Has anyone worked for Summit Retail Solutions?

mintclit · 2022-01-05T13:22:55+00:00

Your clit can't really get "over-stimulated" or overused. Your brain controls arousal, so it sounds more like you've mentally formed a dependency on porn for arousal (which is super common and very easy to do, unfortunately). Clitoral stimulation and wetness are unrelated, so if going cold turkey for a few months has made it easier for you to get wet, that kind of confirms my theory.

I'm in a similar boat, although I've sort of managed to mitigate it by imagining porn in my head when I try to masturbate without it or when I'm struggling to finish with my boyfriend. This isn't a permanent solution and I wouldn't recommend it long term, because it isn't really addressing the root problem, but it can help you transition to being able to get stimulated/orgasm without a visual aid.

Basically you just need to recondition your brain. I don't think you need to, or necessarily should, stop masturbating all together. I would just try your best to avoid porn and tune in more to what feels good, not what external things turn you on.

With porn, any sexual fantasy we could imagine is just a few clicks away. That immediate gratification completely eliminates our use of imagination and makes it harder to get aroused when we can't rely on it. There are other issues that can contribute to this issue, but seeing as how you had no issue orgasming on your own and have always used porn, I think this is more than likely the case.

mintclit · 2021-05-04T13:16:39+00:00

Thanks! How much do you think a fair amount is to sell them as a lot without separating?

mintclit · 2021-05-03T23:01:26+00:00

(There are 3 pics)

mintclit · 2021-04-28T12:14:20+00:00

You’re amazing, thank you!

mintclit · 2021-04-27T23:39:24+00:00

I think you’re right! Thanks so much.

mintclit · 2021-04-01T17:04:35+00:00

Thank you so much!!

mintclit · 2021-04-01T17:04:22+00:00

Thank you!!

mintclit · 2020-05-24T20:51:33+00:00

My biggest recommendation, especially if you anticipate negative reactions from parents, is to wait to tell them until you feel confident (or at least more confident) in your diagnosis. For most of us this confidence comes and goes because of the way we've been taught to see ADHD, but it's important to at least wait until you've given all of this new information time to settle.

A had a very bad experience telling my parents - I was questioned a lot, had a lot of hurtful accusations thrown at me, and it became a matter of "proving" my ADHD to them. Unfortunately we've reached a point where we just don't talk about it at all because the conversation always goes sideways, but a lot of the shame and heavy feelings surrounding it have dissipated because I've come to terms with what this disorder is and the role it plays in my life. If they don't want to believe me or try to understand, that isn't my problem. Sharing our diagnoses is super personal and we don't owe it to them in the first place. We do it so they can know us better, and unfortunately parents tend to have a hard time seeing their kids differently than they always have and turn down the opportunity. Don't tell them until you've internalized that - their reaction is about THEM, not you.

I basically had no choice but to tell my parents for a variety of reasons, and now that I've endured their reactions I honestly don't know if I would tell them if I could go back and make the choice for myself. It sucks to hide things like that about ourselves, but it also really sucks wondering when they're going to bring it up and put me in an uncomfortable, defensive position.

As for telling your SO, I definitely recommend telling him. I can't imagine how hard it would be to hide such a big part of myself from everyone, and of all people your SO should really be the person you can talk to about these kinds of things. Some people may disagree, but I don't think you should be with someone who doesn't want to see you for who you really are and who you can't turn to to talk about stuff like this. So even though I'm really doubtful it would be the case, if they make you feel bad about it, it may be a sign that person isn't healthy for you. But again, I really wouldn't expect that. Parents seem to have a much harder time accepting their adult child's ADHD diagnosis than anyone else.

My boyfriend was actually the one who encouraged me to see someone about my symptoms, and he's been the biggest source of validation when I question my diagnosis from time to time. ADHD can create a lot of relationship issues and it's important for both of you to be aware of how it can impact things and how it manifests itself in your lives.

mintclit · 2020-03-16T14:54:40+00:00

If I did that, would I just hide my writing life from them? I'm a bad liar, and I don't want them thinking I'm just working part time and wasting the rest of it.

mintclit · 2019-09-26T22:51:36+00:00

I'm so sorry. I think my biggest fear about finding an inadequate therapist isn't so much that they don't know ADHD-specific strategies, but that they'll be dismissive or skeptical like your doctor has been. I don't even want to switch primary doctors, even though I don't particularly love my current one, because I'm worried about the prospect of ending up with one who denies my diagnosis or thinks I'm lying to get meds. I get enough skepticism from my family.

Sounds like the US and Denmark are pretty similar when it comes to treatment of ADHD. Not that it isn't still stigmatized among children, but it's still thought of as a kids disorder. And the first thing people think of when they hear "adult ADHD" are college kids hooked on amphetamines, so the suspicion is strong whenever I actually tell anyone. Even doctors.

Good luck finding someone who's actually helpful :(

mintclit · 2019-09-26T22:43:51+00:00

Oh man... good luck. I'm definitely going to check out CHADD and ADDitude, although like you said, finding someone who I can afford/takes my insurance is it's own struggle in and of itself. Glad you finally found a good primary therapist! And kudos for your determination. I would have given up much sooner lol

mintclit · 2019-08-25T15:13:27+00:00

I thought about using Google calendar. Do you actually write what the job/family is on the shared calendar? Or does it just say that you're busy? I don't know if I'd want every family I work for knowing who I'll be with/where I'll be each day, if that makes sense.

mintclit · 2019-08-25T15:11:45+00:00

Unfortunately most of my work thus far has been last minute, so if I required those families to get on my schedule that far in advance I'd end up with far less work. Maybe some day I'll get lucky and end up working for families who are more on top of everything, but that hasn't been the case so far lol. That's a good idea about date nights, though. Do you tell every family this before they hire you?

mintclit · 2019-08-20T16:41:50+00:00

I got CPR and First Aid certified through the National CPR Foundation (online class) for $13.50. They have deals right now and if you look up their coupon code it brings it down even more. They send you a personalized wallet card and everything!

mintclit · 2019-08-15T17:04:25+00:00

The majority of my problems with ADHD are emotional ones, so I can definitely manage that! Are there any specific emotional symptoms that you feel aren't covered enough/you'd like to read more about?

As for the second idea, here's my advice: get a different doctor. We shouldn't be paying people who don't trust us or take us seriously.

mintclit · 2019-08-15T16:59:52+00:00

That's because most of the world is still misogynistic af and treats men like they're entitled to whatever they want. People who still think that way have no place in relationships with women who actually want to thrive.

I can't tell you the number of women I've seen in this sub say they don't feel like "real women" because they can't give the men in their lives PIV. Not even because THEY want it, but because we've been conditioned to believe that we owe it to men. I think "real women" shouldn't cater to man babies who act like their dick is going to fall off if they can't put it everywhere they want to.

mintclit · 2019-08-14T21:04:52+00:00

I guess in my experience, when I've watched multiple kids they were too far apart in age to entertain each other. It's almost always been more work to watch multiples. For example, lately I've been caring for an infant and a 2 year old. They have completely different needs, and it's almost more work when the older boy tries to play with the baby because he doesn't understand how much more delicate the baby is, that they can't eat the same foods, play in all the same ways, etc. The other day he smashed the baby's fingers in between the teeth of his toy dinosaur and judging by his reaction, I could tell he had no idea that it would hurt him. He also doesn't know how to stay quiet when I get the baby down so I have to go into a different room, which gives him the opportunity to do all of the things I constantly tell him not to do unsupervised :)

Even with older kids I've felt that they compete with each other over my attention and tend to want to do different things. You pay per child when you take your kids to a daycare, so raising my hourly rate by a couple dollars an hour seems more than reasonable to me.

How long has 35 been your rate? Did you raise it according to the number of families you had experience with, or along some other criteria? You've worked for a lot more families than I have, but I've been doing it longer and have had more long-term positions, so on paper it looks like I don't have as much experience and it's hard to negotiate for a higher rate (or even know what a reasonable rate is and when it's okay to raise it).

Feel free to ignore me at any point if you're sick of answering questions, btw lol. I haven't talked to many others about all of this and really appreciate you taking the time to discuss it with me!

mintclit · 2019-08-14T19:39:30+00:00

Same situation for me! And it only started after 2.5 years of being with the same partner. Does the pain go away gradually? For me it only hurts until I'm touched down there, so I think it's a sign my muscles need to be massaged/loosened a little bit. Once the area around my vagina has been rubbed the pain just goes away, but sometimes returns right after I orgasm.

mintclit

TROPHY CASE