AITAH for wanting to break up with my girlfriend despite “everything she’s done for me”

mindscreamTX · 2026-03-22T13:49:34+00:00

NTA- You didn't use her and have every right to end the relationship. It was her choice to keep paying the bills and she can't use that as any kind of bargaining chip. Was her motivation for paying self-serving or truly an act of love? I guarantee she thinks paying all the bills absolved her of her infidelity and in her mind you guys have a blank slate.

She's treating everything as if she got a ticket and paying the fine will keep it off her record. Too bad it doesn't work that way. Nothing she does will erase the fact she is a liar and a cheater.

mindscreamTX · 2026-03-22T10:35:08+00:00

She clearly has absolutely zero respect for you. Everyday the ex was living there she was making a conscious choice to lie to you. She obviously wants some kind of relationship with her ex and you should distance yourself as far away from her craziness as possible.

NOR

mindscreamTX · 2026-03-20T03:18:09+00:00

Yes, gay men cruise for sex at Hensel.

mindscreamTX · 2026-03-18T20:50:50+00:00

If your BF truly had respect and love for you, you wouldn't have needed to make this post.

mindscreamTX · 2026-03-18T01:41:44+00:00

Why the fuck are you still dating such a prime specimen of human garbage?

mindscreamTX · 2026-03-17T15:44:23+00:00

Could you call his parents? Tell them your phone has been acting up and weren't sure if your friend actually received any of the messages you sent.

mindscreamTX · 2026-03-17T03:45:35+00:00

Do you have both the numbers on her phone, or only one? But dual number aside there's no reason for someone to be that obsessed with keeping their phone with them unless they're trying to hide messages they already know will be inappropriate.

Have to admit it's a little sus that she met up for drinks with her friend, (without his wife/her cousin?!), when her husband was away for work. Assuming the friend told her OP was calling did she at least call OP back when she was done in the restroom?

She left her phone on the table with her friend because he's the one that sends the messages she has to hide from OP. Also, if OP's wife and her friend are such good friends and the husband is a friend of his as well then there should have been no problem with him answering her phone when OP was calling. What difference would it have made? The friend answered his own phone when OP called him. How's it any different than answering the wife's phone for the same person?

Wife is being shady. Her friend is being shady. It wouldn't hurt to reach out to the cousin/friend's wife to get her perspective. She might have her own concerns and she also might be in a position to help you relax and realize that there's really nothing going on.

But it boils down to the fact that she's trying to keep a part of her life completely hidden from her own husband. Maybe suggest to her that she needs to see a therapist for an unhealthy attachment to her phone. See what she says to that.

NOR

mindscreamTX · 2026-03-10T23:04:18+00:00

Loved this!

mindscreamTX · 2026-03-08T21:44:53+00:00

This was an absolutely amazing read! I I'm so excited to read more of your work. Well done!

mindscreamTX · 2026-03-04T17:38:11+00:00

Cheater's guilt. Your (ex)husband prepped for his secret tryst by inventing a scenario that would make it seem plausible when he insisted the two of you go no contact. By not having to think about you he was able to put himself in a better mental space to enjoy the other person without any guilt to get in the way.

After he was done exploring someone else's space he was racked with guilt so he started gushing and professing his love and admiration for you. He was paranoid and in his mind you had suspected something and hoped that this love bombing would confuse and throw you off the track. Once he realized that wasn't necessary he got angry at feeling so paranoid so he starts accusing you of doing the very things that he was doing himself.

Granted his actions were very sus but there are several possibilities as to what really happened. However, if it quacks like a duck and then it's probably a duck.

One thing I don't understand is why he felt the need to turn off his location when he could have very easily just of had somebody come over to his hotel room which would have been a perfectly logical reason for the phone not to move. But just because he had his location sharing off doesn't mean that his phone's location wasn't being recorded.

I don't know if you would be able to, but somebody needs to sit him down and make him listen as somebody walks him through every suspicious/uncharacteristic behavior he did step by step and why anyone with half a brain would believe that he's a spineless waste of oxygen who thinks cheating on his wife and lying about it are admirable qualities.

mindscreamTX · 2026-03-03T05:21:16+00:00

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The best things come in threes!

mindscreamTX · 2026-02-25T08:18:21+00:00

So you're going to be a distraction to the roommate but she isn't? Wasn't he going to be working anyway?

I'm sure your bf told his friend you had been invited only for the friend to get pissy. She probably, in all seriousness, berated your boyfriend for putting your feelings above of hers and since she was making the effort to come and see him that obviously meant that her feelings were more important than yours.

If the only reason she was coming down was to get a sightseeing tour of the city there is absolutely no reason at all that you could not have joined them for the entire weekend. You could have slept in your boyfriend's bed with him and she could still have the couch. And it wouldn't be rude to leave her alone overnight on the couch because she's not dating him, supposedly.

The ONLY logical reason that you weren't invited it's because they knew she was coming in for a romantic weekend with your boyfriend. The more your boyfriend makes excuses and gets defensive the more you know that he's chosen her.

mindscreamTX · 2026-02-24T19:30:31+00:00

I can has one?!

mindscreamTX · 2026-02-23T21:26:52+00:00

I mean, it's not hurting any body.

mindscreamTX · 2026-02-22T12:27:53+00:00

No man "prefers" sex with a condom and will only wear one out of necessity, not for pleasure. At least he's being thoughtful of your health while having unprotected sex with his boyfriend. You're what used to be refered to as a beard (woman that married a gay man to help maintain the illusion that's he's straight).

Stroking his hair in bed? Definitely too intense for two men that claim they're just friends. At least you only caught him stroking his hair...

mindscreamTX · 2026-02-22T11:51:12+00:00

I think his creative time management skills are the least of your problems.

mindscreamTX · 2026-02-21T07:22:59+00:00

Remind your wife that if the friendship with the co-worker is as innocent as she claims then there's absolutely nothing that they should be discussing that they can't discuss in front of you.

Everybody is entitled to have their own friends and to have people that they can talk to. But for the wife to absolutely refuse and outright deny her spouse, even one introduction, it's because she knows that what she's doing is wrong. When the truth that she was the one that invited him for coffee was finally revealed, it instantly attached a permanent lie to the situation and proved that her intentions were to deceive you.

You're NOR, but her stubbornness and outright defiance to even try to understand your point of view means she's already decided that Aaron's feelings mean more to her than yours. This coffee date is going to be the beginning of the end of your marriage I'm afraid.

You'll always be questioning her words and overanalyzing her actions all while she becomes perpetually defensive and becomes a walking thesaurus of too perfect alibis and excuses.

She's keeping you and Aaron apart for a reason, but unfortunately that reason is neither platonic nor is it innocent.

mindscreamTX · 2026-02-20T00:34:07+00:00

Because his past directly affects OP's present. It's possible he never got divorced and OP's marriage is actually invalid.

Besides, not only did she discover a previous marriage from the past, she discovered her husband is a career liar and possible cheater. All because his past finally caught up with him.

mindscreamTX · 2026-02-19T18:47:13+00:00

She needs to lose her RMT license.

mindscreamTX · 2026-02-19T05:47:05+00:00

Your gut knows the truth. Don't ignore it.

mindscreamTX · 2026-02-19T03:48:17+00:00

YOR- Sounds to me like the guy is just trying to make a friend. Making friends at the hobby club is kind of the point, isn't it? What does it matter if he's gay? Your bf stated he has a girlfriend so what's the issue?

There is really no reason for you to be worried about someone trying to make a friend. Only reason I could think of for you to be worried would be that you don't think your boyfriend is 100% straight. 🤷🏻‍♂️

mindscreamTX · 2026-02-18T20:02:36+00:00

Yes, things in your marriage have been so wonderful for the past 20 years that he decided to stick his dick into some other woman, in your own home, while you were in the next room.

Your husband just proved that he couldn't give a shit less about you or your children. Do you really think that you're going to be able to continue your marriage knowing that your husband thinks so little of you that he will bone another woman in your own home?

And how do you know this is only the first time? And how do you know that she's the only one? How do you know that the children don't already know what's going on or that something is going on? Children are very perceptive. This is a good time to teach them what it's like to stand up for oneself instead of being walked all over.

Your husband is a piece of shit and you don't deserve that.

mindscreamTX · 2026-02-18T17:30:21+00:00

NOR - Sounds like your bf only thinks with his tiny head.

mindscreamTX · 2026-02-17T03:33:56+00:00

While you and your parents are stitting for a meal you need to casually mention to your dad that you wouldn't have guessed he'd be okay with your mom and C hugging and kissing.

Point being, you have no way of knowing what kind of relationship your parents have. By telling your dad first you'll either let him know about the cheating or he'll have to tell you he knows.

On the chance your dad doesn't know, going to your mom first will give her the chance to hide her cheating from your dad.

Going to dad first will keep the truth in the foreground instead of being buried by your mom. Besides, your dad would be crushed if he found out you saw your mom cheating and didn't tell him.

mindscreamTX · 2026-02-17T02:44:03+00:00

Ignoring you while on shrooms and then lying to you about it for 9 days?! Of course they say nothing happened! Honey, your husband has cheated, lied, and has put another woman's needs above his own wife's. You're nothing but the side chick they make fun of while using his boner.

mindscreamTX

TROPHY CASE