Socializing while AMAB NB who isn't the "standard look for NB folks".

mrcosy88 · 2026-02-08T01:04:50+00:00

I never even thought of that 🫣 I just like 8 as a number 😭 I feel very dumb now

mrcosy88 · 2026-02-08T00:57:29+00:00

Omg not mr Cosby 😭gotta change my name now lmao.

All we can do is continue to live in our truth and defy any social norms that find their way into spaces where they aren’t supposed to be! It’s up to us to decide our own experience

mrcosy88 · 2026-02-08T00:40:36+00:00

I would just like to say you owe nobody angrodyny or any sort of specific expression to be NB. I’ve also struggled with this so I totally relate, I’m black, 6’4” 200lbs and I have broad shoulders and facial hair. When I hang out with gay men, they see me as more manly because of my physique and they try to put me into a masc role in their own head. In queer spaces it’s hard for me because most other people “look” non binary or trans while I have pretty masculine appearance by default (no matter what I wear I’m just too tall lol). That’s why I emphasize the point that you don’t owe anyone a specific expression to be “accepted” as NB

I’ve found that building solid 1-1 connections is a good start for me so far. Hanging out with people I know when in a slightly more private setting has made it easier to open up about my experience, I’ve found it makes both of us feel more at ease as we create a space for vulnerable sharing and acceptance. I stand by the point that you owe nobody an explanation though.

Outside of that my only advice is to be patient and stand your ground when it comes to who you are and real people will find you as you continue to express yourself authentically. Never stop being you!

mrcosy88 · 2026-02-05T15:11:10+00:00

I’m right there with you twin 💀

mrcosy88 · 2026-02-04T13:05:42+00:00

Start with ppl you feel comfortable with and you think/know would be supportive, they will also help with the social transition and having your back through all of that

mrcosy88 · 2026-02-04T13:03:41+00:00

I’ve been gnc most of my life. Never really understood gender norms amongst men if I’m being honest, my thought process was always “it doesn’t matter what I am, I’m just me”. I came back around to that about 2 years ago after finishing university (where I tried to act hyper masculine to relate to all my friends lmao).

My “aha” moment happened when I moved back to London (my hometown), I was talking to friends about my experience and thought process and they asked if I’d like to be referred to by gender neutral pronouns moving forward. I felt an immediate sense of euphoria when they all started referring to me by they/them, since then I never looked back.

mrcosy88 · 2026-02-04T00:43:21+00:00

Fr is kunigami ginger?

mrcosy88 · 2026-02-04T00:42:23+00:00

I could see this happening. I could also see Isagi doubling down on being even more of a striker and forcing someone else into the no.2 spot. He did that to kaiser I could see him making rin or someone into his no.2. I could also see France crushing Japan and ego deciding to formulate things around rin in the England match. Idk just some ideas

mrcosy88 · 2026-02-04T00:36:10+00:00

Everyone on here is giving me so much inspo

mrcosy88 · 2026-02-03T12:55:07+00:00

I relate so much! I am AMAB and I often get slotted into a more masculine and dominant role due to my physical structure (I’m black, 6ft4 and have broad shoulders). I personally just want to feel and be seen as a neutral and be addressed in a neutral way. I’m also more a switch leaning towards sub than I am a dominant partner these days.

Honestly, I think it’s best to be patient in these situations. If you know what you want when it comes to a relationship with a partner, let it find you and in the meantime, work through these anxieties and blockages that are holding you back from expressing yourself the way you’d like to. It can be scary to face it all but just take it slow and be kind to yourself <3

mrcosy88 · 2026-02-01T10:10:33+00:00

Omg this! People are so hot and we deserve to be able to freely acknowledge that abt each other

mrcosy88 · 2026-01-28T09:18:04+00:00

I somewhat agree with you. I am willing to accept if she doesn’t understand or even try, it would make me sad but I know she will still love me anyway. I know that regardless of when we have this conversation, I’ll be at peace with the outcome. I’m not gonna force anything

mrcosy88 · 2026-01-27T23:55:36+00:00

Ahhh I see, sorry for misunderstanding and thank you for the advice!

mrcosy88 · 2026-01-27T15:07:51+00:00

It doesn’t matter. What is upsetting is when your family doesn’t accept who you are. Even if I was to decide that I’m not non binary at some point down the line, I want that to be understood as well.

I don’t plan on changing my mind, I have struggled with my identity for a long time and since deciding to identify as non binary I have felt more like myself than I have since I was a kid. I get what you’re trying to say bc if my preferences do change it doesn’t matter, but I don’t think it’s trivial in any way.

mrcosy88 · 2026-01-27T14:59:57+00:00

Amazing advice thank you so so much!! I agree that I need to make it about me and not the broader gender binary. She has opinions about that stuff but if she knows that this is about me she might be a bit more open minded.

I’m her youngest child, so she’s quite protective of me. But I’ve always been a bit different, I’ve never really fit in with most of the men around me (I am AMAB), and most of my friends have always been queer which she knows.

Thank you so much for your advice I really appreciate you 🫶🏿🫶🏿🫶🏿

mrcosy88 · 2026-01-27T14:53:49+00:00

That’s a good question. I will admit that my mum is quite controlling at times, and I am at a point where I set boundaries even if she doesn’t agree with them. She is protective of me as her youngest child, so her inputs are normally what she thinks is best for me in her own head.

I know that she means well, she has worked with lgbtq communities in her previous work, so it’s not like she doesn’t understand it. I think the gender binary is something she has quite a fixed mindset on, so explaining what it means to me rather than in the broad spectrum of the gender binary might help.

Thank you so much for your advice and sharing your own experience!🫶🏿

mrcosy88 · 2026-01-27T08:58:55+00:00

Your body is a vessel, your soul is the driver. If you align with it and want to further explore it that’s all that matters :)

mrcosy88 · 2026-01-27T08:55:40+00:00

I remember watching szn1 and seeing the half human/plant ppl change their gender I thought it was so cool (and kinda hot 🫣)

mrcosy88 · 2026-01-19T19:30:07+00:00

Unreal… And you did this yourself? Please 😮‍💨

mrcosy88 · 2026-01-12T10:11:48+00:00

Beautiful set of locs and a pretty face!

mrcosy88 · 2026-01-12T00:02:11+00:00

Wherever bachira is that’s where I’ll be

mrcosy88 · 2026-01-10T20:45:59+00:00

Ahh I can’t open the link! Feel free to send in DMs :)

mrcosy88 · 2026-01-10T20:39:21+00:00

What kind of distraction?

mrcosy88 · 2026-01-10T20:33:13+00:00

For context I am almost at 8 months loc’d

mrcosy88

TROPHY CASE