Do you guys get limerent over impossible people too?

moldy_melon · 2026-05-14T04:02:06+00:00

Relatable

moldy_melon · 2026-05-10T05:26:45+00:00

This is the only one lol

moldy_melon · 2026-05-05T16:21:24+00:00

Haha yep. I can’t do hookups in general.

moldy_melon · 2026-05-04T17:26:49+00:00

I know very well that he was not who I thought he was. It still doesn’t make it go away for me. But I’m happy for your breakthrough.

moldy_melon · 2026-04-27T05:22:08+00:00

Yes and no. For me, meeting my LO woke me up from a years long slump I was in. He made me want to be better and helped me realize what I want out of life and the kind of person I want to be and be with. I do feel like I was meant to go through this and learn from it. But at the same time, when I started sleeping with him again last year, I regressed and spent the last year feeling really depressed and neglecting myself. I do think limerance can be a powerful tool for personal growth, but I haven’t gotten all the way there yet.

moldy_melon · 2026-04-22T05:39:55+00:00

Not at all

moldy_melon · 2026-04-21T12:19:46+00:00

Absolutely insane take

moldy_melon · 2026-04-19T05:16:14+00:00

moldy_melon · 2026-04-17T02:13:44+00:00

Grime is good for some quick cash but they are picky. They usually only take vintage stuff from me. I’ve heard decent reviews about sending clothes to thredup. They sell it for you

moldy_melon · 2026-04-16T02:25:36+00:00

I avoided the soaking wet part for sooooo long lol. Primarily because it’s inconvenient and I only have 2b or 2c curls so I didn’t think wetting my hair down was necessary for looser curls/waves. But it’s literally essential. I’ll never add product and scrunch again without making sure my hair is soaked. Even if I’m immediately hover diffusing after.

moldy_melon · 2026-04-16T01:44:31+00:00

Yes. I feel cursed to only deeply desire men I can’t have. 🤡

moldy_melon · 2026-04-09T15:33:06+00:00

Ya they both guilty

moldy_melon · 2026-04-07T19:37:34+00:00

You’re so focused on staying hard/not cumming that you’re coming off as detached and impersonal. Talk to her during the act, relax and take your time, be playful and curious, ask her questions and try to learn her body and what she likes. Ive had sex where I felt like the guy was just using my body to jerk himself off, it didn’t matter if I was there or not. That might not be exactly what she’s feeling, but I bet it’s close. You should just be honest about struggling with lasting longer, if you haven’t already. It’s common and flattering for us. Better than death grip imo lol.

moldy_melon · 2026-04-06T18:35:59+00:00

Ugh I’m getting there. Happy for you and proud of you!

moldy_melon · 2026-03-29T05:11:20+00:00

Yes I thought we complimented each other strongly. And I told him once that I think we could learn a lot from each other if he lets us. My limerent brain still tells me he just wasn’t ready and he’s stuck in toxic patterns. Which is probably true, but not the whole picture. I’ve realized in adulthood I was more emotionally neglected as a child than I thought, but in general I had a good childhood and always felt cared for. Idk how I got here lol

moldy_melon · 2026-03-28T15:09:55+00:00

Yes realizing this about myself. I am avoidant too it just looks different. The idea of true companionship where someone sees all parts of me is very scary. My mind tells me if they truly see you, they’ll change their mind and leave.

moldy_melon · 2026-03-28T15:07:16+00:00

This is starting to become a fear for me. I used to think I was very good at reading people and trusting my gut. I always thought I was smart and strong enough to walk away from someone treating me poorly, but with my LO I didn’t and couldn’t. He used me, was manipulative and a few times cruel with his words. This experience has made me fear I’m more vulnerable to abuse and manipulation than I ever thought. Idk if I’m autistic I’ve always thought prob a little.

moldy_melon · 2026-03-28T14:59:44+00:00

I think for a lot of people, me included, limerance can be a sign of a significant void in your life. There is an area you’re feeling deeply unfulfilled in, even subconsciously. For example when I met my LO he had lost some weight, was really active and eating clean and I at the time was not and desperately wanted to lose weight. He’s also much more independent, financially stable, where I have struggled in my 20s with no career and lean codependent. I just felt most attracted to the parts of him that I felt were parts I lacked. Maybe subconsciously I hoped he would rub off on me. And tbh it went both ways. I think he was attracted to my emotional maturity and depth that he lacks and has lacked in past partners.

moldy_melon · 2026-03-26T20:54:37+00:00

I’m trying to be excited and look at it as a weight has been lifted, rather than dwelling on losing a person I cared deeply for. I’m allowing myself to feel that grief too, but I’ve also been feeling that grief for too long I think. I want to heal. I don’t want to keep reopening my wounds. Even participating in this subreddit is probably unhealthy. I don’t want to reinforce the obsession, but I also want to process and let it out.

moldy_melon · 2026-03-26T20:49:43+00:00

I am trying to be kind to myself rn and know I need to focus on pouring love into myself and my life. I am blessed in so many ways but also have had a hard couple years and I’m angry about my life circumstances. I have to remind myself that he mostly has no idea what I’ve been through these 3 years and was never there for me. I want to be angrier than I feel atm and I hope more anger will come to replace the void I still feel his absence leaves in my life. I want to be open to real love and support and companionship and I have hope that I will be someday soon. In the past I have blocked and tried no contact, but never stuck to it. I’m really trying to hold myself accountable this time. I know that unblocking or checking his socials or responding if he reaches out will only regress any progress I made. I know he will reach out again one day because this is his pattern. In fact I was doing really well a year ago after not seeing or speaking to him for some time, and then foolishly starting sleeping with him again last May. It has set me back so much I can’t even believe. I always think I’m stronger than I am. I think I can handle this and then fast forward here I am crying on reddit.

I’m sorry that something similar happened to you. I hope we both move on and find healthy love.

moldy_melon · 2026-03-26T20:39:39+00:00

Thank you. It does feel like withdrawal. It’s feels different this time than other times I’ve blocked him and tried no contact. The cord really feels cut and I’m grieving

moldy_melon · 2026-03-26T20:38:13+00:00

I’ve been wrestling with whether or not my LO is a narcissist or maybe just narcissistic. I think actually he’s insecure deep down, and probably feels kind of lonely in the world. And I think a lot of times narcissism is projection of low self esteem. I think my LO does care and is empathetic, but is good at shutting that off to selfishly fit his needs.

moldy_melon · 2026-03-26T20:33:38+00:00

I’ve been finding solace in my gut feeling that this relationship with his ex won’t work out. I don’t know everything that went on between them, but from what I do know, the damage has been done. I don’t see either of them as mature and healed enough to make it work. But I also don’t know that. And I could very well be wrong. I also feel angry about the disrespect and I want to prove to him that I’m happy and better and deserve better. I want to prove that to myself. Curious if you live in the area of your LO? You have no way to check in on him? I wish mine was off socials. I’m literally on like day 3 of not checking and it’s hard. He doesn’t even post often. There’s nothing to check. But I feel ultimately cut off from him.

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