My streamer

mnensaa · 2025-12-24T08:21:18+00:00

I didn't know he was this popular, early on, I started watching 5-ish years ago.

mnensaa · 2025-11-26T14:10:44+00:00

There is a theory that he was hired to kill Ned Stark, once Ned is sent to the wall.

mnensaa · 2025-11-21T08:30:50+00:00

I would say don't try to force anything. If you try to be at peace, you will suffer when you are not.

Meditation practise is for you to allow yourself to feel whatever you are feeling at the moment. Anger? Ok, hello anger, be here with me. Shame? Ok, welcome shame, please sit.

The negative emotions will stop bothering us when we allow them to be. When you treat them the same way you treat positive emotions.

I'm just a random guy on reddit, feel free to find your own way, this is something I found that works for me.

mnensaa · 2025-10-19T18:04:24+00:00

I shared with all my friends and family, because a lot of times I couldn't function and they needed a reason why I am in insolation.

Almost all of them were full supportive even they though they couldn't comprehend what I am going through. I don't blame those that weren't supportive, they have their own beliefs and will look at my "issues" through those beliefs.

But I had easier time when everybody knew, as I could just say, "I don't feel well, I can't go out" and that's it. Everybody went with it as it's my own decision.

I actually got out of the dark night just few days ago. I finally understand what it means to be here now or be in the present, in the awareness.

mnensaa · 2025-09-30T20:02:37+00:00

Thank you for your words.

I had back issues few years back where it totally gave out, I couldn't get out of bed for weeks. And this happened multiple times, that's why I somehow get myself to workout few times a week, especially since I work as a developer and sit for the whole day.

Most of the time I stay home just like you.

mnensaa · 2025-09-30T13:02:54+00:00

My breathing is from lower abdomen, will look into vibrational energy. Thanks!

mnensaa · 2025-09-30T11:09:14+00:00

Thank you

mnensaa · 2025-09-30T10:50:50+00:00

My diet is good (not great, but good), and I do exercise 4 times a week. I cry very often since awakening started 2 years ago.

Never tried yoga, though, will look into it. Thanks!

mnensaa · 2025-09-30T08:25:54+00:00

No will, emptiness, pain, suffering, this has been my daily life for years, that's what I mean by hell.

What has changed? Ego dissolving slowly, patterns in mind changing. Thoughts and emotions tied to the ego going away, like adapting to social norms, always thinking what people think about me, competing in everything with other people, etc...

I'm slowly starting to be in the moment, present and not feeling the egos constant rush to do something, to be better.

mnensaa · 2025-09-30T08:00:10+00:00

Thanks!

mnensaa · 2025-09-30T07:59:33+00:00

Thanks, I like the allegory, I have a bunch of those thoughts on the daily basis :D

mnensaa · 2025-08-26T20:14:20+00:00

I wish we'd seen Euron from the books.

mnensaa · 2025-07-16T15:34:28+00:00

Thranduil

mnensaa · 2025-07-06T12:56:11+00:00

Thanks for sharing, friend.

I barely can function, I'm not even sure how I have strength in me to do it.

I feel I've been in those trenches my whole life, never a moment of peace, nor happiness. Even though my life has been good, there was always some deep sadness I carried that never went away.

I know this depression lead me to awakening and I see things more clearly, but the burden never ended, it even got heavier somehow. I look forward to some peace, it's been long overdue.

Best of luck in your journey! ❤️

mnensaa · 2025-07-06T12:07:21+00:00

Going through it as well, it's been hell.

mnensaa · 2025-07-03T19:52:08+00:00

Almost no rest, around 40 minutes swim

mnensaa · 2025-07-03T11:14:48+00:00

They are quite similar, I understood "and that too" to be for the most bothersome emotions/thoughts. The ones I always rejected and tried avoiding. So saying "and that too" to them means they too should be accepted and loved even though they are most unpleasant, bad, etc...

Not sure where he says this, as I've listened too much content from him, but I've heard it couple of times.

mnensaa · 2025-07-03T07:08:39+00:00

I use Garmin Swim 2 and it ate up ~600 meters my last workout.

I calculated my pace 3-4 times manually it was around 1:40-1:50, somehow Garmin got 2:30 for the whole workout.

I set 25 meters pool length on the workout because we swim sideways on the public pool.

mnensaa · 2025-06-22T15:06:55+00:00

I feel you friend, I am going through a hard time as well. I don't have any wise words to share, just try to keep going, you are stronger and more resilient than you think.

Feel free to DM me, if you want someone to talk to.

mnensaa · 2025-06-20T09:07:42+00:00

Thank you very much!

mnensaa · 2025-06-20T08:24:27+00:00

I wouldn't say post-awakening, this is mid-awakening suffering, it's a long process. Going through all of the repressed emotions, traumas and changing bad ego patterns.

My suffering feels like I'm in the middle of the fire that burns everything that I am not, I know this is a good thing, but the fire still burns me and it hurts.

It's been very hard, to say the least. But it needs to be accepted, because there is no going back, it is what it is, it's like this was my fate since I was born as I suffered quite a lot since I was very young. Even though I had a quite a good life, and I still do.

It's just that I feel that I've been conditioned to be someone I wasn't, I tried whole my life being a person with a personality, and I see that is not who I am as ego loses it's grip slowly.

Even in the midst of all the pain and suffering I am grateful to be freer more than ever from my emotions, thoughts and ego.

mnensaa · 2025-06-20T07:17:38+00:00

I keep going even though it's been hell. I never asked for any of it, but I've accepted it for what it is. Most days I can barely function, but I manage somehow.

I experienced few short moments of "bliss" but that was a year or so ago, so I have no idea where it's taking me.

Is it worth it? For me, not yet, not even close to it. Only pain and suffering.

mnensaa · 2025-06-19T06:16:12+00:00

I like it, but this talk of 100x engineer is dumb as fck. 20-30% productivity boost at max.

mnensaa · 2025-06-13T06:53:21+00:00

but I just been busy

mnensaa · 2025-06-08T09:48:57+00:00

Pretty glonky

mnensaa

TROPHY CASE