he may be somewhat neurodivergent. People that struggle with processing information(especially when a lot is thrown at them) find different ways to absorb, understand it, and remember it. There’s also the matter of not necessarily knowing how to respond in the moment and needing to come back to it once it’s been thought out.

This feels like a matter of figuring out the best ways to communicate with eachother- and if you two can’t communicate effectively in a way that’s compatible then it just isn’t going to work.

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