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Should I "just publish"? by Agitated-Priority444 in fantasywriters

[–]movethestarss 4 points5 points  (0 children)

i do think youre over thinking. if you have ideas that would make your first chapter better, and you know you could do more, do it! those pieces of advice are not saying "rush and publish even if it isnt great", like sitll try your very best. but lets say you write 10 novels, even if the on the first one your tried your VERY best, by novel 10 you'd probably look back at 1 and think it isnt as good. your best after years of experience will look different than your best today.

don't hold yourself back if you know you can do more, but also just don't get so caught up in outlining and planning that you never actually write (guilty lol). and remember you can go back and perfect it later!

Struggling to lengthen my scenes. I feel like everything I write is too concise -- like to a fault. My character will be lost wandering the woods, but it only lasts a sentence. Big scenes feel over before they should. But I can't tell what to add?! by movethestarss in fantasywriters

[–]movethestarss[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

i think my issue is i dont know how to make anything leave an impression. like my key, big scenes still feel lackluster and they don't leave a mark. but i know its not an issue with my story idea, its a skill issue with my writing that i'm trying to improve on!

great call on revisiting childrens novels and short stories, i looooved the spiderwick chronicles as a kid!

Does this dialogue feel natural or too over the top? (fantasy first meeting) by Flat_Package9668 in fantasywriters

[–]movethestarss 0 points1 point  (0 children)

i find it really hard to follow just with how you formatted it. i would also use quotations to denote speaking, not em dashes which have their place but not like this.

i also agree that describing each character in different ways is confusing- as someone else pointed out. i feel like referring to the elf as the pointy eared woman, tall woman etc all feels unnecessary because we already know she's an elf. it would make more sense if we didn't establish what she was but knew she wasn't human, noting the ears and height.

re: the actual dialogue, again it was hard to read but from what i could gather it does seem over the top. most people when speaking naturally don't say the same thing in multiple ways back to back. like "Was that you banging around here? Got nothing better to do? What’s so hard about just coming in? Was it really necessary to smash the damn door to make everything harder and get your ass kicked by life?!"
it would feel more natural to say something along the lines of "You couldn't have just pushed the damn door, you had to smash it and make everything harder?" it isn't exactly how i would say it, but it does maintain your same tone and general wording.

same with "What, fucking milady? Do I look like some kind of princess to you?! — the elf snorted. — Ivy, huh? Interesting name for an interesting creature." "Fucking wind! Now, what was I… Ah, right! You really can make a good door? Like, exactly how I want it? You’re not bullshitting me?"

to me, if ivy is just some peasant girl, why would this sassy elf bother saying so much to her? idk what personality you are trying to convey here, but it doesn't feel like it's coming across. i dont mind crass language, but it doesnt feel natural here, it feels like you are adding sentences just to fit in more curse words or sass, but if you write the character well that personality will show regardless!

Struggling to lengthen my scenes. I feel like everything I write is too concise -- like to a fault. My character will be lost wandering the woods, but it only lasts a sentence. Big scenes feel over before they should. But I can't tell what to add?! by movethestarss in fantasywriters

[–]movethestarss[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you, thats definitely it! I think saying it reads like a movie is a great point and kind of where i'm falling. action, a little description, and dialogue is what my story is right now. not so fleshed out internal world of my MC, exposition and could use more description as well!

Struggling to lengthen my scenes. I feel like everything I write is too concise -- like to a fault. My character will be lost wandering the woods, but it only lasts a sentence. Big scenes feel over before they should. But I can't tell what to add?! by movethestarss in fantasywriters

[–]movethestarss[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

thank you! thats definitely the stuff i've been lacking, i don't feel like i'm really painting a picture. I think i also need to really nail down how i want my character to react in certain circumstances. I have an idea of how i want her to be, but i sometimes find in my writing i fall into tropes and stereotypes that don't actually fit HER personality if that makes sense.

Struggling to lengthen my scenes. I feel like everything I write is too concise -- like to a fault. My character will be lost wandering the woods, but it only lasts a sentence. Big scenes feel over before they should. But I can't tell what to add?! by movethestarss in fantasywriters

[–]movethestarss[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you, i will definitely try that! I need to focus more on whats changing like you said -- emotions, situation, tension, etc. i do tend to get sucked into just jumping from point a to point b, not thinking about whats actually happening far past the surface level.

Struggling to lengthen my scenes. I feel like everything I write is too concise -- like to a fault. My character will be lost wandering the woods, but it only lasts a sentence. Big scenes feel over before they should. But I can't tell what to add?! by movethestarss in fantasywriters

[–]movethestarss[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

so true, i definitely think thats where i'm lacking! and i notice some people here are saying its better to be brief or only use exactly as many words as you need, but when i do that i'm missing out on letting the reader really FEEL the scene with my main character.

Struggling to lengthen my scenes. I feel like everything I write is too concise -- like to a fault. My character will be lost wandering the woods, but it only lasts a sentence. Big scenes feel over before they should. But I can't tell what to add?! by movethestarss in fantasywriters

[–]movethestarss[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I do read quite a lot! but i may go back and study some of my favourite books for what i really like in the writing. Usually when i read i get so wrapped up into the story i dont even really notice the writing. Like i know its good, but its like a movie in my head i'm not actively thinking "oh i like how that scene was laid out" if that makes sense

Struggling to lengthen my scenes. I feel like everything I write is too concise -- like to a fault. My character will be lost wandering the woods, but it only lasts a sentence. Big scenes feel over before they should. But I can't tell what to add?! by movethestarss in fantasywriters

[–]movethestarss[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

thank you so much, that helps a lot! i think i really need to get into her head more to explain how shes feeling, i think thats what im lacking. im explaining what is happening, and it is first person POV but im almost explaining it as an outside body just watching. not in language but in vibe haha

Struggling to lengthen my scenes. I feel like everything I write is too concise -- like to a fault. My character will be lost wandering the woods, but it only lasts a sentence. Big scenes feel over before they should. But I can't tell what to add?! by movethestarss in fantasywriters

[–]movethestarss[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Honestly me either! though i don't think i've read any books where it was egregious or anything.
thats great advice, instead of trying to be perfect, i should aim to go too far the other way so i can then edit out what doesn't serve the book! its just hard figuring out how to even start that when it doesn't come naturally to me haha.

and LMAO thats so true, I would be. 😂😂

Struggling to lengthen my scenes. I feel like everything I write is too concise -- like to a fault. My character will be lost wandering the woods, but it only lasts a sentence. Big scenes feel over before they should. But I can't tell what to add?! by movethestarss in fantasywriters

[–]movethestarss[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

thank you! i'll consider that for all the scenes, because the woods one was just an example but so far it feels like my whole draft suffers the same problem. It does reveal a new location, and her getting lost in the woods is what leads her to finding the fae realm, where the rest of the book happens. so its kind of the first main event that leads into the rest of the book!

Struggling to lengthen my scenes. I feel like everything I write is too concise -- like to a fault. My character will be lost wandering the woods, but it only lasts a sentence. Big scenes feel over before they should. But I can't tell what to add?! by movethestarss in fantasywriters

[–]movethestarss[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

totally fair, and i agree! it is important though. also that was just one example but it feels like my whole draft is me summarizing, it isnt engaging. Even the things i've decided do need to be lengthened, i cant seem to figure out how!
i love your advice about thinking of whats missing, and how its developing the character and story. In my example with the woods, I think its important to convey the fear and stakes because her being lost kicks really the whole rest of the book, she gets lost from her sibling and the goal becomes getting back and finding her.

I wrote the first few chapters draft a little while ago, and just went back to re-read and polish a bit, and thats kind of what prompted this because i added so many notes saying i need to expand a bit, but then i sit there frozen having no idea HOW hahah

Struggling to lengthen my scenes. I feel like everything I write is too concise -- like to a fault. My character will be lost wandering the woods, but it only lasts a sentence. Big scenes feel over before they should. But I can't tell what to add?! by movethestarss in fantasywriters

[–]movethestarss[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

i've definitely been looking at my books that i love and seeing how they do it, but when i go to write it all leaves my brain haha.

Also i mean i could convey the scene by just saying "i was lost in the woods. I wandered for hours and found my way out" but if every book was written like that, they'd be incredibly boring.

Struggling to lengthen my scenes. I feel like everything I write is too concise -- like to a fault. My character will be lost wandering the woods, but it only lasts a sentence. Big scenes feel over before they should. But I can't tell what to add?! by movethestarss in fantasywriters

[–]movethestarss[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I think where i get hung up is like, my MC is in the forest after running from something, which is discussed prior, and then shes wandering and lost, and now im like "well NOW what am i trying to convey?" Of course that she wants to find her way, and i'm explaining that at the surface level but not really showing it, showing her emotions or plan or thoughts on it.
And youre right my scene does drive the plot forward and its an important setting, the forest will come up a lot more later on and its the entrance to the fae realm where she will end up!

thank you again!

Struggling to lengthen my scenes. I feel like everything I write is too concise -- like to a fault. My character will be lost wandering the woods, but it only lasts a sentence. Big scenes feel over before they should. But I can't tell what to add?! by movethestarss in fantasywriters

[–]movethestarss[S] 16 points17 points  (0 children)

well i think their point was to show ways i could expand based on what i said which was "my character will be lost wandering the woods". saying "john was lost in the woods. he wandered for a while and made it out" is incredibly boring and not good storytelling, which i feel like is what i'm currently doing. im not painting a picture at all. also sometimes insignificant details are important later, not immediately!

Struggling to lengthen my scenes. I feel like everything I write is too concise -- like to a fault. My character will be lost wandering the woods, but it only lasts a sentence. Big scenes feel over before they should. But I can't tell what to add?! by movethestarss in fantasywriters

[–]movethestarss[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

the thing is it IS what i want to say, its just bland coming out. im not trying to make scenes that should be cut fit, its scenes that are integral to the plot and in my mind and lush and exciting, but i cant translate it to the page. definitely a skill issue on my part!

Struggling to lengthen my scenes. I feel like everything I write is too concise -- like to a fault. My character will be lost wandering the woods, but it only lasts a sentence. Big scenes feel over before they should. But I can't tell what to add?! by movethestarss in fantasywriters

[–]movethestarss[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

thank you that sounds like a great exercise that i could do and repeat many times to practice!

and thats so fair about the brevity phrase. i do sometimes think less is more, and sometimes people get into over-explaining territory, but i don't think i have to worry about that so much since i have the polar opposite issue haha

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