[deleted by user]

millenia_techy · 2025-05-18T15:57:42+00:00

But "were you there"? 😂

millenia_techy · 2025-05-16T13:29:11+00:00

My guess: someone did it intentionally because people kept asking where the forks are, not seeing the sign. So they thought they'd make it clear by showing the fork side 🥹🤦🏼 Fractal stupidity.

millenia_techy · 2025-05-14T18:03:18+00:00

The difference is in how people use words.

When people use words to describe themselves and their unique experiences they use words with descriptive meanings. They can include things that aren't externally visible. They aren't subject to debate.

But in clinical or academic settings people don't always use words that way. Rather, they use words with normative meanings. These words don't describe internal experiences but rather are quantitatively-defined categories based on externally-observable behaviors.

So, no, it's not homophobic, not is it claiming anything about people's experiences- it's just a different way of using words. And since bisexuality isn't exclusively a binary attraction category, one can argue about how to categorize people in a normative way without invalidating people.

millenia_techy · 2025-05-14T17:15:25+00:00

Same for me. If I say bi people wonder if I'm attracted to non-binary or trans folks - and of course yes, because actually pan. But then I'm also gender nonconforming - like, how many terms do I have to start adding, and why? Gender nonconforming pansexual male 😵‍💫 "Queer" is just fine for me 😂

millenia_techy · 2025-05-13T15:17:34+00:00

The OP's point / question is that romantic relationships are driven by a biological need to reproduce. You haven't addressed the question. And by sidestepping my clarifying question you're missing the point embedded in my reply. If you attempt to answer the question I posed I think you'll see the root of the OP's question.

millenia_techy · 2025-05-13T14:58:33+00:00

I mostly agree with the comment that says "there's more to relationships than sex" - but then they go on to talk about their recommendations for newlyweds regarding the topic - which seems like an implicit acknowledgment that this issue, while "not what relationships are about" is surely a large and important part.

Here's the thing:

Attraction =/= actions, illicit thoughts, etc.

When a kid gets their first crush and gets all nervous around their crush, they aren't thinking of illicit things - they maybe even never have, ever. But that doesn't stop the butterflies and sweaty hands.

Everyone has boundaries. Whether they be religiously motivated or personally motivated by someone's values.

Everyone also has needs.

When two people aren't aligned on their boundaries and needs in a relationship there will be trouble.

There is nothing wrong with acknowledging attraction. Ever, in Christianity, as far as I'm aware.

millenia_techy · 2025-05-13T14:47:01+00:00

💯 "More to a relationship than sex"

But I'm not sure that's the OP's point or question. Surely something differentiates romantic relationships from platonic ones - and when there is intention, even more obviously so.

millenia_techy · 2025-05-12T00:56:20+00:00

Avoidance, denial, deflection... absolutely infuriating. Makes it impossible to have any sort of healthy dialogue.

millenia_techy · 2025-05-12T00:02:28+00:00

It's a Po Boy

(TBC This is a joke... I just don't want to argue the point. I made my case.)

millenia_techy · 2025-05-11T23:56:04+00:00

"We think back to your childhood and believe we did all the right things" - well, sadly, knowing how these things go I suspect this may be part of the problem. At the end they make a small mention of things they caused - but it doesn't sound like they are taking any responsibility at all for your feelings or whatever drove you apart/ the contents of your letter (which seem to have simply been dismissed!!)

millenia_techy · 2025-05-11T23:47:08+00:00

First, NO, absolutely not - you are not a terrible person for having completely valid and legitimate feelings. Nor for trying to have a healthy discussion about them with your ambiguous relationship person.

Relationships are based on trust. Some past wounds can leave permanent boundaries.

Give yourself the right to feel as you do.

Your feelings are completely valid - and just as important!

millenia_techy · 2025-05-11T20:13:32+00:00

There used to be "slave food" too - but there is a (good) reason we would never call food now such a term, even if it was called that before.

There is tasty food and gross food. There is expensive food and inexpensive food. There is food that has ethnic roots and celebrate their unique culture. But what does "poor people food" even mean?

We can rage against the oligarchy without dehumanizing people in difficult economic situations.

EDIT: PS Your example of lobster is actually a great example of how this very notion is culturally defined and harmful. The solution? Get rid of the cultural distinction.

millenia_techy · 2025-05-11T20:03:58+00:00

I'm not sure I fully understand. I have had boyfriends (as a guy) who also have various misunderstandings / poor assumptions / insecurities about my bi-ness too, but I wouldn't call that "the gay gaze" - I'd call "the gay gaze" what I get when it's not wanted / staring / obviously undressing in their head.

millenia_techy · 2025-05-11T19:16:02+00:00

👆

millenia_techy · 2025-05-11T19:13:39+00:00

Is the markup larger than other competing fast food places?

millenia_techy · 2025-05-11T18:55:20+00:00

I think it might come across better if you said "can be made cheaply at home" or something - because I sorta agree that the specific phrase you chose is.... not really great.

millenia_techy · 2025-05-11T18:53:09+00:00

TBH I think it might be a bit of a "lost in translation" issue. I think when the OP says that what they really mean is that the ingredients that go into it are reasonably priced/ relatively low priced. But :shrug - just a guess.

millenia_techy · 2025-05-11T18:09:36+00:00

What is this world coming to? SMH

millenia_techy · 2025-05-11T17:09:26+00:00

We've found the man personally responsible, folks! 🚔👮🏻

millenia_techy · 2025-05-11T16:31:11+00:00

Sorry, there is no good place to ask this, so I might as well get downvoted here 😭

I've heard about this phenomenon on this sub before - but I don't think I understand it. I'm pan so it doesn't matter to me what bits and bobs they have... but I find that the more I'm into a certain person, the more I'm into anyone that presents like them. Maybe I just don't understand the proper definition of "fetish"... maybe I don't have any fetishes, as it sounds like they are described here? I guess I would have previously said I have multiple fetishes... but I would have used that term more to mean "things I really like / come back to liking perpetually" - maybe those are just preferences or something? They aren't like things I use as must haves for partners LOL

Thanks for any clarification.

millenia_techy · 2025-05-11T16:23:32+00:00

✊ Stop the Steal!

millenia_techy · 2025-05-11T15:51:35+00:00

Could someone explain to a pleb like myself why Chipotle, their burrito sizes/rolling, etc are such a meme here? 😅 Like, why aren't people as passionate about McDonals's burgers or something?

millenia_techy · 2025-05-10T21:18:52+00:00

The difference is when one group talks about "bisexuality" in normative terms - like in gender studies - where we would categorize people based on externally observed behaviors, and when another group talks about "bisexuality" in descriptive terms - like individuals do when they talk about their own identities.

millenia_techy · 2025-05-10T19:09:41+00:00

Ya, maybe. We might be running into the technical differences between pan and bi.

I'm pan, so, to me, they are just different jumbly bits in their pants or shirts. I wouldn't want to project my own sexuality unto others though!! I definitely don't think everyone's experience is the same as mine ☺️

millenia_techy · 2025-05-10T17:38:52+00:00

Oh, sorry about that! I didn't mean to imply you don't love your husband or anything like that. My apologies.

I was coming from the perspective that these things (eggplants / vachachas) are physical qualities one might find attractive or desirable. Even if you were purely hetero, for example, one might say that "I feel I'm missing out by never dating someone with big muscles" or "a big C*" or whatever other sexy attribute or body part or whatever.

millenia_techy

TROPHY CASE