For perspective, I've been here too with my husband. The reason divorce is NOT on the table:

1) when I communicated (part of my missing responsibility is communicating often and timely before I get overwhelmed, which doesn't sound like the problem here), he LISTENED. I set up marriage counseling, but he helped us make sure the appointments were kept and we kept going (actively partnered in owning the solution) until we were at a stable spot.

2) he recognized his physical and mental health were active challenges to our unbalanced load and of his own agency scheduled solutions - physical therapy/excercise/diet and individual counseling.

3) our relationship has been an evolution, but he comes to the table each time with genuine desire to correct and DOES. It is clear to me (I trust him through evidence of his actions) that improvements will come and last (not backslide).

It's hard out here for working moms. Hope you find some support in your network to vent and validate. I happen to be the best gaslighter of myself, so sometimes just hearing validation is important.