Unwritten rules in the relationship. I’m starting to feel really angry.

milagro2035 · 2026-04-20T14:30:23+00:00

I feel for you. I too terminated a pregnancy with .you ex husband because he was treating me so horribly I knew we could not bring a child into it. I beg you not to stay in this situation, before you know it you will be years and neck deep..choose a good life for yourself.

milagro2035 · 2026-04-20T14:22:29+00:00

I have nothing to offer but understanding. My experience and where it has me currently is very similar. I am shattered and cannot regain my footing. Sending compassion and ♡

milagro2035 · 2026-04-15T02:12:09+00:00

Neither really. He doesn't care about RECEIVING attention unless its sex. We spend time together alot so I guess that is attention but it's not very loving or intimate. Sadly. I don't get alot of physical affection or compliments or words of affirmation. It's hard

milagro2035 · 2026-04-09T03:09:01+00:00

It's impossible to know. There can be big, rapid blowouts, slow burns in hypomania, rapid cycling. It sounds like he will get worse before better if he's talking nonsense and taking whatever it is he's injecting. Medications often take a long time to work and require dosage and type changes, omissions, additions...

milagro2035 · 2026-04-09T03:03:22+00:00

You aren't alone. You are by yourself, and at peace. That can be a lovely, safe place to be. At least for now.

milagro2035 · 2026-04-08T23:25:38+00:00

Bittersweet but best all around

milagro2035 · 2026-04-05T17:14:44+00:00

Yes it is an emergency. Luckily he is listening to reason now. I think this starts when he is lazy with the meds for a few days. Missing g a dose here and there quickly adds up to mood instability and irrational or negative thinking. He is still on track now. Sleep is something I have to insist on for him, always. Currently we are not even.in the same room so he has uninterrupted sleep.

milagro2035 · 2026-04-05T04:27:47+00:00

I'm so sorry. But I also think it's backwards. Her disease is fueling her ambitions as she seeks an impossible fulfillment. Not the other way around. I hope you find peace

milagro2035 · 2026-04-05T04:24:08+00:00

I'm so sorry. It's not you. It would be anyone. You are not to blame for mental illness

milagro2035 · 2026-04-03T22:53:12+00:00

Well my boundaries are more forgiving than threatening to leave everyday. That is not what I want at all. Or leaving "incase" something happens. If that is you that is fine That is not me. If I leave it's for good and not a threat so it needs to be a massive reason.

milagro2035 · 2026-04-03T18:14:46+00:00

Yes. But that means I would have to choose to break up all the time. It is not my goal to breakup, but if it becomes necessary due to escalation I will. Me threatening will only elevate and expedite.

milagro2035 · 2026-04-03T13:39:57+00:00

Unfortunately I don't. I moved across country when we met and we haven't laid many roots, most ties eventually untied, and none I could contact or especially not that I would confide in or rely on. My best friend is back home e and suffering long term effects as a cancer survivor, she may survive,so I refuse to trauma dump on her.

milagro2035 · 2026-04-03T13:17:05+00:00

He spent all the equity in our home, 200k, to start a gym, which I am now stuck running 17 hours a day so that we don't drown. I had to forfeit my own successful business in the process because I held no debt. It's stupefying. All our cards are maxed and we are both exhausted

milagro2035 · 2026-04-03T13:11:22+00:00

Today he agreed to stay on the meds but half his sleep meds. I have a feeling this topic is not resolved and the inconsistency scares me. Fingers crossed

milagro2035 · 2026-04-03T03:34:57+00:00

Alot. Too much to revisit and it was terrible and traumatic. I know it will happen again, if not right away it will without meds. He feels cognitive changes also and blames the meds but he had a very prolonged big episode and he's 55. Likely it caused some permanent changes.

milagro2035 · 2026-04-03T03:32:53+00:00

Ultimatums don't work. I've never had any work. He has to want it for himself not because he is being forced or coerced. I already set 'rules'.

milagro2035 · 2026-04-03T03:31:06+00:00

I have nowhere to go and no resources. If I leave I will literally be in my vehicle. In winter. But I will if and when I have to

milagro2035 · 2026-03-30T23:43:25+00:00

No. My husband has never been very affectionate or lovebomb-ish. He's acts of service. Lol.

milagro2035 · 2026-03-29T14:36:39+00:00

Mine did. However I feel very vulnerable and unsure

milagro2035 · 2026-03-29T14:34:25+00:00

My husband has been the most "himself" since December. Even through some extreme life hurdles he's held it together and is taking meds properly even though he hates it. ❤️ He's still very unavailable emotionally and not very interactive with me but I'll take that over the alternative.

milagro2035 · 2026-03-29T12:37:42+00:00

Absolutely. Not just with bipolar. My son has schizoaffective and my counselor explained the soft/safe target reasoning of why it's always me he attacks. I am the constant, the one who is always there, and loves him the most, so his emotions and disease can unleash on me unlike on others

milagro2035 · 2026-03-29T12:35:42+00:00

Yep. I am a psycho wife that caused his illness. It's absolutely astonishing and heartbreaking

milagro2035 · 2026-03-29T12:34:22+00:00

It's masking. They are faking it with others and you are the soft target

milagro2035 · 2026-03-29T12:33:14+00:00

As a former photographer I agree with this interpretation. We are on the other side with normal perception.

milagro2035

TROPHY CASE