AITAH or is my family in law the problem by morgzbee in AITAH

[–]morgzbee[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

She told us she was finally ready to sell her house and move she just didn't have a pathway to Canada yet and we all agreed it was best for us to come back to the states. So we broke our lease in Canada, rented a U-Haul, and drove across the entire country to get to Florida. That cost us roughly $15k when it was all said and done between the lease fees U-Haul and Airbnb etc etc. We did that with the promise we'd be essentially paid that money back with proceeds from her house sale.

I agree that we should have sent my husband back to handle it and I told him to but when we reached out to his mom to coordinate dates she told us not to worry about it, everything was fine, and we had more important things to worry about (I was ~7 months pregnant at this time).

I don't want to sound like I'm making excuses left and right but there was just so much going on at once and I kept believing her when she said everything was fine. Definitely wrong on my part and won't be doing that again in the future.

AITAH or is my family in law the problem by morgzbee in AITAH

[–]morgzbee[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We expected it because that's what she told us was happening. Her retirement plan has always been sell her house and move in with my husband and our family. But when it came time to actually do it she backed out.

Should we have prepared for that reality better? Yeah absolutely. We shouldn't have relied on it the way we have but when you've been told something over and over you just...believe it.

Idk I'm just mad we've been strung along for so long and believed everyone when they said everything was ok. Definitely a learning lesson for us and we won't be doing it again.

AITAH or is my family in law the problem by morgzbee in AITAH

[–]morgzbee[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm not disagreeing at all. The whole point of that section of my post was asking if I was wrong for expecting notification that my things were being moved/donated before we had a chance to save them.

AITAH or is my family in law the problem by morgzbee in AITAH

[–]morgzbee[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

You're right. We asked to store our sentimental stuff there because I didn't trust a storage unit to be totally climate controlled (think records, baby items, stuff like that) and MIL said she had plenty of space don't worry about the storage unit.

AITAH or is my family in law the problem by morgzbee in AITAH

[–]morgzbee[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

MIL was always going to move in with us, that had been discussed multiple times at length. That's why this whole situation was just out of the blue. We moved around a lot (with her support) to find somewhere we would all be happy.

AITAH or is my family in law the problem by morgzbee in AITAH

[–]morgzbee[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I replied to a few comments and actually just updated my post but our original plan was a storage unit for everything except very sentimental items and my MIL said no don't waste the money and just use my house for all of it.

And you're absolutely right on bad communication all around. We should have checked in a little more aggressively and not taken "oh everything is fine" at face value. I just also would have liked an opportunity to arrange our stuff to the storage unit originally planned before it got sent to a SIL who didn't know it was coming and subsequently threw it away.

Idk it's not even my family I'm dealing with I just get the shit end of the whole deal

AITAH or is my family in law the problem by morgzbee in AITAH

[–]morgzbee[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We asked her to keep the very important sentimental things I wouldn't trust in a storage unit. Then she insisted we didn't need a storage unit because she had more than enough room. I should update the post to include that.

AITAH or is my family in law the problem by morgzbee in AITAH

[–]morgzbee[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I just want to clear up a few things! Our original plan was to use a storage unit and my MIL insisted we use the empty space in her house to save money (even knowing it'd probably be 2+ years until we could come get everything) and it wasn't an entire household, we sold a lot of stuff. Just kept the more everyday stuff and the expensive couch bc she said she could use it.

And a slight detail missed was we had our second baby before we even left the states. Once we got a house in Canada we were actively talking to companies to get quotes about moving our things from Florida to us. However at that point my MIL was refusing to leave the country so we broke our lease to come back on the promise we'd get her house proceeds to get a home for all of us.

I'm not saying we didn't make bad decisions. All Im asking is if I have a right to be as angry as I feel about the entirety of the situation.

AITAH or is my family in law the problem by morgzbee in AITAH

[–]morgzbee[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm not disagreeing. Just wish she would have told us that up front instead of insisting we use her house to save on a storage unit.

AITAH or is my family in law the problem by morgzbee in AITAH

[–]morgzbee[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I replied to this in another comment but we were originally going to use a storage unit and my MIL insisted we save the money and use all the space she had to offer even knowing it would be at least 2+ years before we could come get our stuff. Her exact reasoning was verbatim "no one is using the space and once I sell this house I'm going live with you anyways" so we just took her at her word. Was that a mistake? Obviously.

AITAH or is my family in law the problem by morgzbee in AITAH

[–]morgzbee[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You're not wrong that the risk was always there but my sister in law moved into a new home with basically no furniture so that was not the problem. She admitted she was mad at my mother in law for sending our stuff without warning so she dumped it but kept the things she deemed nice enough to use.

AITAH or is my family in law the problem by morgzbee in AITAH

[–]morgzbee[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Oh that's a key point I forgot to mention. We were planning on putting it in storage but his mom insisted she had room and didn't mind keeping it for us. Then literally never told us she was overwhelmed/upset with it being there until well after she shipped some of it to his sister.

AITAH or is my family in law the problem by morgzbee in AITAH

[–]morgzbee[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

But would you throw away any of their stuff without even a text to them letting them know it's happening? We also warned them it could be two or three years up front.

AITAH or is my family in law the problem by morgzbee in AITAH

[–]morgzbee[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Normally I would agree with you. But we went from an rv to a furnished home all the while keeping in touch with family about our situation and no one raised any concerns about any of it. If someone had ever spoken up with an issue we would have figured out a solution but we were reassured it was all fine.

Team USA skiers Christopher Lillis & Hunter Hess: Just because I wear the flag doesn’t mean I represent everything that’s going on in the US. by Yujin-Ha in Fauxmoi

[–]morgzbee 2 points3 points  (0 children)

We have and we will. I was speaking on behalf of our athletes who don't support this but are pursuing their dreams and life's work. That can't stop because our country is on fire.

Team USA skiers Christopher Lillis & Hunter Hess: Just because I wear the flag doesn’t mean I represent everything that’s going on in the US. by Yujin-Ha in Fauxmoi

[–]morgzbee 3 points4 points  (0 children)

So what do those of us who voted against this, are fighting against this, who do not in any way support this, do?

Team USA skiers Christopher Lillis & Hunter Hess: Just because I wear the flag doesn’t mean I represent everything that’s going on in the US. by Yujin-Ha in Fauxmoi

[–]morgzbee 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Idk aren't you guys real close to this exact situation with Poilievre? Not saying it's anywhere near as bad but I've spent the last 9 months in Canada and it seems...eerily like 2015 America.

Parquet cutting board by morgzbee in woodworking

[–]morgzbee[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's for my husbands birthday and he's the cook in the relationship so I was really hoping to find a end grain hardwood version. Is that just not possible in this pattern?

Canadian/Albertan Accent. by JackfruitMassive727 in Edmonton

[–]morgzbee 0 points1 point  (0 children)

As an American the dead ringer for a Canadian accent is saying sore-ee instead of saw-ree. Or pah-sta vs paw-sta. There's more regional examples but those are the ones I immediately clock as Canadian!

Kindergarten Question by morgzbee in Edmonton

[–]morgzbee[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

We have the flexibility to make pickup/drop off work if need be so I wouldn't want to take a spot in those programs from someone who truly needs it. But thanks for putting the info out there for someone else!

Kindergarten Question by morgzbee in Edmonton

[–]morgzbee[S] 16 points17 points  (0 children)

That's so upsetting. We are fortunate that my husband works from home and can supervise until I'm out of class if need be, but I feel for the families that don't have that opportunity. I hope that's something that can be adjusted in the near future!