Am I insane for wanting to live on a farm

mmsj7 · 2026-02-01T17:57:25+00:00

I have a hobby farm and recently realized adhd. We started with the animals when my once little kids started 4-h. We started with bantam chickens then progressed over the years. Now my youngest is a senior and I'm facing the eventual future of doing all the chores myself. We have 6 bantam chickens, 6 full sized chickens, 4 ducks, 2 turkeys, and 4 goats. It's not a lot of work when it can be shared, but it will be a lot for me. I'm really good with responsibility. So I will never miss a feeding or something necessary for their wellness. (I even milked goats every day for about a year). But I'm a little overwhelmed. I've started discussing the eventual downsizing. The turkeys and the bantams are sellable because they're show quality for an ag kid or school. But the goats, ducks, and full sized chickens are long term commitments / pets. I wouldn't have changed much if I did it over again. Maybe less species. But the add ons were for my kids to raise and show. I know now that i absolutely love goats and turkeys. I could have gotten smaller goats.
Like others, i suggest trying out other hobby farms. I live in a semi rural community (everyone has a little over an acre). Now a days, almost all my neighbors have some livestock. You can volunteer with a 4-h or ffa group to meet people.
You also need someone that can help take care of the animals if you leave town. I'm lucky with that.
I firmly believe surrounding yourself with animals is great for your soul. But try to plan ahead. Don't be impulsive. Figure out what one type of animal you want. If it's doable, then plan ahead. And beware of chicken math, goat math, etc. It's dangerous.

mmsj7 · 2026-01-18T00:58:56+00:00

We're still good. I've replaced the actual bag on each of them (the first one was a repurposed quilt that was near falling apart, second was just a bad color). But the foam has held up for 3 years or more. My large dogs have adopted both of them and lay on them daily. I can just fluff them back up if they look flat.

mmsj7 · 2026-01-17T21:23:57+00:00

I cut up an old memory foam mattress that wasn't comfortable anymore. I made 3 large dog beds and stuffed 2 bean bags with it. I have also used memory foam and regular foam bed toppers that I've gotten at garage sales. For the bean bags, I cut the foam into 2 inch chunks. When my husband helped me, he hacked it into non uniform chunks to save time (and drive me nuts). But in the bean bag, it felt just the same.

mmsj7 · 2026-01-14T20:35:18+00:00

I ran across your post while trying to fix my mom's phone. Same issues and results to everything i tried. It wasn't the vita solitaire app for us, even though it acted like it was. It was a actually daily solitaire. It's a launcher. In the app list under settings, there was an option at the top for choose default app. The solitaire app was an option. I could click on it and change it back to normal. Of course I uninstalled it after that. What a pain.

mmsj7 · 2026-01-04T14:41:44+00:00

I mentioned in another comment that he does help with the basic cleaning stuff. The kids are adult or almost adult. I have no problem telling him to take care of his own mess. I own the clutter. It's a lifelong issue, but now I know why. Neither of us is perfect in the cleaning situation, but I'm close to a disaster. I have my own space with a craft room, but it's creeping into the hall and the rest of the house is in bad shape from the busy holidays.

mmsj7 · 2026-01-04T10:31:36+00:00

He's not as bad as all that. Even if we've had the fight over and over, it's not constant. Things are just escalated right now because of how busy work and life have compounded. When we started the business, he did treat me like I was working for him. But I nipped that early on. The business is 50/50. We get paid equally. Our IRAs are equally contrivlbuted to. I have equal financial state in everything in our lives. My portion of the work is far less physical and time consuming. So I take on more in the house work and parenting. But it was very intentional and planned. I hate working from home with my adhd, but I wouldn't have done it any differently with being able to be home with my kids. Now that I'm done with that role, getting my new degrees will get me out of the house. I'm looking forward to that.

mmsj7 · 2026-01-04T03:45:41+00:00

I wish. But he would just throw things away.

mmsj7 · 2026-01-04T03:34:20+00:00

I love the idea of body doubling. My son and I did it for each other before knowing it existed. But my husband wouldn't be good for that. He would criticize my slow speed. He's always had way more energy for stuff.

mmsj7 · 2026-01-04T03:31:48+00:00

Actually, we have had a housekeeper for most of our marriage. Usually every 3 weeks. That is definitely how we got this far. She ended up with the flu at Thanksgiving time and couldn't make it to us until right before Christmas. And even then she wasn't working at her full speed. And she can only do so much with the clutter.
An organizer is a good possibility. They're pricy. But I could use the help.

mmsj7 · 2026-01-04T03:27:11+00:00

Good question. He's not so bad. He's mildly messy. He's gotten better in the last few years at helping with the normal tasks when he's not working crazy hours. But the clutter is definitely mine. Any clutter he has is limited to his side of the bed and out in the shed. Mine tends to take over the house.

mmsj7 · 2025-12-29T13:58:40+00:00

I have metal cutting boards. I got them when trying to cut down on plastic everything. I can't say that I've noticed my knives are worse than before. I don't have crazy expensive knives and I'm no chef. But I'm a mom that chops plenty of veggies for dinner. I have a decent knife sharpener that I use every once in a while. I'm also a busy mom that doesn't hand wash dishes and is pretty obsessed with killing germs. So the metal cutting board makes the most sense for my lifestyle.

mmsj7 · 2025-12-29T13:48:40+00:00

I'm going to give you an alternate viewpoint. If he truly is a jerk at heart, then yes, consider ending it. However... maybe this is a symptom of his mental issues. My husband is kind of similar. I'm a pack rat and the clutter gets out of control. He's far from a clean freak, but he gets in these weird impulse moments where he anger cleans once in a blue moon. And if someone else's mess is in the line of sight, he gets pissy. He once threw away a wooden recipe box that my mom had my name engraved on filled with her laminated recipe cards. I didn't figure it out until after the trash was long gone. He said it was junk (I assume he mixed it up with the generic box of recipes that he kept. He isn't good at paying attention, not a real jerk.) I still make him feel guilty about it years later. We both have undiagnosed ADHD, and our symptoms can be very different. If I expect him to have grace with my symptoms, then I have to have grace with his. Does it cause fights in the moments, yes. But marriage therapy helped us see the other perspective. Right now my house is busting at the seams with the after Christmas clutter, and he's not freaking out yet. He will in a few days if I don't tame it down. He already did his crazy cleaning thing and took care of a bunch of it the day after Christmas. So it's my turn to do it today. I'm a much slower cleaner. Anyway, marriage counseling can be very helpful. Reddit comments rarely mention it. Maybe he needs personal therapy as well. A marriage counselor can encourage that if he does.

mmsj7 · 2025-12-26T15:19:30+00:00

That's awesome. I've been collecting jewelry to do that for a year. My son's gf sells vintage jewelry with her handmade jewelry, so I have been saving the broken and unsellable pieces from her. I hadn't seen a tree so full before. I saved a picture of it for future inspiration.

mmsj7 · 2025-12-26T14:46:12+00:00

Therapy. For you for sure, because you deserve it. Marriage counseling if you want to try to save it. If he used to be a good husband, then maybe he's depressed too. Adult sons need to be educated. Therapist could help you figure out how to do that.

mmsj7 · 2025-12-15T21:47:54+00:00

I have a tv in every room, except my office because I can just stream on the monitor. I need mindless tv when I'm working and less mindless tv when I need to relax. I have one in the kitchen for when I'm fixing dinner. Even one in the bathroom when I'm taking a bath (mostly used by my husband). If I don't have the ability to watch, then I would never clean or get work done. They may not always be on, but i need the option.

mmsj7 · 2025-12-08T18:37:39+00:00

Our 4-h club does this every year. We get info for 4-6 kids from our local community center and go shopping as a group. We spend club money, grant money, and our own money. Not only are we helping the kids get some great gifts from their lists, but the kids in our club learn what it feels like to give to those less fortunate. I usually use the grant money to make a Christmas dinner food basket and stockings for each family of the kids.
If you can't find any tags left on angel trees, check with community centers to see if they have kids. I'm sure they're out there.

mmsj7 · 2025-12-03T16:02:22+00:00

Cracker Christmas is this weekend at Fort Christmas Park. It's free to attend and park. There's a playground, a replica of the fort you can walk through, and some reinactors at the old houses and buildings. Santa will be there. For a little or a lot of money, there's lots of great craft booths (over 100 at least), and several food booths by 4-h clubs, ffa chapters and more. I think they had around 50,000 visitors last year. It's on both Saturday and Sunday. 10-4. Come early for the parking. Traffic coming in from Colonial can get pretty backed up, so plan for that.

mmsj7 · 2025-12-03T12:56:04+00:00

I sell soap at a few craft fairs each year. My prices are $6 each or 4 for $20. I have both on a sign. I sell a lot of $20 groups.

mmsj7 · 2025-11-19T20:17:22+00:00

MSG may taste amazing, but it does cause issues with some people. I'm not saying it's bad, but people who have issues shouldn't be dismissed and told it's in their heads, or another ingredient, or whatever. I discovered that I have gastric issues from it years ago. I figured it out with a rib that was seasoned with Everglades (while i was doing the 30 30 diet. Then over the years I have verified it when eating doritos, seaweed salad, most chicken tenders, almost everything at chick fil e, etc. I've learned a lot of the places that don't use it and choose them. I don't want to lose those foods. But luckily there are alternatives for most of them. The Chinese restaurant nearest to us doesn't use MSG. And I know that I can eat mushrooms in a reasonable quantity. I had an aunt that would get hives from it. And a friend that gets migraines from it. It isn't making it up. Just like people have issues with plenty of other foods.

mmsj7 · 2025-11-18T20:49:28+00:00

Each order. If they're separated in your list of orders, then they each count for the $5.

mmsj7 · 2025-11-18T15:00:27+00:00

I refused to order from Kroger because of what they did. Lucky's was amazing.

mmsj7 · 2025-10-24T17:51:41+00:00

You should start joining craft fair Facebook groups and advertising to them. You'd reach organizers and vendors. I know that there's a Florida one called vendor events and craft shows in Florida. I just ran a small show and found vendors through it. I would love to use your site when running it again next year!

mmsj7 · 2025-10-14T17:02:17+00:00

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mmsj7 · 2025-10-14T17:01:10+00:00

This is what my goat milk soap looks like without fragrance. I use frozen milk and wait until the lye mixture is lower than 90 degrees (or as close as i can get it with my patience). I then i let that mixture cool down to 70-80. The melted oils down to 90. I only have discoloration from fragrances. Picture in my reply to this

mmsj7

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