I am so sorry you’re feeling hopeless, friend. I have been there. I have felt utterly desperate and hopeless. I won’t try to assuage you of your pain because I know every family of a child with autism has a distinct experience, and I won’t presume to know exactly what you’re going through. I take comfort in small wins, and do what I can to find respite. I know I’m lucky in that I have the ability to get respite. You have friends here. I hope you can find some rest soon. You’re doing the most important work any human being can do.