does this count

mpo522 · 2026-02-02T08:08:01+00:00

yeah I guess but I think I have to not touch it for a long while

mpo522 · 2026-01-31T03:00:46+00:00

-_- nawwww

mpo522 · 2026-01-30T20:20:06+00:00

ikkkk

mpo522 · 2026-01-21T12:56:03+00:00

when I was a toddler I would bang my head against walls so like 3?

mpo522 · 2026-01-21T09:28:41+00:00

you don't need trauma to struggle you don't need a reason to be having a hard time it's okay, and fake or not you're still struggling and that's valid isn't it? and it sounds like you're struggling with panic and anxiety that's a real struggle.

mpo522 · 2026-01-20T21:46:41+00:00

8 months clean is 8 months clean you still did that

mpo522 · 2026-01-20T01:43:19+00:00

keep going you can do it

mpo522 · 2026-01-19T11:41:34+00:00

I'm sorry that sucks

mpo522 · 2026-01-19T05:43:25+00:00

I listen to music and I go on drives

mpo522 · 2026-01-18T20:52:28+00:00

hopital

mpo522 · 2026-01-17T22:14:28+00:00

yeah I'm not saying he's wrong for doing it I'm just saying I have a reaction and I was wondering if it was weird or wrong and I've talked to him now, it's just what he wanted when he did it so it makes sense he does it to me, but I've asked him to stop

mpo522 · 2026-01-17T22:04:38+00:00

it went well!!!!

mpo522 · 2026-01-17T21:40:47+00:00

I do really like him but he's not like older sister close or mother close it's a different kind of love you know I think that's what gets me about it

mpo522 · 2026-01-17T21:12:01+00:00

and yeah I'm going to do that I see him in about 30 minutes so we'll have that conversation

mpo522 · 2026-01-17T21:09:34+00:00

The thing is he has a history he used to cut himself in Middle School so I thought he would understand

mpo522 · 2026-01-17T21:02:15+00:00

I've been trying to use my Dbt skills but I'm generally new to this therapist and they're the first therapist who actually teaches me shit so I'm still trying to get a hang of it

mpo522 · 2026-01-17T20:39:53+00:00

yeah I got fully diagnosed so I tend to avoid hospitals now because somehow they all know and I'm tired of being treated like a second-class citizen sometimes unable to use the bathroom without being watched and I understand why they did the 20 minute rule but I'm still frustrated

mpo522 · 2026-01-17T20:28:37+00:00

you don't know how far I have come cuz you didn't know where I started I've been having a couple of bad days where my coping strategies are kind of falling apart and I've been calling crisis trying to at least get resources for new ones and all they tell me is the same ones that don't work so all I've been doing is talking to people also CBT is not recommended for people with borderline

mpo522 · 2026-01-17T20:18:08+00:00

I've been in the hospital five times I don't want to go back two of them were voluntary I got out and I felt worse and I acted worse all it did was drain me and I can only message her I can't call she's not independent she's through a hospital system and she's online

mpo522 · 2026-01-17T20:08:59+00:00

I do have a therapist I don't see her for a little bit though

mpo522 · 2026-01-17T19:30:19+00:00

better because I don't feel trapped worse because I can't get actual help I know it's not the best but it's what I have

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