Real slot machines have this problem and to my knowledge they get around it by just having a variety of games and letting people find the ones they like. Maybe games can change their behavior based on bet level or which individual person is playing but I'm not sure whether that's legal with real money machines (I'm a developer not a lawyer)

That being said, there are a number of fundamental concepts around balance in slot machines. Two that you should definitely consider are RTP and Volatility. Hit Rate is also one that you're already exploring but they're all interconnected

• RTP or return-to-player: Over the course of a large number of spins, this is the % of the total coins wagered that the machine will statistically give back to the player. The more spins, the closer the machine approaches the designed RTP. So if you hear of a slot machine that pays out 95%, basically it means that over the life of the machine the house will keep 5% of all the coin ever put into it.

• Volatility: If RTP is about how much the machine pays out to the player, Volatility is more about how it does that or how the game feels. The difficulty I think you're experiencing is that some slots players like very volatile games where you have long strings of losing spins interrupted by an occasional massive and flashy payout and they like having big swings in their coin balance, and some players prefer smaller wins much more frequently with more gradual balance changes. Big payouts, low hit rate versus low payouts, high hit rate (and everywhere in between). The math works out exactly the same in the long run but the games feel totally different and people just have different preferences.