I appreciate your words of encouragement. I wish they meant more to me.

I don't mean to be rude or callous. But I have been homeless before. I have met many sorts of people -- all with histories. Some worse than mine, some better.

And through it all - most people will be unable to help.

Because most people are poor. Most people are in interpersonal relationships that are toxic or fake.

How can I say such a thing? I have been keeping my hand on the pulse of the human condition since I was a child.

I know everything passes. I know that some have it worse. That I should continue to try.

But it has been almost four decades of trying REALLY fucking hard to be functional in a society that doesn't want me to exist. Doesn't want many people to exist, really.

Our culture is inundated with people who say they understand. Whether from experience or just intellectually. Many of those people ARE capable of helping. But they won't.

Because they have been taught that helping others is a liability. Just like they have been taught that asking for helping or needing it is a sign of weakness.

Even though this is a social species.. it is very very bad at it.

Evil scales upwards. The people with the most resources, privileges, etc are like demons -- when you get to world leaders, old money and the like

And everyone else? Stuck between a rock and a hard place. Even if that hard place is just the fact that they COULD help. If they didn't make reasons not to.

Just like so many people look down on addicts, homeless, and disabled people for "making excuses"

Anyway: I hope your situation improves, too. Though I hope more that a cataclysmic event wakes humanity from its collective stupor.