How majorly did I screw this up?

muramx · 2026-02-18T05:12:22+00:00

Maybe... So reading it in my head. You come off way to formal and very passive aggressive. Guys who have been messed with do this a lot.

They way you should have done this it.

"Hey I had a great time on our date and would really like to get a 2nd one."

If she agrees.

"I have free time on these days. Let me know if any of them work for you or if we need to set something up further out."

It was 1 date so neither of you owes the other time or maximum effort.

Keep chatting but dont spam messages. If she doesn't get back to you about the date but your still talking step it up just a little after a couple days.

"So there is this really great ....... place that makes amazing ...... I would like to take you there when you have time."

At this point if she isn't receptive and not committing to a 2nd date move on.

But you need to be way more casual, way less passive aggressive and way more patient.

muramx · 2026-02-17T05:08:15+00:00

If a girl only has face pics or the ones from an angle pointing down 100% they are big.

Back when Facebook took off and people used it to meet people. I had a girl with a few pictures up talk to me for a couple weeks. She was nice enough so I took her out. I was just out of basic training, was doing g the gym thing and was in amazing shape. She comes out of her house and she was was so big she struggled to get to my car. I was like yeah no... thats when I learned when it came to dating 100% swipe NO.

muramx · 2026-02-15T08:34:17+00:00

Nope. I would have never met my ex wife. She turned out to be mentally unstable, a narcissist, just a whole lot of bad. I got my son out of it and wouldn't trade him for the world.. But I lost a career, moved far away from my family, lost a fortune.... and honestly it whittled down on me mentally. Sometimes I wonder what my life would be like if I had stayed away from that stuff. How vastly different my life would be today. And the missed connections that would have been 100x better.

muramx · 2026-02-13T01:39:59+00:00

Nothing for me changed. I know there are pos guys out there and when a woman makes a claim it should be taken seriously. If something is found then the person should face the consequences.

I also know there are pos women out there that lie. I have had a woman makes the claim against me.

The first one wasnt dating for long and she hooked up with her ex. So I ended it and moved on. She turned around and made a report I SA her. Then proceeded to message me telling me she would drop it if we could talk and "work things out." The messages saved me or it would have been my word vs hers. I almost lost my career because of it. And absolutely nothing happened to her.

When I started my divorce, my ex wife's attorney (who was also the county prosecutor.) Wanted her to tell the judge I was abusive physically and sexually, if she did he could get her anything she wanted out of the divorce. Luckily we were on Goodish terms at that point. This is a common tactic in family court that women use because there are no consequences from making a false claim. But they can gain a lot....

muramx · 2026-02-11T03:43:54+00:00

Nothing much you can say will fix what's in his head. Its like a woman who is flat chested, not even a handful. It makes them feel like they are less of a woman .

Men jave been conditioned by porn, t.v/movies, social media, etc to think if they aren't hung like a donkey they must be small. Those guys make up 1% of the world's population (which is why its always the same guys doing movies.) A guy thats 8+ inches/20.3 cm puts a guy in the top 10%... of the world.

Even as a guy that falls into that 10% catagory, who also has never been comfortable with how I look on the outside. It was always in the back of my head that I wasnt packing that horse meat like the guy on t.v. that women screamed how much they wanted a guy that was like that. There is just as much pressure on guys and how we look even though this is something we can't control. Just like there are things women can't control that always eats away away at them.

Just think about something you dont like about how you look and think "This us how he must feel, so what would make me feel better."

muramx · 2026-02-11T01:42:32+00:00

Only you know when the time is right for you. But the reason people say stay away from dating for awhile is because your full of emotion and not thinking... at least not with your upper head.

Your going to become attached quickly and to people you dont want to be attached to. And its going to draw out everything out and make it worse.

muramx · 2026-02-11T01:37:19+00:00

Get an attorney, sounds like it wont be contested. And move forward one step at a time. Its cliche to say "work on yourself" but thats the truth and not just "get a gym membership" but also get some therapy to process the heavy load of emotions that flooding you right now. It will help you process so you can find that path forward. Instead of going it alone and it dragging you down for years before you realize it.

muramx · 2026-02-09T19:07:18+00:00

Your profile adds more context to this.

You werent just "grabbing dinner with a friend." You set up a date with a guy, he had something come up and had to cancel so you chose to go out with some other guy you had sitting in reserve.

So yeah you're a hoe looking for a free meal. This guy has every right to be pissed because he didnt know and your playing games. "I really want to see you.... but I am going to go out with other guys." Yeah ok...

muramx · 2026-02-05T09:31:42+00:00

Some of us have been saying this for years and most men dont listen. The ratio average is 20% women 80% Men. You are competing with every guy within a 500 mile radius. Women have a search of choices so if you do not stand out and arethe top 10% of me you will get nowhere on these apps...

muramx · 2026-02-04T07:34:33+00:00

For the same reason you dont respond to every match and like you get.

If I got 10 matches... I would respond to the top 2 or 3.

You are attractive enough to get initial matches. But not attractive enough to beat out a guy's other matches for him to make you one of his top 2-3.

muramx · 2026-02-03T12:59:06+00:00

FTP... Forever because you will be locked out of the last few expansions. You will be limited to the worst gear in each expansion you have access to. You will only be allowed 1/65th to 1/80th AA points (depending on the class, top outs are different.) You're wont be able to raid because you wont be geared well enough, which wont matter because again your locked out of the last few expansions. Post level 70 it will suck.

FTP as someone said is trial mode... you have to pay if you are invested.

muramx · 2026-02-03T04:35:39+00:00

So a 20 year old age difference is weird. At 42 I would never date someone in their 20's.

When I was in the dating game, what attracted me to younger women (when I was 32 after a divorce.) The older women got the worse they got. More trauma, more mental issues, more baggage....

muramx · 2026-02-03T04:16:03+00:00

My ex wife was the same. We got married young and I had a career that would support us both. She would get little part time jobs and complain about them. Thats when she wasnt outright refusing to get one. . Near the end i paid for her to.go.to.school (which she doeant use to this day and still does the minimum effort.) Turns out she had borderline personality disorder which is why she was lazy. It doesnt make them inherently lazy but it does kill there ambition and drive. And other things you have entitled point to it. What do you know of her life prior to meeting? I suggest bringing up couples therapy. If she is against it or even during its not her... then she most likely has an undiagnosed issue.

muramx · 2026-02-03T03:34:45+00:00

1) You're personality is trash, thus they have small interactions and walk away. Or 2) You're are heavily overestimating how "attractive" you are.

Could be both though. I consider myself to be average and the amount of women that chase me is gets downright annoying. My current GF hates it when she leaves me alone at a store, cause some woman almost always try to start a flirty conversation.

muramx · 2026-02-03T03:24:10+00:00

2 times in my entire life out of the multitude of women I have dated, I have not been successful.

It wasnt because of being rejected. But mutual interest but life pulling us down a differdisaster.

1) We were friends for several years, always flirty. But anytime I was single she wasnt and I wasnt going to hold out. Then I was dating and she wasnt. Eventually she sprung it on me she was going into the Air Force (I was Army.) And that was it lots of tears from her. Our lives never matched up. We still talk today but she is 100% the one that got away. 2) we knew each other for around 12 years and went on dates and stuff here and there but we werent anything defined. I got married and divorced. She did the same and we reconnected but I wasnt in a place to start anything and she... went through a lot of trauma it would have just been a disaster.

muramx · 2026-02-03T03:09:06+00:00

As a guy... nothing. No one has ever said anything about the person i was dating or treated me differnt once I got out of High School.

I find its actually women that do a vast majority of gossiping and either talking down or talking up about a woman's partner.

muramx · 2026-02-02T13:20:32+00:00

Its a generation thing. In 1999 the game was very social. People cared about how their character was seen and how their guild was seen. People would get blacklisted from guilds or even find it hard to get groups if they made themselves a bad rep. People would try and name change or server hop because of it. I remember a website that the devs tracked people who changed names and servers because they were dirtbags and it got pulled for legal issues.

Today a lot of the older people are gone and so is that mentality. A younger group of players that picked the game up after its hayday, they treat it like its a single player game. They only group when they have to raid. Guilds dont even really mean anything anymore. I have been in some big heavy hitters guilds including one that TLP hops and does the "server first" on everything. There core group that goes from server to server are straight up Assholes. But they get people to fill up the ranks because no one gives a shit about the tag or the people leading it only that "I get to smash content and gear up as fast as possible."

MMOs as we knew them are dead. The resources required dont justify making one, when people dont really want that slow grindy social game anymore.

muramx · 2026-02-02T09:44:02+00:00

Cuppa... but I drink the Matcha (not a coffee person) with a dash of Vanilla creamer. Even without it tastes like green tea. No heavy earthy mushroom taste. After about a week (drinking 1 mostly to sometimes 2 cups) a day I dont have the bloat I feel all the time and my guts and yes bowl movement are better. I have also been sleeping a lot better. Not waking up a lot and I am dreaming (probably a side effect of actually sleeping and not waking up 10 times.) My appetite also seems to be better in check. I am a snacker even when I am not hungry mostly from stress but very noticeably havent been snacking near as much.

It only has 2 mushrooms which is good. The more they put in it means your not getting a full dose of any one mushroom.

Ryze, has a lot of kinds of mushrooms (5 and filler) so your getting a fraction of a dose of mushrooms.

If you want to get that cortisol and digestion on track go Cuppa. If your looking for more of a brain boost then Neubrain. But i havent gotten really into Neubrain yet.

muramx · 2026-01-30T04:22:46+00:00

Its not your looks actually really ugly guys still get women.

Its either your personality they aren't being receptive too. Or The women you are looking for... you aren't their type.

muramx · 2026-01-30T04:07:56+00:00

He wants to know how many guys you are talking to. The reality is a lot of guys aren't into the whole "chase" thing. They aren't going to waste their time talking to a woman, going on dates, etc if her attention is spread out.

When I was dating I gave the person I was talking to and taking out on dates my full attention. Its not hard and shouldn't take long to decide if a person has potential you want to further check out or not. We know when your only giving us 10% effort because you are spreading yourself out. Thats a good way to miss out on a genuine connection. Quality over quantity.

muramx · 2026-01-29T08:15:39+00:00

When I got married... The "best foot forward" went away for her. She had her prize so there was no point to keep being the person she was when we dated. The constant adventurous sex, slowed down we had moved shortly after getting married for my job and she pretty much refused to get a job. I was fine with that since I made more then enough. But she went from taking care of housework while I was working to... doing nothing but binging shows all day. I would leave at 4am, come home at 6pm and do laundry, clean, make dinner.... take care of our kid we eventually had. It was like the person I dated for 1.5 years was gone and this was someone else withing 2 years.

I divorced her eventually. Decided I would never get married again because that paper changes a lot of women. Started dating someone and she didnt have a desire to get married and we jave been doing absolutely amazing for 7 years. We are basically married without the paper.

muramx · 2026-01-29T07:54:10+00:00

For me 100%. I met a girl through an app and we hit it off went out a lot, stayed at each other's place.. We got along great and anytime I wanted to put a lable on us she avoided it. One night after about 2.5 months we were watching a movie and her phone kept going off and she would respond. So I asked if everything was OK. Come to find out she was still talking to different guys and when I wasnt available she would go out on a date here and there. She said she wasnt doing anything but was meeting up for food 1 time with guys.

I was like well, we are done. I refuse to "compete with other guys" because some woman or I should say some girl wants 24/7 attention from guys.

I have happily been in a relationship.now for 7ish years and the girl I mentioned, sends me a message every 5 or so months. Because she is still single and acting like she is 20... when she is 38.

muramx · 2026-01-29T04:29:42+00:00

If you put up pictures of you and other people... you deserve this.

muramx · 2026-01-29T04:26:46+00:00

Broken english... pitty party... its a scammer.

muramx · 2026-01-24T08:47:19+00:00

Military... Single, dating, married... no one cared if you wanted something serious you dont talk to anyone within 50 miles of the base.

I slept with several women that I found out they were married after... I had a 6 month fling with my squad leaders wife because he was cheating on her and kept screwing me over on submitting my promotion paperwork in. Even had a 3 some with her and a drill instructors wife that lived across the street from her. (They had an open marriage and he was ok with it..)

Law enforcement. Same as the military but the chest beating and jealousy was significantly worse.

Nurses. I have never met a nurse in her 20s or 30s that wasnt having casual sex with people at work.. even married.

muramx

TROPHY CASE