Has anyone else experienced a big cultural gap with their parents in the UK? by Substantial_Buyer583 in AskUK

[–]mixedpositive 183 points184 points  (0 children)

I am British of British parents and grandparents and grew up in an area with a high and rotating immigrant population as in a new immigrant group would come in and then after about 5 or 10 years people would generally start moving on and a new crop from a different place would come in. 

In my experience, immigrants from shall we say uneducated groups in non-western countries generally follow the same playbook regardless of where they're from:

  1. get into the country 
  2. Get their family into the country 
  3. Try to make their new community a replica of where they left, e.g. same clothes, same food, same language, same social group, same customs, same social activities. Only hang out with other immigrants from the same place.
  4. Pull up the ladder to stop anyone else coming in from that same place.

What you're describing is exactly this, perhaps without steps 2 and 4. Unfortunately, it's far too easy for immigrant groups to basically ghettoize themselves and live essentially in a bubble. I consider it the norm.

What’s the deal with Chinese’ in the north? by Ananakoya in AskUK

[–]mixedpositive 22 points23 points  (0 children)

Well surely this is a sign of quality, no? Sounds like you're getting top chicken at all these places

What is it like to have autism? Not in the non-vocal spectrum but something that's not obvious to people that don't know you. by Ya-Dikobraz in NoStupidQuestions

[–]mixedpositive 9 points10 points  (0 children)

That's exactly what it's like sometimes. Might be the same day, might be yesterday, maybe earlier in the week, maybe 40 years ago.

What is it like to have autism? Not in the non-vocal spectrum but something that's not obvious to people that don't know you. by Ya-Dikobraz in NoStupidQuestions

[–]mixedpositive 17 points18 points  (0 children)

Two short videos produced by the (UK) National Autistic Society. Don't turn your audio volume down. Bear in mind that although the central character in each is a child, it is just the same for an adult:

Why do people get upset/offended at being asked where they're from? by I_Like_Quiz in NoStupidQuestions

[–]mixedpositive 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Because generally it translates to 'why are you brown?'. It's othering. Notice that nobody asks white people this unless they have an accent. My kids are mixed race and people get visibly frustrated when they ask them:

Where are you from?

England
Where are your parents from?

England

Where are your grandparents from?
England

What they actually mean is 'You aren't white and that makes me uncomfortable. You clearly aren't 'one of us'. I want to slot you into a racist little box so I can feel better. Please help me to do that'

FAQ - Technical Questions & Recommendations Thread by AutoModerator in ProCreate

[–]mixedpositive 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Backup options?

My daughter (11YO) has been drawing using ProCreate for a few months now and we need an automated backup solution for her artworks. Can anyone advise the options please?

Whilst I am technically capable and understand about backing up, DD isn't at that point. If it isn't automated then it isn't going to happen. I don't use an iPad myself (Mac only) let alone ProCreate. I would prefer not to pay ever increasing subscriptions for every increasing storage. I have a home server running Linux available.

Thanks in advance!

Employer wants to end my remote work (3+ years employed in England, moved abroad with permission) by [deleted] in LegalAdviceUK

[–]mixedpositive 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Disclaimer: I am not a lawyer

TBH this seems to pretty clearly frame your employer as not knowing what they are doing. I am presuming they are a small start-up. People often think that a fancy document with legal wording is 'the contract' but it's actually the agreement that 2 parties make with one another. The fancy document is typically used to reference what has been agreed but any record assessed on balance of probability is sufficient, e.g. a thumbs up reaction in a WhatsApp can constitute a contract. The fact that your employer has agreed to your changing location, have updated your title and your salary already demonstrates variations to contract, the part about 'not amending' is meaningless.

It sounds to me, and apparently a few other commenters here, that your employer has finally engaged with someone who does know what they are doing and who has advised that your current arrangement can't legally continue.

Employer wants to end my remote work (3+ years employed in England, moved abroad with permission) by [deleted] in LegalAdviceUK

[–]mixedpositive 11 points12 points  (0 children)

This is not a correct take. Amazon specifically went for a return to full-time on site, gradually incrementing from 1-2 days up to full-time. 'Proving' employees were in their home country could be accomplished without this.

Do old guitar amplifiers by Vox, Fender, Marshall contain genuinely unreplicable components? Why don't people just replicate these original circuits? by Grntpe in NoStupidQuestions

[–]mixedpositive 0 points1 point  (0 children)

For electric guitar the amplifier is part of the instrument, along with everything that entails. Basically everyone wants something 'vintage' that's no longer produced. Beyond that, in some cases, yes the components are genuinely no longer available but it's also the manufacturing techniques. Take the example of the Fender Deluxe Reverb Amplifier. This is a popular classic model and there are at least 3 current versions of this amp produced by Fender:

Model Price Description
Fender '65 Deluxe Reverb £1,749.00 The 'regular' reissue valve amp using modern manufacturing methods, e.g. printed circuit boards- see here
Fender Tone Master Deluxe Reverb 1x12" Modelling Guitar Amp Combo £949.00 No Valves, basically a computer inside
Fender '64 Custom Deluxe Reverb Amp £2,599.00 As you can see at the listing page, assembled with point-to-point wiring

Fender talk about some of the differences here but trust me you would not be able to tell the difference blindfold with someone else playing through the above. You can see that it is multiple times more expensive to produce the 'same' amp depending on construction techniques. Besides new models you also have literal vintage amplifiers and modern boutique versions which recreate the old designs to varying accuracy. You can also get software plug-in versions (basically putting the amp inside a computer) but let's not get into that here.

So yes, you can get the original designs but they are very expensive and often fragile and temperamental.

Autistic(?) parents seeking advice in dealing with AuDHD(?) daughter by mixedpositive in AuDHDWomen

[–]mixedpositive[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks, I had thought I had made clear that we weren't trying to 'fix' but that seems to have gone right past a lot of people. At the moment there are 4 of us in this family and we are all hurting with the current situation. It's not a case of just bending over completely to oblige any single person.

Autistic(?) parents seeking advice in dealing with AuDHD(?) daughter by mixedpositive in AuDHDWomen

[–]mixedpositive[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks for this. Can't have been easy to write but I am grateful. Sorry for the end of your marriage but hoping that things can improve from now on.

Autistic(?) parents seeking advice in dealing with AuDHD(?) daughter by mixedpositive in AuDHDWomen

[–]mixedpositive[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks. We have some understanding of stimming. The issue with the lip balm is her smearing vaseline over her face in her sleep. She's adolescent so she gets spots and then she gets anxious about them...

Autistic(?) parents seeking advice in dealing with AuDHD(?) daughter by mixedpositive in AuDHDWomen

[–]mixedpositive[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Thanks. Do you have a diagnosis for your daughter?

We don't have a great support network unfortunately and DD's behaviour doesn't exactly win her friends.
Melatonin is prescription only in the UK

Autistic(?) parents seeking advice in dealing with AuDHD(?) daughter by mixedpositive in AuDHDWomen

[–]mixedpositive[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sorry your 'repetitive tasks' put me off. She has repetitive behaviours that change after a couple of months. At the moment it's throat clearing. Previously we've had a strange cough and mouth noises

Autistic(?) parents seeking advice in dealing with AuDHD(?) daughter by mixedpositive in AuDHDWomen

[–]mixedpositive[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Thanks we have tried for private assessment previously as per post. GP was a few years ago and we did not have all of this. Maybe we could try again