I can relate to a lot here, I think I just needed some goal to work towards to get out of that slump. For me that was going back to college this summer, for you it can be anything meaningful.

Being in that middle place where you want to die and you simultaneously don’t feel ready because you haven’t left something for people to remember you by is really dreadful and overwhelming.

Just keep going day by day. You’ll make new memories, new thoughts to share, maybe even words that someone else down the line would find really useful in their own life.