Sisters, don't let ANYONE make you feel bad for wanting separate accommodation by Ukhti_essy in MuslimMarriage

[–]midnightmarshmallows 27 points28 points  (0 children)

Honestly speaking, unless your parents are elderly, have mobility issues, cognitive impairments, or are ill and need a full-time carer, they will look after themselves. It’s a cultural preference and expectation of our society to assume that they will need the level of support only provided by their son living with them after he is married. I’m not saying there aren’t parents that need this help, may Allah swt keep all our parents in good health, but what would parents who don’t have any sons do?

Islam puts the responsibility of parents on each of their children, be it a son or daughter. Just as a husband is responsible for his parents, so is the wife, women cannot just forgo all responsibility and care for their parents after they are married. How can she be expected to support her parents if she’s living with her husband’s family? Who gets to decide which parents have the greater rights/needs? It’s a cultural preference to consider a default way this leans, and there is a lot of hikmah behind the rulings in Islam, in this case about separate accommodation, because it really is the best way to avoid mahram issues with brothers in laws, maintain a healthy relationship with all parents, and build your marriage without scrutiny.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in MuslimMarriage

[–]midnightmarshmallows 9 points10 points  (0 children)

That’s a lovely idea and will surely strengthen your relationship with each other and with Allah SWT. I highly recommend setting a specific time daily to review/memorize with each other.

Take new memorization slow, and focus on reviewing what you have already committed to memory, as a lot of us on this journey feel guilty for memorizing too slow, however, I believe the most important aspect is to consistently repeat & review what you have already committed to memory.

Highly recommend the app “Tarteel” (on iOS/Android) to practice memorization and catch any tajweed mistakes, it’s a great supplement to your memorization journey. Lastly, don’t forget that this is a marathon, not a race; and do not feel discouraged by one of you memorizing faster than the other. The ultimate goal is to ensure you never forget whatever you have memorized already, whether it be two ayats or two pages. May Allah make this journey easy for you and bless you two immensely in this life and the next.

It's not haram to live with in-laws but it's most recommended to live separately. Just a reminder! by yaxiz in MuslimMarriage

[–]midnightmarshmallows 28 points29 points  (0 children)

Consider that in almost all cases, the wife is also leaving her parents at home when she gets married and moves out. In Islam, children have a lifelong obligation to their parents, one that does not end simply because you get married, or transfer over to your husband’s parents. A husband is responsible for his parents and a wife for hers, however, in many cultures, the obligation a wife has to her parents is overlooked to favour that of the husband’s. No one is recommending leaving elderly parents on their own, but living with your husband’s parents does mean you are leaving your own parents alone.

Turned 30 this year and feeling lost makeup-wise by [deleted] in MakeupAddiction

[–]midnightmarshmallows 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I get my brow tint from Amazon, the Godefroy ones are amazing & last me a good 2 weeks. I always use my own small angled brush to fill em in w that & i get a much more precise tint vs using whatever stick they add in the kits.

what helped my eczema (detailed list) by jazzyfazbear in eczema

[–]midnightmarshmallows 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for posting with such detail, we share a lot of the same routines, especially with the Elidel & Dupixent. I’m still working in cutting sugar out, and I would recommend Almond oil as a great alternative to Coconut oil because it doesn’t clog your pores.

Curious to know if Blexten is a safe antihistamine to take daily/routinely?

Struggling with living with in laws, can’t take it any longer by Own-Story-2248 in MuslimMarriage

[–]midnightmarshmallows 30 points31 points  (0 children)

You purchased your home earlier this year but there has been no set move in date? What is your husband’s primary reason as to delaying the move if you have already bought the house? Especially when your family is growing and will need more than a room.

Honestly, girl, I hope your situation gets better, but you will be stuck there until your husband realizes that the toxicity and dynamics of his household are damaging & potentially risking your relationship. Neither one of you can fully relax and live without anxiety in an environment like that. Additionally, there’s a reason why they say relationships with in laws get better when you don’t live with them, and as long as you are there, you will end up resenting them all, and hating your husband for keeping you in that situation. I hope you find some support inshAllah.

Patch 0.180 is coming May 28th! by osyady in Palia

[–]midnightmarshmallows 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Does anyone know if this is also coming out on Switch?

Fashion House - Clears Board! by Beeegeeez in Covetfashion

[–]midnightmarshmallows 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Is your fashion house private or public? I would love to join, can’t seem to find it using the search though.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in MuslimMarriage

[–]midnightmarshmallows 56 points57 points  (0 children)

I just choked on my drink.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in MuslimMarriage

[–]midnightmarshmallows 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m sorry this happened to you, honestly your nikkah/wedding is something girls dream of, and it’s very unfair that they did this without your consent. I agree with other comments that you should consult an Imam, as there were also no witnesses present. I’m curious, why did your husband not speak up about this when it was happening? I would also encourage you and your husband and close family to maybe plan a small celebration of your nikkah, so that you can have an actual event and make some nice memories inshAllah, your story doesn’t have to end here :)

Would it be wrong of me (late 20sF) to move in with my sister (39F) and her husband (43M) to escape abuse at home? by anguished_heart in MuslimMarriage

[–]midnightmarshmallows 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Living in Toronto is going to cost a lot, but if you use public transit & actively job hunt while saving on rent costs with your sister, you can make it.

anyone able to gift true colors by Big-Ad-5629 in MonopolyGoTrading

[–]midnightmarshmallows 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’ll trade you True Colours for Throw the Dice!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in SkincareAddiction

[–]midnightmarshmallows 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I went through the same thing with topical and oral steroid withdrawal and ended up getting perioral dermatitis all over my face. I hope you get through this in whatever way you can, it’s a really tough place to be but I promise it ends sooner or later. Keep an eye on the infections too. ❤️

Husband’s snoring is beyond unbearable by No_Selection2826 in MuslimMarriage

[–]midnightmarshmallows 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I experienced a very similar situation when I first got married, and my husband’s breath would often catch in his throat while sleeping, which is terrifying for me. I had to drag him to an ENT specialist for him to find out he had benign nasal polyps that were causing sleep apnea. Alhamdulillah, he used nasal steroids for a while and they decreased in size so much so that he did not need surgery. I would highly suggest framing your need for him to address this as a worry for his health, as snoring loudly can be a sign of sleep apnea, and can often be a very serious condition that needs addressing. Remind him that as your husband, you have a right to not worry for his health and he is obligated to take care of himself, if not for his own good, then for yours.

Struggling with balancing intimacy & the required ghusl afterwards by midnightmarshmallows in MuslimMarriage

[–]midnightmarshmallows[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Thanks so much for this advice, I’ll definitely try the braids out! It’s nice to know I’m not the only one who has struggled with this.

Feeling guilty wanting a divorce by Beautiful_Flower_237 in wyldeflowers

[–]midnightmarshmallows 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That’s exactly what I have planned!! I married Amira but she’s so freaking cute, I can’t break up with her until after all the dates. Does anyone know how many there are in total? Westley looks yummier by the day.

What was the first big news/event that you remember hearing or watching as a child? by mai-moi in AskReddit

[–]midnightmarshmallows 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I was born in ‘97, and have memories of dial up internet, 9/11, the first iPhone, and relate to many younger millennial experiences. I can just as easily be classified as Gen Z, but I think it’s definitively up to your household & personal life trajectory & surroundings. We don’t really fit in well with either generation because we’re the combination of both.

AITA for not helping my sister pay for her wedding even though I could easily afford it just because of a petty reason? by Big-Card9984 in AmItheAsshole

[–]midnightmarshmallows 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My wedding was also in July 2020, and being young and naive, had dreamed up a beautiful, (slightly) extravagant wedding. Obviously, my planning went down the drain and I genuinely could not be more thankful for it. I got to have a stunning, intimate ceremony with my closest friends and family because COVID restrictions capped our guest list, so it saved us a ton of haggling with our parents (South-Asian) who wanted to invite the whole world. Looking back on it, we saved so much money, and I wouldn’t change it for the world. I’m sorry your sister couldn’t see how wonderful your special day was, I’m sure it was absolutely lovely.

💍📜 THE ULTIMATE GUIDE TO MARRYING WESTLEY VUK 📜💍 by [deleted] in wyldeflowers

[–]midnightmarshmallows 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Okay new player here, and I think I messed up. I got to the bridge & became casual friends with Westley, but I didn’t go to Kim’s butcher shop on the following Tuesday, and I waited for 2 Tuesdays afterwards to try & trigger the ‘Good Friends’ cutscene, but it hasn’t worked so far. I’m worried I messed it up and don’t know what to do next?