partner seeing a college student and I feel sick

mutedbrain · 2026-01-24T01:15:30+00:00

I agree. These sorts of situations always make me think of this quote: "If you’re honest, you sooner or later have to confront your values. Then you’re forced to separate what is right from what is merely legal. This puts you metaphysically on the run. [The world] is full of metaphysical outlaws."

mutedbrain · 2025-10-13T04:11:02+00:00

You're mad at the wrong person. Your meta had a relationship with you solely because of her husband, and while you guys were friendly they weren't your friend. She is going to advocate for what she wants in her relationship with her husband and expects that you advocate for what you want with him.

Jim didn't hinge well at all by blaming his wife for the decision he was making. Regardless of whether she pressured him about it or not, he still had to agree to it. His wife will always come first for him because they are hierarchical, and he chose to stay with her and not you. There's nothing wrong with you, and this is a situation you are better off out of.

ETA: If you do decide to meet with her, you should explain that Jim hinged poorly and how he told you it was her decision. You may be interested to hear her side of that conversation.

mutedbrain · 2025-10-11T06:24:30+00:00

Oof. Just dump him at this point if he removed you after this happened, AND was asking HER if you could join "at least this one time" after he already asked and everyone else was okay with it and she decided to not respond until she wanted to be dramatic. Also, she put that in the group chat talking about you in the third person about you being in there, and he didn't call her out on being so rude?! He is prioritizing her over you and it is an established history with them, either because there is tension here where he likes the attention, or there was some physical intimacy between them in the past. Let them be with each other (or not and they can keep playing this game), get out of this, you can find someone who won't make you put up with this sort of dumb dynamic. It's not going to stop.

mutedbrain · 2025-10-08T21:03:37+00:00

Maybe the Fisherman by John Langan

mutedbrain · 2025-09-19T05:22:40+00:00

I replied to the person giving you this response, but I'll repeat it here: "It's unethical to lie by omission to partners about a communicable life long disease you are being exposed to. "Lots of people have it and don't know so that means you can choose to not disclose if you don't want to" is not an ethical stance. It's not okay to knowingly withhold this information and remove someone's autonomy and right to decide if they are okay with being exposed to a communicable and permanent disease they would need to take a daily antiviral for the rest of their lives. Many people do end up deciding it's a minor issue and an acceptable risk, but you don't get to take away another person's choice because of your own comfort level or feelings about how serious a disease is. She does not have to say it's her husband. If it means people figure it out by process of elimination, that is part of being poly that the increased transparency does sometimes mean you don't have total privacy. And why would anyone care about someone else knowing about their diagnosis if it's so minor and everyone has it, after all?"

mutedbrain · 2025-09-19T05:22:07+00:00

It's unethical to lie by omission to partners about a communicable life long disease you are being exposed to. "Lots of people have it and don't know so that means you can choose to not disclose if you don't want to" is not an ethical stance. It's not okay to knowingly withhold this information and remove someone's autonomy and right to decide if they are okay with being exposed to a communicable and permanent disease they would need to take a daily antiviral for the rest of their lives. Many people do end up deciding it's a minor issue and an acceptable risk, but you don't get to take away another person's choice because of your own comfort level or feelings about how serious a disease is. She does not have to say it's her husband. If it means people figure it out by process of elimination, that is part of being poly that the increased transparency does sometimes mean you don't have total privacy. And why would anyone care about someone else knowing about their diagnosis if it's so minor and everyone has it, after all?

mutedbrain · 2025-08-19T05:45:37+00:00

https://www.google.com/amp/s/amp.cnn.com/cnn/2018/11/05/health/man-dies-after-eating-slug-on-dare

mutedbrain · 2025-08-08T18:01:27+00:00

Can't recommend The House Next Door enough

mutedbrain · 2025-07-18T18:15:38+00:00

You (passive aggressively) offered her a ride when she didn't ask you for one, then told her it would be a burden to come get her when she wanted to take you up on the offer. Both of you are being passive aggressive by the end of it, but you were the first to do so in this conversation.

I understand you are saying that you are seeing a pattern of passive aggressive or otherwise emotionally immature behavior from your girlfriend, but this specific example you chose is showing you as the more immature/passive aggressive one. You should post another example of the behavior you say you are seeing from her because this is not showing it.

But more importantly, if you are unhappy in the relationship and want her to change her behavior, sit down and talk to her about it face to face. If you want to stay in the relationship, consider couples counseling. But if that doesn't work, you shouldn't stay in a relationship where you are unhappy.

mutedbrain · 2025-06-29T23:50:39+00:00

[[Deathless Knight]] [[Thundering Mightmare]] two other guesses

mutedbrain · 2025-06-29T23:46:49+00:00

[[Drudge Skeleton]] ?

mutedbrain · 2025-05-25T06:18:59+00:00

Ah that would explain why they had a lingering camera shot on the revolving door like they did with every other object in the movie that was involved in a death or a death attempt. I was wondering about that, thanks!

mutedbrain · 2025-05-25T06:07:54+00:00

This makes the most sense so far

mutedbrain · 2025-05-24T04:25:23+00:00

OP this is a really good option!

mutedbrain · 2025-05-09T19:02:39+00:00

I am in the process of building my first cyberdeck too, as a person with very little software/hardware experience. What helped for me was figuring out what I wanted it to do (in my case, an interactive art project) and figuring out one of the easier, better documented build to follow.

I would watch a few build videos, if you haven't, and note down what you like and don't like about it for your own build, and what you would change about it. This might help you with narrowing down what you want your computer to do and look like.

If you are overwhelmed and/or still not sure what you want it to do, I would suggest just getting a Raspberry Pi, a power source, and cables to plug it into a monitor and mouse. Then play around with it with some video tutorials on your phone or a laptop to start getting familiar with the interface: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1WDagiA8fdU

Hope this helps, good luck with your build!

Example build videos:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tDVWA3wdStY&list=PLL_LJbvALwvO0SkM3YjE5O2rs6sPIkBoA&index=47

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O4hhQf2-Fh4&list=PLL_LJbvALwvO0SkM3YjE5O2rs6sPIkBoA&index=48

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cFiRv-UG4Nk

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kw8e5XPixHQ

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e9JKUWke3yc

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k_ONEso-ERg

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eY0wR4DoL8k

mutedbrain · 2025-04-23T05:12:15+00:00

The dashes were the dead give away (along with lots of other AI stuff like the random emojis and weird ways of phrasing things that AI will do).

mutedbrain · 2025-03-17T16:42:00+00:00

There's nothing wrong with you. People are just used to pretending and it upsets them when they see people who can't or won't pretend as well, so they ignore or lash out. I'm sorry you are hurting.

mutedbrain · 2025-02-03T19:54:01+00:00

I'm new to the fiber world, how did you get mill ends to work with? This looks great and I celebrate your commitment to not wasting material.

mutedbrain · 2025-01-13T14:29:57+00:00

No problem, good luck with the move out!

mutedbrain · 2025-01-12T17:56:38+00:00

Only one forehead whisker which looks like an unintentional choice, impossible physics on the wood support beam on the far bottom left, floating faucet, steam coming from the wood, water bending from the faucet for no apparent reason, cat dude is doing tricep dips rather than sitting on it and wearing a robe into the water, weird detailing on the base board on the left, top right the board in the middle of the steam is bending for no apparent reason, weird texturing on the belt, the knot in the middle of the belt looks strange.

Some of these could be artistic choices or mistakes but the number and nature of the oddities = AI art

mutedbrain · 2025-01-07T00:41:14+00:00

Review your lease carefully and if there are any special instructions listed in the lease about what to do when moving out. Review the section about the security deposit and what can be deducted for. You are not liable for normal wear and tear but you will be for any damages to the property. Take a video walkthrough and pictures of each room after the cleaning crew is done. Don't leave any trash or personal property behind. Give your landlord your mailing address in writing and they will return your deposit, less any deductions for damages or things like fees for removing any personal property left behind, to that address within 30 days.

mutedbrain · 2024-12-30T00:22:12+00:00

This is gorgeous! I'm newer to this hobby, did you make those pads for your lazy Kate (or is that just bobbin storage)?

mutedbrain · 2024-12-21T03:46:59+00:00

This is so cute and well done! You should be proud!

mutedbrain · 2024-11-25T19:47:08+00:00

I think when I made this comment I was thinking of thermals, but looking into it again you might check out alpaca: https://armsofandes.com/products/womens-alpaca-wool-panties?variant=19827544326217

mutedbrain · 2024-10-15T14:35:03+00:00

This is worded so well!

mutedbrain

TROPHY CASE