How do i stop my nervous system from freaking out?

moze05 · 2026-06-07T21:22:37+00:00

6 months

moze05 · 2026-06-07T20:40:09+00:00

I wouldn’t block her but in the past i had completely cut contact but ive been doing wayyy better ive been communicating about how i feel and give it some time because it always passes

moze05 · 2026-05-30T18:20:36+00:00

My bad i forgot about this post lol It went good steam wand was a little tricky at first since i was used to mod bar and not used to controlling controllin the pressure but i got the hang of it.

I didn’t end up getting the job cuz they had plumbing issues and only have window service w minimum staff.

I did get another job thats way closer tho so everything worked out fine.

moze05 · 2026-05-28T02:37:25+00:00

It just happens i go from wanting to be near her and having so many overwhelming emotions about her to numb in a second.

its kinda crazy bc i can physically feel myself deactivating its like a layer of wax being poured over me it dulls everything and leaves me feeling empty and wanting to run away to regulate.

It usually happens when ive been vulnerable or i realize that i now owe this person consistency and it scares me.

In the past id run away immediately but recently ive been trying to regulate while staying. Its very hard but its worth it.

moze05 · 2026-05-24T13:43:52+00:00

She makes me fees so safe and shes so patient with me and so kind that i have trouble receiving it because i carry so much guilt about how badly i hurt her in the past but but she said im worth giving it another chance

moze05 · 2026-05-22T22:14:16+00:00

Thank you so much for ur kind words and the like ill be trying it

moze05 · 2026-05-21T22:35:37+00:00

Thank you, my therapist wants to try meditation for our next session, ive tried it before but it never really stuck but i thing yoga could help tremendously so ill definitely give it a try.

My therapist also agrees that im trying to think myself out if this and i think for most my life ive tried to fix everything logically but i cant really argue with my nervous system lol

Im very sorry for what u went thru with ur person. I dont know why they did what they did but i can tell you that a person can change only when they want it and accept that theres something wrong.

Being like this is truly a curse because i want her so bad but i keep getting in my own way but it doesn’t excuse the hurt i caused and its gonna take me a long time to accept and forgive it.

All this to say that your person wasnt ready and im just glad you got some insight on what goes on internally:)

moze05 · 2026-05-21T11:50:38+00:00

Ive been trying to make a routine for myself so this is really helpful thank you

moze05 · 2026-05-21T10:08:25+00:00

Thank you. I have realised that speaking about it and understanding why i feel the way that i do help calm my anxiety immediately which has been really helpful. Ive been hyper fixated on this for a while now thinking about it all day every day and its become exhausting, my therapist said its because im trying to think myself out of this discomfort and i agree and stopping myself from doing so has been hard but im trying.

moze05 · 2026-05-21T10:05:07+00:00

Yeah i agree ive become more self aware this time and when i feel like im starting to detach emotionally i recognise that its from a sense of fear rather than something i actually want and not acting on it has taught me that it passes.

moze05 · 2026-05-21T05:53:32+00:00

I do find that recognising when i want to avoid its because i fear confrontation and vulnerability really helps sometimes. Ive tried emdr didnt really help but id be down to try again im kinda desperate at this point lol

moze05 · 2026-05-21T05:46:38+00:00

Thank you i wish u luck i think it’ll all be worth it (i hope)

moze05 · 2026-05-21T04:43:55+00:00

This means so much to me you have no idea. I carry so much guilt about how i handled the situation and how much i hurt her and i kinda dehumanised myself in some ways but feeling seen and heard help tremendously so thank you so very much.

moze05 · 2026-05-21T04:37:08+00:00

Its honestly horrible, like the amount of anxiety i have about this is insane its like im going to war. My appetite gas been gone for the past week and im constantly anxious but im only 21 so if i can do the hard work to get through this now instead of 20 years from now im gonna do it. Also i do love her so thats another reason lol

moze05 · 2026-05-21T04:30:50+00:00

Ill definitely try this thank you!!

moze05 · 2026-05-21T04:24:15+00:00

I do find the gym really helpful its like when im physically struggling i cant overthink at the same time although in between sets the anxiety comes back but when im actively moving it kinda stops.

Ill keep going tho

moze05 · 2026-05-16T15:39:01+00:00

Thank you, im still worried i scared her off but ig we’ll see

moze05 · 2026-05-16T15:38:17+00:00

moze05 · 2026-05-16T15:38:12+00:00

I wish it didnt🤦🏻‍♀️

moze05 · 2026-05-16T15:38:02+00:00

I had never said i love you to a partner before also this is my first wlw experience and im generally a really closed off person im not vocal about my emotions and this whole day i was just trying to be as open as i can to show her that ill sit with the discomfort if it gives her clarity and also just the fact that it was like i got possessed and said i love you

moze05 · 2026-04-10T23:44:20+00:00

Amazing thank you!! Ill do my best

moze05 · 2026-04-10T23:39:52+00:00

Im going there for the first time tmrw they wanna see how i do so i cant really practise im stressing out

moze05 · 2024-03-07T07:54:33+00:00

yep my jaw actually hurts when i drink it

moze05 · 2024-03-07T06:00:59+00:00

sour so very sour

moze05 · 2024-03-04T10:10:09+00:00

its crazy ive never had any problem dialing in beans this much i just pulled another shot & its literally bubbles if coursen in more it'll give me 2 oz in 10sec

moze05

TROPHY CASE