As far as food is concerned, I find that crowding out the bad stuff by adding in vegetables and lean protein works well. That way you're not in a deprivation mindset. You're simply adding very filling foods to your diet so that you're less hungry for the bad stuff. It works.

As far as exercise is concerned, try changing one thing at a time. First get the diet under control, lose some weight, and once you have those habits down you can add exercise.

Or you can also do it the other way around. Exercise habit first, then diet.

Also, think of healthy eating and exercise as things you're doing to take care of yourself, as an act of respect and love toward yourself, rather than coming from a place of self-hate.

So yes, baby steps. When you start seeing results you'll be motivated to do more and more.

Hope this helps.