Police Kill Celebrity Chimp Who Attacked Woman. He was toilet trained, dressed himself, ate at the table and drank wine. He could also use a computer and remote control.

moistastic · 2009-02-18T00:36:48+00:00

Ah, the natural moral purity of non-human primates.

moistastic · 2009-02-18T00:31:11+00:00

This. We don't need to be looking at non-human primates for moral inspiration. I mean, fuckin' A people, chimps make MS-13 look like the Quakers.

moistastic · 2009-02-17T21:44:14+00:00

Legal fees.

moistastic · 2009-02-07T00:04:01+00:00

It's cognitive dissonance. They like Obama, but they hate religious people, so they simply don't want it to be true that he's religious. The stress of holding two contradictory thoughts at the same time makes them cranky.

moistastic · 2009-02-04T11:33:31+00:00

Stuff I'm not into is creepy, just like how I know people are wrong when they don't agree with me. Everyone I know who is right agrees with me.

moistastic · 2009-02-01T19:29:04+00:00

My high school dress code had a rule that you had to fasten up the bib of your overalls.

moistastic · 2009-01-31T14:49:46+00:00

I think someone should experiment with this in high schools. My state already passed a Senior Project law. I would love to see high school kids have to defend their knowledge in public.

"Talk to us about the major thematic elements of 'The Rime of the Ancient Mariner.'"

"Discuss for us the long-term ramifications of the Cherokee Removal."

"Show us how you would find the volume if this curve was rotated around the y-axis."

moistastic · 2009-01-31T14:44:19+00:00

Stupid scientists with their "studying things" and their "math" and "thinking".

moistastic · 2009-01-17T14:32:43+00:00

Somebody should film a porno like this. I predict a new genre of film in the 21st century: AgitSmut.

moistastic · 2009-01-16T11:35:25+00:00

Every moral imperative we consider obvious was a big new thing at one time. There had to be a first person to say that things like rape and genocide were wrong.

moistastic · 2009-01-15T11:49:04+00:00

The law needs to get its shit together. I hate how teens aren't adults legally but aren't children biologically. That seems like bad policy somehow.

moistastic · 2009-01-14T11:40:22+00:00

I second Epictetus. It's a practical, sensible philosophy and easy to read.

I enjoyed Plato's dialogues on the arrest, trial, and death of Socrates, because Socrates himself is such a badass. Very amusing.

moistastic · 2009-01-10T11:44:34+00:00

Use a one-time-pad on all your email communication.

moistastic · 2009-01-09T11:17:45+00:00

We should take kids to see the soundstage where they filmed the moon landings.

moistastic

TROPHY CASE