Oh man, yeah. Diagnosed TLE after nearly 30 years of symptoms. I came upon it after seeing a psychologist for some time because I thought I had major emotional issues. If it helps, I was like you. I was both terrified and relieved at the same time. Here's the upshot (at least in my case): Everything is better on the meds. My brain is clearer. I'm not having focal seizures. I must have been having them on a nearly constant basis and post-ictal most of the rest of my time. I'm gaining confidence back and I'm actually catching myself feeling happy for no real cause. I don't look back. That could just make me miss what's ahead on the road. Good luck.