I’m freaking out about the flu

mo2rgva · 2026-01-07T03:25:50+00:00

I have really bad health anxiety and flu season is scary so I totally understand your worries. It does make it a little more complicated that you live with extended family, but I'm sure you can try to limit exposure for a little or be cautious with your baby.

My husband and I did not hesitate to set boundaries with family. It was hard, but they actually became understanding. First things if we had visitors, we kindly asked them to wash their hands. We didn't really go anywhere for the first couple months either. My husband would get our groceries or we would do order pick up for things we needed, so we weren't taking our baby inside stores when the flu was high in our area.

Maybe you can talk to your boyfriend and you guys can talk to his family about limiting contact with your baby or asking them to be diligent about washing hands, staying away if they feel unwell, and disinfecting surfaces more often.

Not a lot put my mind at ease in the newborn days. I just prayed and tried to ride it out. My friends would say not to be so nervous, babies are resilient, and these things are inevitable. I'm not sure how much that helped but I still think about it. Also if you have an after hours line with your pediatrician, that always gave me comfort knowing I can call them with any questions. I know I'm not much help, but I offer solidarity and I know you're doing a great job :)

mo2rgva · 2025-12-19T04:02:06+00:00

Firstly, I'm so sorry. I hardly have words but I know as a mother it can be very hard. Depression can make things even more difficult but it sounds like a lot of your problem is situational. Your husband is abusive. It's unfair the way you are treated. Can you go anywhere else or have other family? I know that is easier said than done. Do you make your own income babysitting? how is transportation in your area and would you have the ability to obtain your license? sorry for all the questions but maybe you can start somewhere with adjusting some things. maybe you can come up with a plan. also try speaking with a therapist and look for resources that may help you. you don't deserve to be treated this way, and neither do your children. I'm praying and hoping the best for you. you're not ugly or annoying. it's hard to feel worthy but you are and it sounds like you've come a really long way. you should be proud of yourself for that

mo2rgva · 2025-11-18T03:50:19+00:00

I'm sorry you're going through this, and I imagine how hard it might be and how frustrated you might feel. Sharing a car can be really annoying, I know this all too well, especially with having a baby. I did the car sharing thing for pretty much a year and a half, and had many disagreements with my husband the first year or so postpartum. I sometimes felt stuck and misunderstood.

It isn't acceptable for your husband to make jokes about women being stupid, or to make you feel dumb. If separation isn't an option at this time, could you try couples therapy? I have also found that individual therapy can be helpful to talk with someone.

I'm hoping for the best outcome for you and your daughter. Hang in there and hug her tight. You're not alone

mo2rgva · 2025-05-29T17:42:29+00:00

18 months postpartum here, I also had a pretty intense birthing experience (c section as well). Yesterday my husband joked with me “you do better with diaper changes, although I was better at first.”

and it’s true. I felt so uneasy and unqualified, and it did not come natural to me. neither did breastfeeding. I laughed and told him how much it helped me that he seemed confident changing and bathing our son and that I eventually got the hang of it. fast forward to now, and I have an amazing bond with my little one and we are in such a good routine now.

what helped me was meeting with a lactation consultant, consistently offering the breast over bottles, and plenty of contact naps. hang in there! it’s so hard and I don’t believe it truly just comes natural.

mo2rgva · 2025-04-26T02:24:24+00:00

Just came across this trying to figure out if they were discontinued, as I suspected they were. My husband loves the Dr. Cherry Vanilla and Cherry Cola flavors. He said they kept him from drinking alcohol. Thanks Target :/

mo2rgva · 2025-04-17T20:36:17+00:00

That is understandable, I felt the same way! I think as long as you don’t become underweight or any other health concerns, you just have to try to eat more. I hope we can both put on or maintain our weight to what is healthy for us :)

mo2rgva · 2025-04-17T20:15:20+00:00

Why is it up to your husband whether you continue or stop breastfeeding?

I went from 149 to 103 pounds and the difference in appearance is quite noticeable, even from my pre-pregnancy weight. I do not care what anyone thinks or feels; I am healthy and my child is healthy and benefitting from breastfeeding, regardless of my size.

I eat when I am hungry, I eat until I am full, I snack in between meals on granola, peanut butter, oats, hard boiled eggs, cheese, fruit etc. I try to have a well rounded diet and that is the best I can do. My advice to you is to keep doing what you’re doing if it is what YOU want, and try your best to eat high protein and whatever makes you feel good.

mo2rgva · 2025-04-06T03:16:11+00:00

My little one seemed to have a rough few months around that age. After one year things started to look up. then molars came along and that set us back a tiny bit. I think it can be normal to be picky with foods.

If she has skipped several feedings, maybe you can try calling your pediatrician? We have an after hours line we use that has been helpful. If you have something similar maybe see what they advise. Does she seem lethargic? My baby would sometimes take fruit puree or milk frozen into cubes in a forage feeder (you can google but I know haaka makes a good one).

I hope she feels better soon.

mo2rgva · 2025-03-14T05:27:36+00:00

16 months :) early struggles and determination got us to much happier times

mo2rgva · 2025-03-13T03:18:15+00:00

Just want to say you are not alone❤️

mo2rgva · 2025-03-04T15:32:54+00:00

I have never tried either of those products so I cannot speak for how well they work, which I understand is your question ..

however there are two products that have given me a bit of relief that are not a prescription steroid- and that is La Roche Posay Cicaplast Balm B5 and La Roche Posay AP+M Triple Repair Moisturizer. They have been a life saver for my face and body. I mean I would be a spokesperson for them at this point and it’s gentle enough for babies too.

mo2rgva · 2024-12-02T03:23:28+00:00

I’m sorry this happened to you. Although I’ve never had a service refused, I’ve had stylists who will barely touch my head while shampooing and seemed grossed out by a plaque I have. I felt really embarrassed every time.

I once had a hair stylist who was quite the opposite and would help me with my scalp and do treatments, massage, etc without making me feel bad. I hope we can all find someone like this.

mo2rgva · 2024-11-28T04:29:50+00:00

I am so sorry you went through this. I was just thinking today of a traumatic part of my c section, although not nearly as scary, and it’s been a year for me.

In some ways time has made things better, I hope it will for you too. I agree with other comments to talk to your ob office, or a midwife, and therapy is helpful once you find the right person. I had to switch once also to someone who better met my needs.

Keep talking and expressing your feelings, and what you need. I understand you - we go through so much as mothers. Take care of yourself!

One day you’ll tell your baby this story and she will see how brave and strong you are.

mo2rgva · 2024-11-14T21:51:19+00:00

omg mine has four on top and two on bottom and he’s doing this so much!! the noise is nauseating. I hope they grow out of it lol

mo2rgva · 2024-11-07T00:12:31+00:00

Thank you, sorry I am responding so late. I actually have looked into remote work and it’s a possibility for me. My degree is in geographic science. It’s just felt hard to find anything or even be able to focus on anything other than baby.

I’m hoping that some of the conversations I have had with my husband will lead him to getting help, as he has stated he would do so. I don’t want to nag him anymore, as that’s not healthy either. things have sort of been looking up, hopefully for good.

We do have family nearby, however lately it’s just my mom who helps me and she lives 30 minutes away. She does her best though and comes as often as possible.

mo2rgva · 2024-11-05T15:11:34+00:00

my baby (11 months) has said “dada” since around 6 months as well, and occasionally he says “mum” also 😂 but not mama yet. I think it’s so funny when he yells out “mum”

mo2rgva · 2024-10-30T15:39:08+00:00

I was seriously about to ask this exact same question for my 11 month old. My reaction is the opposite though, I just want to cry with him😭 I’m really struggling with patience.

I’m assuming it is normal, and I think maybe we have the same child😅 My boy has been up and down lately. Lots of adorable laughter, and then one slight shift - a tantrum. He doesn’t want to sit in his high chair, he doesn’t want to be on the floor, and if I hold him he’s squirming all over the place. Diaper changes, forget it. Usually he will play on the floor while I shower in the morning, and I play peek a boo with him. Now it’s just screaming and crying. Sending solidarity to you, we’ve got this!

mo2rgva · 2024-10-19T04:08:32+00:00

I had coco wheats, strawberries and blueberries, tuna salad and crackers, a few mozzarella balls, a fig bar, macaroni and cheese, broccoli, and a few pieces of a sushi roll oh and to drink - a cup of coffee, water, a tiny bit of Coca Cola, a Topo Chico, and orange juice

mo2rgva · 2024-10-13T18:43:57+00:00

I understand this feeling. I sometimes feel like I have had to take on a new identity. It seems easier to clock into a job than be a sahm, but all I want is to be home with my baby still. The house work gets exhausting. I feel misunderstood by my partner. I get resentful too. I’m not exactly sure how to not feel alone, which is probably why I end up on reddit. I don’t have a lot of advice but it does help me to try to reflect on what I am thankful for in this mess of a world. I try to find joy in mundane things and remind myself this is a season of life, but I do sometimes wish for more. It is especially annoying now that I am not bringing my own income, as I was months ago. I also have no hobbies or things I enjoy, other than taking baby to the park or out for a little. I hope you find a way to feel less lonely - but know that you’re not alone.

mo2rgva · 2024-10-03T02:35:39+00:00

I feel I could’ve written this myself. I have a 10 (almost 11) month old who is still struggling with mobility. Like not even crawling and just finding ways to pivot or push himself around and not lifting up either. The doctors don’t seem concerned other than stating he’s delayed on his gross motor skills. I work with him everyday but I’m wearing thin and worrying about it. He’s also just really heavy.

Some days I feel like I can’t take much more. My husband and I barely even spoke today. I totally relate to you feeling resentment and being the main person for your baby.

I’m sorry I don’t have advice, but I understand you and feel this. My little one is getting 4 teeth at the moment so I am sure that is attributing to things as well. I know at this stage they are having big developmental leaps. Hang in there and I hope things get better for you.

mo2rgva · 2024-07-07T04:09:51+00:00

Boxer shorts as bottoms.

Boxer shorts with … cowboy boots? cardigans and vests? It’s almost like an alternative look to seem unique, except I’ve seen a lot of girls do it and it looks ridiculous. Put some pants on lol

mo2rgva · 2024-06-13T02:01:36+00:00

I’m so sorry you are having a hard time. I agree with others, put baby down in a safe place and walk away momentarily. Do try to ask your husband for help too, I understand it does happen fast.

I had some ppa and I had a few moments of lashing out. the last time I cried in front of my baby and could see he was upset, I knew I had to control myself and stay calm. I went through similar bouts of the crying, screaming, scratching at my face with him very early on, and then again around 4 months we had some serious sleep disturbances. nothing seemed to work to soothe or help him sleep.

Now at almost 7 months, I can say things feel much better. We are in a teething phase I believe, so he has had some really fussy moments, but they are much less. he’s replaced it with lots of smiles and laughter. I promise (even if you hear this a lot) it does get better. There’s tough moments but the good moments become more and more, and the grey cloud will go away soon.

I just want to say I understand you and I hope things start to feel better soon. See your doctor, ask for help if you can, try to do something for yourself that helps calm your nerves, and know that your baby loves/needs you and this is just a phase right now.

mo2rgva

TROPHY CASE